i just wanted to take a few minutes to let each and every one of you know how very much i appreciate you being here.
i dont post very often but i read everyday.
i have been doing really really well since april 11. that was my D day. the day i began a new way of living. not so much a diet. but i decided i wanted to live to be old. really OLD! and i wasnt going to live very long the way i was going. i was fat. very fat. did look as fat as i am with my clothes on. but it is/was there.
i had a difficult week this week. nothing really traumatic but lots of little things that added up to making me really mad/sad/angry/depressed. things that were truly out of my control and i wasnt going to be able to change them. i had exercised for 109 days in a row. (yeah, me!)
and yesterday..........i didnt want to do it anymore. i didnt care. i was so sad and overwhelmed (by things that really wont matter in the long run-really even in the short run) that i did NOTHING! i watched 3 movies on dvd, took 3 baths, ate taco bell and laid on the couch and felt sorry for myself. i did ride bike for 15 minutes but decided it was too much trouble. of course, i shared my deep unhappiness with my husband and made him pretty miserable too. bless his heart. he does love me cause i was pretty unlovable for past couple of days and he didnt get angry. confused? hoo boy.
today i was going to continue down the same path. i was planning on sitting in the house like a crazy old hermit--you know, muttering to myself about how horrible the world is and how pitiful my life is. i wanted to be miserable and i deserved it and by god! i was gonna do it.
so i sat here at my computer with my coffee (ran out of cream this morning too--one more "life is unfair" moment) and i read. i read all the posts of people just starting out and not sure what to do and so full of hope. and i read the ones of people who have been doing this a long time and some have succeeded and some are still in the process. and thru all of them (especially you, Lyn--
--you are my own personal inspiration); the one thing in common?
they keep trying. somedays that is all you can do. try.
a snippet of a song keeps going thru my head (this is how we do it....this is how we do it) i think it is a rap song and i am not a rap fan but it speaks to me.
so today this is how we do it. i am headed out the door to go workout and i am going to eat something good for lunch. and tomorrow i am making lyns cheesy enchiladas so i have delish lunches for my work week (i work saturday thru tuesday)
and tomorrow? this is how we do it......