Borrowed this from the 20-somethings because I think they apply to everyone!!!
Self-Esteem has never been my strong suit
So I wanted to share these tips I found online.
Please comment and with the ones you like or don't, or do or don't do. Add your own too!
First, let me give a tip I read today (I can't remember the source) that said to accept compliments! ... i really like that one, because I always shoot down compliments, if not out loud--at least in my head.
1.Do not use your weight to measure your self-worth What does weight have to do with self-worth? Your self-worth is the sum of everything that makes you special and unique - not just your thigh and waist measurements! Add up your assets, talents, how you treat others, how you treat yourself, the contributions you make to your family, friends and community. Now you have self-worth.
2.Count your blessings. You have a lot of things to be thankful for a home, a loving family, friends you enjoy, a job, a sunny day, the knowledge you've acquired - even things like shoes, a coat. Many people don't have these things. A mind that counts blessings has no room for self-pity. So you don't wear a size 2? Neither did Eleanor Roosevelt!
3.Are you continually playing negative tapes in your mind? Eject them and insert new tapes! You may have to make a conscious effort. When the critical tape starts playing, picture yourself hitting the "stop" button and insert a new, positive tape.
4.Don't use "all or nothing" thinking. No one is a "total" failure. Most things you do right. Just because you sometimes make a mistake or take a wrong path does not make you a "total" failure. It makes you human. Besides, the president of CBS was recently asked for his secret to success. His answer: failures - because how else would we learn?
No one starts from zero. You probably eat pretty well a lot of the time. We can always make improvements, but consider the glass half full, not half-empty!
Strut your stuff! Shine! Show the world your talents. We all have them. Capitalize on what you do well. I'll never dance Swan Lake, but then again, I'll bet that ballerina doesn't play a mean piano like I do.
7.Give thanks to your body for what is does for you. Appreciate its functional nature. It's a pretty remarkable machine. You can use it to take a walk along the beach, hug someone, listen to a concerto, make love - or go shopping! And it can do all of these things no matter what shape or size it is.
8.Educate yourself (and those around you) about issues of size and weight. Learn what's fact and what's fiction. What the research really says and what most people believe are two entirely different things. Reputable researchers will tell you that obesity is still a complex, poorly understood condition that has very little to do with lack of willpower and a whole lot to do with biology and physiology. Most importantly - especially for those who are considered "overweight" - stop blaming yourself. It's not your fault. The research continues to show this over and over.
Become preoccupied with the world... not with dieting. When we're constantly dieting, weighing, measuring, counting calories, calculating fat grams, recording our feelings in food diaries and agonizing over what to eat and what not to eat, we have little time left for what's going on in the rest of the world. And it's such an interesting place!
10.Put nothing on hold as a reward for weight loss. A Largely Positive member recently suggested:"The best advice I ever got was to make a list of the things I would do differently once I was thin - then pick the top one and do it right now. The item at the top of my list was to take flying lessons and now I'm a single-engine land pilot!"
11.Develop a personal style that announces you. Find some signature pieces. Never ever put off buying attractive clothes until you lose weight - you don't have to wear a 10 to be a 10! Don't buy into the silly notion that you can only wear dark colors because they're more "slimming". At best, dark colors shave off five pounds. Big deal! If I have a choice between looking five pounds thinner or wearing lime green, I'm going for the lime green!
And Women of America: We do not have "figure flaws," despite what many of the magazines tell us. Each of us is simply shaped differently. It's called diversity. We appreciate it in flowers. Why not in people?
13.Surround yourself with positive, supportive people. Tell weight critics that your size and shape are no longer topics on the conversational buffet table! Eliminate negative people from your life. Surely you have enough supportive people in you circle of family and friends that you'll never miss the "nay-sayers."
Look into your past for sources of low self-esteem. Retrieve critical comments that were made to you, especially as a child. You will probably discover that your body image was shaped by other people and outside influences. You are an adult now. You have better information. Refute these old messages and from now on, shape your own body image.
15.Concentrate on developing a healthy lifestyle rather than losing weight. Developing a healthy lifestyle is positive and can be measured in lots of ways. Losing weight has only one measure of success: the scale.
Slow down! If we can't remake ourselves overnight, we feel we've failed. We need instant gratification. The truth is slow weight loss is the only kind that will ever last (haven't you noticed the fine print in ads for quick weight loss products that says, "Results not typical"?) Stop setting weight loss deadlines: for the class reunion, the wedding, the party. Make weight management an ongoing part of your "healthstyle."
You've hear of PMS? Try having PMA - Positive Mental Attitude! How you feel about yourself is how others will feel about you. Your attitude is always reflected back to you. I guarantee it!
Remember that society is not always right about things. Just because we have a cultural obsession with thinness doesn't make it right. Society has a long list of injustices and intolerance. Like human beings, societies are imperfect and make mistakes.
Recognize and fight size prejudice. Size prejudice is often called "the last acceptable prejudice." One thing we can all do is stop laughing - at fat jokes. There is nothing funny about comedy that inflicts pain. As a little girl, I took every fat joke personally. Maybe big girls don't cry, but little girls do.
Remember, in the final analysis - it's the size of your heart that counts, not the size of your body.
(they have some things on their website that I totally disagree with, but this was really cool, I thought)