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Failure to Realize

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Old 01-16-2008, 03:23 AM   #1
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Default Failure to Realize

I was wondering when you all realized that you had 100 lbs or more to lose, Was it depressing, was it sad?How did you feel?

I knew it was coming on, but never wanted to believe it. Until the scale reached 262 at the doctors office. I was mortified and wanted to cry. Even more that since that last time I was at the doctors office I weighed 220 (and was there because I found out I had insulin resistant and the doc put me on a speical diet)

I NEED to lose 100lbs, But I'll be happy with just losing 50-80lbs for now. I mean I won't quit until I'm healthy but I know that 100lbs is a long ways from now.

It started like 3 yrs ago after I had my son (before I was pregnant i weighed 140) and I gained 100lbs during pregnancy(because I was battleing ednos, and never ate) so when I finally did eat the pounds packed on well. Then 2 years ago, I lost 30lbs (putting me at 210) And last january I vowed to lose 50lbs before summer. However, I ended up gainin 50lbs!

Did anyone else have this same problem?Make a commitment and then fail?What if I know i'm going to fail, and I don't wanna set my self up for failure?
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Old 01-16-2008, 04:08 AM   #2
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Did anyone else have the problem of making a commitment and then failing? Oh boy, I failed a thousand times before I succeeded! Seriously, I spent four decades of my life on the diet rollercoaster before I figured out what worked (and what didn't). But each time I regained weight wasn't really a failure because I discovered something new about me or diets every time. I guess they were all learning experiences!

It took me a long time to acknowledge that I had more than 100 pounds to lose -- well into my weight loss journey. In fact, my first long-term goal was to reach 160 pounds because that was my lowest adult weight, so that was a 97 pound goal. It wasn't until I got close to 160 that I realized I needed to go lower and that losing weight wasn't all that hard!

But 97 pounds or 100+ pounds is a really hard number to deal with, so I deliberately focused on five pound losses and never let myself look at the big picture. We can all lose five pounds, right? No sweat! So I just lost five pounds ... over and over again.

I know how overwhelming your weight is to you right now. A friend of mine once said that needing to lose 100+ pounds is like being handed a cup and spoon and being told to move a mountain. But if you keep at it and never quit, you WILL move that mountain! Do it day by day, one foot in front of the other, five pounds at a time, and you will reach your goal. You're not setting yourself up for failure -- you're setting yourself up for the most exciting and rewarding journey of your life!

We know you can do it and we'll be here for you every step of the way.
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Old 01-16-2008, 04:34 AM   #3
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Meg, When I first read your post I felt like you knew what you were talking about,and was very very informative on how it felt, like you were very inspiring, almost like you've been where I am before...

Then I looked at your before and after pictures,and read your story, and was like Dayum (pardon my lang)I am amazed, and now I know you REALLY do know where i'm coming from!At almost the exact same weight I am! Now I know that this journey isn't going to be easy, and yes it'll probably take many years of failing,succeeding,and so on to get right there...But now that I have saw you, and read your story, I feel much better knowing that you have been there, and you made it, even through failures, and even through succeeding.
So, 5lb weightloss....here I come.
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Old 01-16-2008, 06:28 AM   #4
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Me too I was very inspired by Meg's story. Well, actualy I was browsing on Google pics with "before" and "after", but real pics of real people, not the "before" and "after" marketing for certain products... And I found Meg's pics. That's how I discovered 3FC. That is where I found my motivation. And where I learned that is much more easy to move a castle brick by brick than trying to put it all on your shoulders...
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Old 01-16-2008, 07:15 AM   #5
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Wow those before and after pics are amazing! You did a great job and I hope to be as successful with my new healthier lifestyle. Thanks for motivating others who think its hopeless!
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Old 01-16-2008, 07:29 AM   #6
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Great quote, Vek. I should try & remember that sometimes....
I'm with you Seraphim.... when I think about how much weight I need to lose, I get totally overwhelmed! So - I focus on just 1 day at a time. And I set myself "short" goals, instead of the whole big one.
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Old 01-16-2008, 07:32 AM   #7
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I don't know that I really wanted to acknowledge how much weight I had to lose... I had known for a long long time that I was fat... obese even. But I don't think I even thought I COULD lose 100 pounds!! I had failed many times before. I didn't want to bother trying, again, when I thought I would only fail.

A lot of little things came together to convince me to try again, but, like Meg said, I couldn't really conceive of the whole picture at once. I am still sometimes amazed by the fact that I have lost 120 pounds!

Give it a shot! We are here to help!!
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Old 01-16-2008, 07:36 AM   #8
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Well I haven't until now made a commitment to change my life. Yess 100+ pounds is a lot but I am determined to live healthy. Right now I am in the stage of figuring out what works for me. I think for me at this time, I am doing well with counting calories and doing the Couch-to-5K Running Plan.
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Old 01-16-2008, 08:33 AM   #9
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I failed dozens and dozens of times. Luckily there's not limit to how many times you get to try this. All you need is to be successful one time. The final time and all those past attempts will seem inconsequential almost.

Please, I urge you to NOT let the large numbers scare you. When I FINALLY made the decision to lose the weight, I knew that I needed to lose over 150 big ones. 150!!!! Sheesh. Deep breath. Deep breath. But I tell you, I was very lucky. I had such a feeling of determiniation come over me. I knew, I mean I really, really KNEW, deep, deep down, that IF I stuck with a healthy eating/exercise plan that I could indeed lose the weight. All the weight. I was just that determined. And that got me EXCITED. I knew that every time I turned down the "bad" food and every time I added some more activity in my day, I was that much closer to getting to my goal, and of fufilling my hopes and dreams.

I broke my weight loss down into 10 lb chunks. It was much more managable that way and less scary.

The one thing I try to get across, is that it really is DOABLE. Not always easy, mind you, but doable and extremely, EXTREMELY worth it.

I've said this dozens of time, ya know the cliche', "If I can do it, anyone can". And it's the truth. I was the worlds' worst eater and terribly sedentary. I completely reversed it - and so can you. So can anybody.

Good luck and please stick around. This place is a valuable, valuable tool that I feel so fortunate to have come across.

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Old 01-16-2008, 09:04 AM   #10
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Realizing that I had over 100 pounds to lose was extremely overwhelming! I've been overweight all my life, but it was only by 30-40 pounds. Then, in just under 2 years, I gained another 75 pounds. At that point, a very big part of me thought that I'd never be able to lose this weight...and, I sometimes still struggle with these doubts.

Quote:
Originally Posted by seraphimbeauty21 View Post
But now that I have saw you, and read your story, I feel much better knowing that you have been there, and you made it, even through failures, and even through succeeding.
November of 2006, prior to making my yearly weight loss resolutions for the New Year, I was searching on-line for some type of free weight-loss support. God smiled on me that day and I found 3FC. What a wonderful supportive group of people that understand exactly where I'm coming from. And, the most important thing for me.....there are people here that have been successful at losing a lot of weight and keeping it off! This gives me hope.

Seraphim, you can do this. You can decide to not give up....to keep trying over and over again until you get it right. And, one day, you'll be maintaining your great weight loss and inspiring others who come to 3FC.
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Old 01-16-2008, 09:30 AM   #11
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I was the absolute queen of denial ! "sure i'm fat, but I look pretty good" hahah hilarious! I was NEVER photographed full-body and i'd put the double-chin in face shots down to "a bad angle" oh yah, denial is awesome!

My weight gain has been on a steady incline since I was about 22, a steady 8-15 pounds in a year, and never losing any. I lost 30 lbs. once on Atkins, and then of course ate a cookie, and gained 50. Other than that,I've never really "dieted" in earnest before.

My "wake up" moment was having dinner one night with my friend and her husband. Average sized people, my friend Ingrid is on the small side perhaps. They were talking about taking a balloon ride and her husband joked "but honey, TOGETHER we're ove 300 lbs., we'll crash" and she did the math in her head "I guess...I'm 120 and he's HUGE, he's 205 lbs!" I sat there and stared at them for about 5 minutes with my jaw open -- i was almost EXACTLY the same weight as the two of them COMBINED. I was horrified!

That was 55 lbs. ago tho Things are moving in the right direction.

Something I wanted to say about success/failure -- In my mind, it matters not WHAT you do (to a degree) but WHEN you do it. If your mind's not ready and in the right space, the body can't and won't follow.
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Old 01-16-2008, 09:35 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trazey34 View Post
In my mind, it matters not WHAT you do (to a degree) but WHEN you do it. If your mind's not ready and in the right space, the body can't and won't follow.
Well...sometimes the mind has to get with the program. During those times, I just fake it....do what I'm supposed to do and know that my mind will catch up with me eventually. If I waited until my mind was ready, I'd be at least 30 pounds heavier today....and probably more than 30.
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Old 01-16-2008, 10:03 AM   #13
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yah, but if you're already on the journey, already committed to it, then your mind's in the game - a day here and there of being out of it isn't want i meant exactly, if you get me ? lol

i'm sure we've all seen it a million times - on monday you feel "ON" and gung ho and change your entire life, but by wednesday it's mcdonalds and dair queen LOL That's what i mean - the initial committment...the stumbles along the way are blips on the radar
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Old 01-16-2008, 10:26 AM   #14
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My wake up call was from my doctor, but not in the usual way.

I went in for a routine physical and pap smear. He sat down and was discussing a few other things with me. He danced around it, but finally said, "I'd really like to see you lose some weight, but I'm sure you've tried." I sat there for a minute and thought about it. Then I looked up at him and said, "Actually, I don't think I've ever really tried to lose weight." I never remember a time when I didn't feel fat. Looking back on pictures of me when I was seven and eight, I wasn't fat. But I thought I was back then. However, by junior high, I was overweight, and in high school I was obese. I only added to the 200+ I was when I graduated. I only remember twice when I made an effort to lose weight, but the effort wasn't serious. It was a half-attempt, nothing life-changing. Once when I was about 17, and again when I was 20. My doctor looked at me like I had grown a second head. I was actually admitting that I had never tried to lose weight? He didn't say anything further about it, though.

Three months later, I decided I would make a true attempt. I researched online, cut out soda, and started logging my food. I also started walking every day. I can't wait to go back to the doctor this spring. I hope I get some sort of reaction.
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Old 01-16-2008, 12:08 PM   #15
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I never had this much weight to lose... I had always been 50 pounds overweight... but at 5'10'' I really didnt see it as a problem. Then a couple years ago MS decided to appear and my entire life changed. At 21 I was unable to do basic exercise like walk around the block... the world changed from being in the palm of my hand.. to me thinking I was dying. Anything that raised my body temperature made it worse.. and by several doctors orders I avoided warm showers and physical activity. I lost motor function, my balance, sight in one eye and had slurred speech.. so I used the whole 'well if I die tomorrow I'd regret not having chocolate today' idea.. and after a year and a half I was 325!

It actually took a doctor who had no idea of my history and no clue where I was coming from to look me in the eye and tell me I needed to lose weight. So depressing!! And I had soooo many excuses.

I did the semi-starving thing in highschool so I knew I could do it... but it was a matter of learning how to do it in a way I could do forever. It was so overwhelming at first.. I even told myself that if all I could do was lose 50 pounds I would have succeeded.... break it into small numbers. Make changes slowly and focus on the day to day. You can do this. It's a long term commitment, but it will stick.

(ps sorry I know that was all TMI.. but I'm doing really well NOW because I have relapsing/remitting MS and have been taking disease modifying treatment) I really believe that anybody can do this no matter how much they've got to lose.
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