No need whatsoever to hang your head in shame. We've ALL been there. Many, many times in fact. And there's simply NOTHING shameful about it.
I'm with OptimistK. Planning really is the only thing that ever works for me. And it will be for the rest of my life. Eating healthy doesn't happen by chance. It needs to be thought out, prepared for and taken care of in ADVANCE.
Anyway, I'm so glad to see you back again. Good luck to you and I KNOW this time really and truly CAN be YOUR time. Without a doubt.