I think I am just wallowing in self pity LOL. I feel like I am failing because even though I have lost weight, I am only LESS fat...I am STILL so big.
But the thing is, I know that I am not a failure at this. I have been consistantly losing weight for 5 months now. I guess I am just screwed up in the head. Thank you girls so much for lsitening to me whine all the time
It's hard, isn't it? I've been feeling really good about my appearance until today. Took daughter and friend shopping for homecoming dresses and sat on a chair in the mirror area. Noticed my legs are still huge. HUGE! I may have collar bones and shoulder bones and be down to a size large shirt and size 16 jeans, but I'm still fat. Almost 60 pounds down but I'm still obese on the BMI and I'm still FAT! Just sucks. But at least I'm going in the right direction and I am less fat. I'll get to not fat eventually.
Oh - and I wear 14's at old navy, too. I sure like that number even if i know it's not real!
Body image is an interesting thing, isn't it? Denial when we are fat, and denial when we're less fat. I can really relate, Mary. Sad to say, but even after almost a year at a healthy BMI, when I look at photos of myself, what I see is fat in places I don't want fat. So you're definitely not alone. While I'm sure that doesn't really help, perhaps a and a good, old-fashioned pity party will.
I was nodding when I read these posts because that's exactly how I've been feeling lately. I have felt so good about my progress. I'm now finally shaped like a woman again! For the last twenty pounds or so, I've felt better and better with each pound that left. Then - a few days ago - I started going through the angst of "How did I let myself get so big?", etc., and like you, I can't get the fact out of mind that though I am thinner, I am still not thin. Thank you for sharing your frustration. I feel so much less alone.
Although - Sheila - I believe I'm going to block your post out of my mind for the next fifty pounds or so. I want to believe that I will feel skinny AND gorgeous every day when I hit my goal weight, and I am not ready to be disillusioned on that quite yet. I just know Victoria's Secret will be looking for new models at about the time that I will feel like being photographed in my underwear!!!
Although - Sheila - I believe I'm going to block your post out of my mind for the next fifty pounds or so.
Please do!! I probably shouldn't have said anything, AND I speak only for myself. Body image has always been an issue for me, and as everyone always says, your problems (of the mental and emotional kind) really don't disappear when you lose weight. Oh, dang--that's another downer, too! I'm banning myself from this thread.
Please do!! I probably shouldn't have said anything, AND I speak only for myself. Body image has always been an issue for me, and as everyone always says, your problems (of the mental and emotional kind) really don't disappear when you lose weight. Oh, dang--that's another downer, too! I'm banning myself from this thread.
I think it's important to acknowledge that fact now, though, Sheila! When I got down into the normal range the last time I lost all of this, I also still had body image issues, which was disappointing to me, and made it somewhat easier to gain it back. To do all the work and still not feel good about my body was a let down.
What I've learned since then is that losing weight doesn't change your thinking, you have to do that work in conjunction with the weight loss. You have to learn to love yourself and appreciate your "packaging" lumps and sags and all. It's something I've started to work on and I'm not there yet. It's important for people to know that losing weight doesn't magically render our lives perfect. Our lives are still imperfect, but in a healthier package. And that's still a good thing.
You guys are right, CC and Sheila. I was just playing. And I certainly don't want to discourage ANYONE from posting, particularly those who have mastered skills that I'm trying to obtain. But, if it's all right with y'all, I'm going to hold on to my Victoria's Secret fantasy for the next forty or fifty pounds, THEN I'll worry about learning to realistically accept myself. **SIGH**
Oh Laurie!!! Don't get me wrong, I have fantasies of being a supermodel myself at the end of all this!! haa haa. Can you blame me? I'm human and a girl. If it gets us through these loooong months, then it's fun and worth it, so long as we figure out how to not be disappointed when the contracts don't come in the mail when we reach goal, right?
You just can't do it, can you, CC? Your post would have been GREAT if you hadn't added the "so long as we figure out..." part. We'll get through these loooong months together, then we'll briefly console each other before figuring out new and exciting career goals IF we don't see the contracts...
You just can't do it, can you, CC? Your post would have been GREAT if you hadn't added the "so long as we figure out..." part. We'll get through these loooong months together, then we'll briefly console each other before figuring out new and exciting career goals IF we don't see the contracts...
Alright, alright. I give in! But if we're going to do this, we need to think BIG. You and Mary and I will all become famous supermodels and inspire the rest of the country to put down their Krispy Kremes, hit the treadmill, and make the obesity crisis a thing of the past. We'll be immortalized in bronze statues in Washington D.C.! Streets will be renamed in our honor! Children will be named after us! History books will praise our efforts! Oprah will ditch Bob Greene and beg us to be her diet and fitness gurus! Ah, that'll keep me going for at LEAST a week.
You guys crack me up! I've been so busy at work lately that I'm using Labor Day to catch up with everyone.
Mary - You are so beautiful inside and out and your mind will catch up with the weighloss, but it does take a while. I'm still waiting for mind to catch up, but I'm a lot older and slower so no worries for you
Alright, alright. I give in! But if we're going to do this, we need to think BIG. You and Mary and I will all become famous supermodels and inspire the rest of the country to put down their Krispy Kremes, hit the treadmill, and make the obesity crisis a thing of the past. We'll be immortalized in bronze statues in Washington D.C.! Streets will be renamed in our honor! Children will be named after us! History books will praise our efforts! Oprah will ditch Bob Greene and beg us to be her diet and fitness gurus! Ah, that'll keep me going for at LEAST a week.
I take it all back, CC. You are WAY good at this! Although, I worry about your deification of Oprah. You seem to be building and building - step by step from being supermodels to leaving an historical legacy - and end with Oprah replacing Bob Greene with us. Interesting insight into your value system.
And, actually, all kidding aside, I fully intend on having a real and long-lasting impact on the obesity epidemic after I've concluded the weight loss part of my journey. After reading this article (link below), I was just thinking about the nonprofit organization I am going to establish. http://health.msn.com/reports/obesit...005MSN03A03002
Argh, Laurie! Sobering article... Getting to 100% of the population being overweight seems crazy (especially considering I live in the land of real, live Barbie dolls), but it has exploded so quickly that 80+% doesn't seem out of the realm of possibility. Scary.
On a lighter note, the Oprah thing was just the last thing popped into my head. In fact, it drives me a little crazy that so many people seem to worship in the church of Oprah! Like it or not, though, I guess she is a cultural phenomenon...
and a good, old-fashioned pity party will. 
I probably shouldn't have said anything, AND I speak only for myself. Body image has always been an issue for me, and as everyone always says, your problems (of the mental and emotional kind) really don't disappear when you lose weight. Oh, dang--that's another downer, too! I'm banning myself from this thread.
We'll get through these loooong months together, then we'll briefly console each other before figuring out new and exciting career goals IF we don't see the contracts... 
