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I'm taking a few days off of 3fc

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Old 08-20-2007, 10:21 AM   #1
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Thumbs down I'm taking a few days off of 3fc

Well after having somewhat of a breakdown this morning regarding my eating over the weekend, I have decided to take a few days off from 3fatchicks. There is no sence in keeping on asking for support when nothing seems to help me. It is a wast of your alls time. I really appreciate all the support here but I kind of feel like a fake making it seem like I am doing so great when in actuality, I am on my way to gaining back the 15 lbs I have already lost. I really feel out of control, like a drug adict or something. So I guess when I can snap out of what ever the **** has ahold of my mind, I will come back and continut to ask for and give support.
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Old 08-20-2007, 10:32 AM   #2
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Coming from someone who continues to do the same thing, my advice is don't go!!!

In my opinion, what you are going through is exactly what this website is for. I suggest you look all over here and possibly spend more time on 3FC!! There are so many people who have and are going through the same thing and you'll find some amazing advice here on how to get out of your rutt. Trust me, everyone here has "been there/done that" and are very supportive, even if you feel like you are constantly looking for help.
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Old 08-20-2007, 10:37 AM   #3
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How can we help you if you're not here? We want to.
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Old 08-20-2007, 10:38 AM   #4
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I do feel like I am constantly looking for help . I get so frigging mad and discusted with myself for it. I work my butt off in the gym to where my face is red and my head is busting, all to blow it when I come home and start binging. I cant stop it! I just hate all of it.
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Old 08-20-2007, 10:53 AM   #5
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I am SO sorry that you're feeling this way. Please don't feel like a fraud. You are working SO hard - you just haven't found the key to deal with those weekends yet. It's the times when I struggle when I need this place the very most and when I get the most benefit from being here.

What do you think is going on? You have to find what works for you. Nancy (I think) talked about the little girl inside of her who throws tantrums and rebels at the restrictions of her plan. She has found success in curbing that little girl by accepting her and talking to her about why she wants what she wants. Pita (I believe) extols the virtues of positive self-talk, and I have found much success in that route as well. It could be as simple as telling yourself that you are someone who stays on plan during the weekends, and plans everything out so that it's inevitable that you will stay on plan. Or maybe if you gave yourself permission to go a little off plan on the weekends, and pushed yourself a little harder on the weekdays to make up for it, it might ease the pressure and make it possible to have controlled binges that don't sabotage all of your efforts.

I don't know the answer for you, and I struggle with weekends as well. But I am finding things that work for me, and I know that you will find those things as well. Please allow us to try and help you find the keys, knowing that when we struggle, you will be be here to help us as well.
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Old 08-20-2007, 10:53 AM   #6
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I agree with the other posts Don't go!! Stay and no matter how bad your weekends are , you are getting accountability here. You are owning up to what is happening.
But only you can make this decision, and my ultimate words are I will always be here, so if you ever need to talk find me. I believe you can find the way out of this, and I know if you really want it you can do it. So I wish you luck with whatever you do, and hope that you don't go.

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Old 08-20-2007, 11:54 AM   #7
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I agree - don't go. Don't let go of the one thing that is keeping your weight loss efforts alert. I have been here for 7 years and even though I am not having any success - I don't quit. I can't even imagine what I would weigh if I ever left. 3FC is not just the successful - it's for everyone at all points in their journey. You can't figure it out if you quit working at it.
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Old 08-20-2007, 11:54 AM   #8
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Weight loss isn't for sissies. It's HARD!!!!! Don't beat yourself up, keep at it, and talk to people who know what you're going through - some who've been successful at it, and some who haven't yet.

If you're finding yourself binging, there might be a good reason for it. Are you cutting your calories so low that you feel like you're starving and eventually lose control. Cutting calories too far can act almost like you're holding your breath. You can do it for a while, but it gets harder and harder, and eventually you "let go."

Are you having a hard time thinking of this as a life-long learning and changing process? Have you found out yet which foods make you the hungriest?

I do understand where you're at. I've been there hundreds of times before. I'm kind of there now. I've been in a year long slump. It seems like I'm treading water, but not going anywhere. But even not going anywhere is progress. I have always regained what I've lose within a few months of losing it - plus a little extra (some times not so little extra) for good measure.
If you can avoid that, you're already ahead of the game.

You can do it, don't give up. Your not just welcome here, you're needed. You never know whom you'll be an inspiration to.
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Old 08-20-2007, 12:00 PM   #9
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When you're having trouble isn't the time to leave. You are giving a voice to problems that everybody has; it's not a waste of anybody's time.

Trust us, when we say that we know how you feel, we REALLY know how you feel.
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Old 08-20-2007, 12:29 PM   #10
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I have been on 3FC since November. I have seen people lose massive amounts of weight....I've seen people stop posting and come back again later to start all over. Some people never come back. Sometimes, I feel like a massive whiner...a real phoney. One week, I'm on top of the world and 100% committed. The next week, I'm struggling again and can't seem to get the eating under control. Throughout my journey, I have decided to stay on 3FC and keep posting. Reading about other people's successes and failures...their struggles and triumphs...encourages me to pick myself back up over and over again and keep going! You know that saying "out of sight, out of mind?" Don't let this happen to you. As long as you keep trying, you are successful. Never ever quit. What is the alternative? On January 1st, when its time to make those resolutions again, wouldnt you rather say "Wow! I actually lost weight this time!" If you're like me, you might make three steps forward and two steps back...but, just think....I'm still moving forward! You can move forward, too.
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Old 08-20-2007, 12:30 PM   #11
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Another voice in the chorus, Mug: please don't go. Not only will people here support your efforts (even if you think you aren't making any), you might be surprised who you can help as you share the easy and the not-so-easy parts of this journey.

Your posts are never a waste of our time. We can choose to read them, respond to them, or not, and we read, respond, or not for our own reasons. We are taught over and over again, especially us women although men hear it too, that we must put everyone else ahead of ourselves, think of others first. Put yourself ahead here. The rest of the world might call it self-centred but I think most 3FC forum folks will call it honest sharing. (Is it possible that you're giving so much of yourself to others -- work, family, friends -- that come the weekend you've nothing left for you? I have found that some of my overeating is because it seems like I have to do something, anything, that's just for me. It is ironic, of course, that overeating isn't satisfying and leaves nothing except bad feelings and poor health effects.)

Finally, you're doing lots of things right. You're exercising. You're being honest about your difficulties. And even if you blow weekends, that's less than 30% of the week, which means you're working on success over 70% of the week!

Please stay.

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Old 08-20-2007, 12:34 PM   #12
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Thanks for the kind words everyone.
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Old 08-20-2007, 01:19 PM   #13
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Mug I have been on this board for years and haven't lost any weight, in fact I am heavier than when I started. Back then though I felt terrible about myself, like I was the only person that felt this way, like I was fat and ugly and horrible. Now I know better, now I feel better about myself as a person. Maybe 3FC hasn't helped me lose weight but it has helped me regain my self esteem and self confidence. I've been where you are now and have stopped posting for awhile because I didn't feel like I was getting anywhere and also because I didn't feel like I was able to be supportive because I've never lost weight. So what? This isn't bootcamp, we are all friends, we've no expectations other than to treat everyone the way you would want to be treated. Best wishes with whatever you decide to do.
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Old 08-20-2007, 01:44 PM   #14
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I am a master quitter. I go to the IT'S HAAAAARD, I DON'T WANNA place at the slightest provocation. Now, having just revealed that part of myself so publicly, maybe it won't have as much power anymore. It seems like that's what this support site is all about, learning not to take ourselves so seriously. It is for me, anyway. If I can laugh at myself and my struggles, it strengthens me, and blunts my ability to feel like I'm unique. Cuz I ain't. There isn't a thing I can feel here, or say here, that hasn't been felt/said hundreds of times before, by the women I would like to consider my friends. I need to be reminded of that. Daily. The way to do that is by being real. If I'm whining, then by golly I will whine out loud! If I'm depressed, I'll let you see my tears. If I just ate the world, with two stars for dessert, I will crawl in here and tell you what I just did. Because only by telling you all where I really am, can I ask for the gift of your experience, strength, and hope. So Mug, the further you feel like you have fallen, the greater will be the strength you get from picking yourself back up, and the more wisdom you will gain to help the next woman here who feels hopeless. Don't give up before the miracle happens!
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Old 08-20-2007, 01:58 PM   #15
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Mugs- don't go. I, too, am going through something similiar. It doesn't help that TOM is due today- look at my FitDay, and you will see how horrible I've been the past couple of weeks.

I know some of it is due to a huge increase in exercise. I've been walking anywhere from 3-5 miles a day, with jogging/running added in those miles to improve my stamina. You see, I have a goal to play on an indoor soccer team by next fall. First, I have to get at least 100 pounds off as well as get into better shape. I've lost 40 pounds so far, but my stamina isn't good, hence why I am bumping up the walking/jogging/running as well as weight training every other day.

With that, has come an increase in appetite. I told myself I will ride it out for two weeks, then see from there what I can do to stop myself from going crazy like the past couple of days (whenever TOM is due, I crave chocolate- badly!). The one way to ground myself is to keep posting here for support and solutions. Staying away will only hurt me in the long run. I did that last year, and that was a huge mistake.

We all go through this.... finding solutions is the key. Maybe have one day out of the weekend that you can treat yourself to a few extra calories without guilt? I save Sunday's as my day- we usually have a nice dinner and a dessert we wouldn't eat the rest of the week, and it's worked well for us so far. Try juggling your calories around- keep them lower during the weekdays, so you have some to spare on the weekends.

Good luck to you- I know how you're feeling. We have to keep trying, though. Find the positives in your journey, and just keep going. If you slip up, don't fret about it, just move on to the next meal and keep it healthy and do some extra walking to burn off those excess calories.
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