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Ugh my mother in law...

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Old 03-29-2007, 02:58 PM   #1
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Angry Ugh my mother in law...

Ok she just called me to tell me about how my sister in law (her other daughter in law) is getting so big...
she isnt nearly as big as I am..
and how she feels like she is getting fat too.. ok my mother in law MAYBE weighs 100 pounds SOAKING WET...
this woman is a size 4... and she is ALWAYS complaing to me and my sister in law about how fat she is getting...
she drives me crazy...
do yall have any mother in law stories you can share to make me feel better
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Old 03-29-2007, 03:40 PM   #2
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Oooo, oooo, oooo!! Pick me, pick me!!

My MIL is about 5' 1" and thin. She thinks just having bread for dinner is a good thing and she doesn't like to cook, so she really isn't very healthy.
She constantly tells me how she was a "little fatty" when she was in school, through high school, and into college. She talks about how she had trouble with her TOM for years because of how fat she was. (Keep in mind that when you look back at photos of her, she was heavier than she is now, but I would estimate she was probably 140 pounds at that time. She actually looked healthy back then.)
I guess the thing that gets me about her is that she will never mention my weight but feels free to talk behind the back of others about THEIR weight. Her daughter is overweight and likes to square dance. She had the nerve to say that she'd like to watch that because her square dance partner is so fat. "What a sight to see." Keep in mind that her daughter is a very nice person and would do anything to help her mother. I am sure that she feels the need to discuss my weight with other people in the same way. So far, she hasn't slipped up in front of me.
My MIL's brother-in-law has diabetes and really struggles with weight. Yes, I know he hasn't worked on losing it, but she always criticizes him that he is fat and lazy. She never mentions what a nice man he is.

Kind of makes you go GRRRR!
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Old 03-29-2007, 04:28 PM   #3
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Hi Millie. My MIL lives with me...and, she's Bi-polar. Enough said?

I hope no one thinks I'm making light of her diagnosis. Hubby and I have learned that a good sense of humor is the best way of getting through many challenging times. Sometimes, all we can do is laugh about the things she does, then go on.
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Old 03-29-2007, 05:02 PM   #4
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Ok, Rhonda, you win.
Sorry to hear that she (and your family) has to struggle with that.
At least my MIL lives 45 miles away.
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Old 03-29-2007, 05:13 PM   #5
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Being a formerly obese MIL with a petite DIL, I never said a word to her about weight. And my two MILs were both bigger than I was when they were around so no discussion there either. I like reading about MIL stories because it helps me to be a better one.

Actually, I think I'm a pretty good MIL. And I don't talk to my own kids about their weight issues because I certainly know how it felt to be bugged about my weight, but I do occasionally bug my younger son about smoking. Smoking took my Mom's life, my uncle's life, and my SIL's life so I guess I think I'm justified to bug him about something that is known to be a killer in our family.
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Old 03-29-2007, 06:04 PM   #6
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I don't have a MIL.. heck I don't even have a boyfriend but this reminded me of myself anyways.

Slashnl- My sister said something to me last year that stuck with me.. We were in my brothers wedding and were being paired up with who to walk down the aisle with... they were kinda doing it as random. They did not account for height or body weight or anything.. just picking people and making them a pair. I got paired with my sister-in-laws younger cousin who happened to be the skinniest little guy.. and I happened to be the biggest of the girls. My sister says, "they weren't really thinking were they. of all the people they could have put together why would they put you two together. won't that look weird." I was like, "excuse me?! what do you mean by that?" and she basically said because he was the littlest guy and I was fattest chick. Nice.
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Old 03-29-2007, 06:14 PM   #7
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Rhonda... OMG!!!!! I don't think I could ever ever do what you are doing! Wow. May the force be with you!
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Old 03-29-2007, 07:56 PM   #8
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Kae: OMG! People can say the stupidest things. You just have to shake your head sometimes. I'll bet you were just so excited to walk down the aisle after that comment.

It would have been funny if you could have said something about some other difference between you and the skinny boy. Something like, "Gosh I know what you mean! Why would they pair up a blond and a redhead?" (Of course, I would have never been able to think that fast after being thrown off by such a rude comment.)

I guess we can pick our friends, but not our relatives!!
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Old 03-29-2007, 08:13 PM   #9
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I don't have a MIL, but I can share a grandma story

My mom's mom, God bless her skinny soul now in the ether, but she was obsessed with weight. Hers and everybody elses. She was thin, always, ate like a lumberjack, but exercised daily too. Like a size 6 most of her life or less.

Anyways, I got chubby as a teen, and later moved into obesity as an adult. But chubby teen me and her were photographed at Padre Island off south Texas one year, and I came across this pic in my great aunt's (her sister's) photo album in my mid-20s.

I was curious as to when the photo was taken (us on the beach, leaning against a giant rock) -- so I took out the photo in the hope it had the date written or imprinted on the back.

On the back it said, "I'm the skinny one" in my grandmother's handwriting!

And no date.

Thankfully, as she aged, she mellowed out, and totally didn't care about anyone else's fatness. A couple years before she died, I was in Texas visiting her, and my sister came down too... we were waiting in the luggage pick-up area for the suitcases. I was about 190, so at least 30 pounds overweight, and she said to me, "You look good!"

She had recently lost an eye to medical problems, and had a glass eye in the prettiest shade of blue, so I replied "You must be looking at me with your bad eye, Gram." She yukked it up. She was some grandmother. Bet she's looking all mighty fine now... and giving someone in Heaven some backtalk.
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Old 03-30-2007, 06:55 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GirlyGirlSebas View Post
Hi Millie. My MIL lives with me...and, she's Bi-polar. Enough said?
my mother in law is manic depressin ANNNNNNDDDDDDD... . OCD lol yup.. and she calls me crying sometimes just to say she is worried about us.. ugh..
but she is on some good meds now so this is her being NICE... this is the same women who told my sister in law AT THE HOSPITAL that her newborn baby was ugly!!!
(*he was but you dont tell the woman who was in labor for HOURS that he was... you keep that to yourself)
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Old 03-30-2007, 07:32 AM   #11
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My mother has always commented on my unathletic bod. Even when I was a skeletally skinny teen, my "hips were made for easy childbearing". Then later, as I started putting on a little bit of weight, to what others considered healthy, I was "letting myself go to pot", even though I was doing my best to be in shape. The weight kept accumulating, despite diets and exercise, and I became her Fatso kid, stated loudly at any social function. Of course, she's always outweighed me by at least 50 lbs, and is 6 inches shorter, too! So when I married, it was a no-brainer to move 2000 miles away.
I got my own back recently. A few years ago, I lost most all my excess weight, and went home with my 2 girls to get to know their grandma. We couldn't contact or find her until we went into her storefront church, where she was busy trying to impress her then-boss. She didn't recognize us! I had to introduce us to her, in front of everybody, as her daughter and grandkids! And by then, she was pushing 300 lbs herself...
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Old 03-30-2007, 08:16 AM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BerkshireGrl View Post
On the back it said, "I'm the skinny one" in my grandmother's handwriting!
That is terrible!


I have a sweet MIL - I don't always agree with her.. but she is sweet Weight never comes up unless I bring it up. I do give her crap about her smoking. But that's because I love her.

My mother, on the other hand - I remember when I was about 11 and getting a second scoop of ice cream at my aunts and in front of everyone she said - "Dana, you know you are going to have a roll of fat there soon" - thanks Mom. At the time she was about 70 lbs overweight. She sent me to weight watchers - with her. She made me eat fish. I hate fish! I still don't eat fish to this day.

Another time I tried on a pair of pants and my Mom said "if you just lost 5 lbs they would look so much better on you" - gee, thanks Mom.

I could go on... but I won't!
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Old 03-31-2007, 10:52 PM   #13
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Default MIL - Good One!!

Ok first you have to get this connection my cousin is married to my husbands brother, got it?

So my MIL and her sister came to my husband and I and asked if we want to compete against each other who can loose the most weight, have weekly weigh in's etc. We agreed with some delight at the support with some very specific rules one being that the rest of the family should never know in case someone fails and feels badly about it. We agreed.

A month or so later my cousin comes over and asks how we are doing on the competition. She is a very little girl and I was so upset that my MIL had breached the rule. Let's say for me the competition was over. She apologized but the damage was done.
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Old 03-31-2007, 11:53 PM   #14
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I loved my MIL... may she RIP
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Old 04-01-2007, 12:31 AM   #15
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I wish I could have known my MIL. I have been told by everyone who knew her that she was the SWEETEST lady on earth and would do anything for anybody. I believe them, because her son (my wonderful husband) is living proof of the great lady she was. She was probably 350 lbs when she died, so she struggled herself and probably would have never said anything to me about my weight due to her sweet nature and her own struggle with it.

On a side note: I met my husband AT the funeral home when my MIL's body was lying in state. Yep...I had never laid eyes on him, had only heard about him and he had writtem me one letter when I got word his mother had died. So, I traveld 3 hours to be at her funeral and there, at the funeral home, for the first time I saw the man who would end up being my husband. It was a really strange way to meet a 'love' but he is so wonderful, I could have met him in a sewer and it would have made no difference. By the way, I earned some big brownie points with him by coming to the funeral when I didn't even know him. Sorry if this is considered hijacking a thread, but I just love to tell that story because it is so different.
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