Good luck on the scale. OWN that number, whatever it is! Truly know that you are not the heaviest person in the world and begin to lower it!
As for calories, you can check out a lot of the action in the calorie counters forum (Under "Diet Plans"). nearly every day someone asks a question similar to yours. The answers you've received so far here have been great. Calculators are a good starting point, but know that they are simply estimates, as they don't know as much about your metabolism as they would really need to to be really accurate...
My 5 C's of healthy living: Commitment to conscious control, with the understanding that choices have consequences