Darlene;
HANG IN THERE!! I am like you, I feel like a failure and in despair. I am new to this whole dieting thing. I have decided that it's not a diet I want to go on but . . . just eat healthier and be aware of what I'm putting in my mouth, do a bit of exercise (this has always made me feel better). My thinking is if I go on a diet then when my weight is where I want it to be, then I go off the diet, right . . . Well then that's when I figure you gain the weight back. I feel like it's a balancing act, once I reach my goal, I can have an extra snack or two, but I can't just eat junk. I still need to eat healthy and exercise to keep me where I want to be.
It also sounds like you might be bored. It sounds like there is a support system for you, it's just not working. So ask yourself, what exercise do I like to do. Is it a swim in the pool, a walk in the park or the mall (the park works for me, but not the mall, too stuffy) Do I like the treadmill, pilates, yoga, WATP videos, bicycling (I can do the real thing but have a bit of a problem with indoors). Do you like photography??? Buy a digital camera and walk around Korea and take pictures of anything and everything, I would imagine there are tons of things to take pictures of. Maybe not technically exercise, but you'd be walking while you're taking pics. Call someone to go for a walk or better yet walk to their house, if their not home walk back, at least you got in a bit of exercise.
I know you hurt your shoulder and it may take some time to heal but there are other things you can do without your shoulder. Stomach flus can be horrible, but it won't last forever. You'll feel better soon, then you have to decide what YOU want, not your sweetie, or siblings or anyone. You need to decide for you. OK, so you eat healthy, but like a horse. Try to eat like a pony. I have 3:00 issues too. Now you know that you are hungry at 3:00so plan for it. Figure out something, maybe some protien (peanuts, almonds) and maybe a banana (always filling for me) and start eating it just before three. Maybe when you are eating it, take a bit and in your mind describe the taste, texture feel. Then you won't eat it quite so fast. (sometimes works for me) or take a drink of water between each bit and every 2-3 peanuts.
I have been eating about 6 times a day . . . UGH!! but my meals are a bit smaller, much healthier and I am finding out what fills me up and what doesn't. I also eat 1-2 pieces of dark chocolate EVERYDAY, yes chocolate is my weakness. If I were to completely take chocolate out of my life, I think I would just end up eating two or three or four bars of chocolate, so I figure if I have just a little bit everyday then I won't go overboard.
It's hard, I'm not going to pretend it's not, everyday things tempt me, sometimes I win, sometimes they win, but the fact that I am trying keeps me going. So you ate a bunch of cheetos . . . they won this time, next time YOU WILL WIN. Just hang in there either way, if something happens, work around it. Sick, well you can't help that, start when you're better. Hurt shoulder, exercise something that just uses your legs.
I have always been a very ALL or NONE person, but life doesn't work that way and throws you curveballs, sometimes quite often. We all just need to figure out how to work around all the obstacles. (and I feel like there's plenty). I just never new it before because I just kept going, so I'm taking on that attitude again. I'm just going to get going and if something knocks me down, well I am going to pick myself up, or have someone help me up, brush myself off and figure out why that didn't work and head down a different path.
You have lost 12 POUNDS, I think that is amazing. I have only been working on this for about two weeks, (two weeks of eating healthy and one week of exercise) and I am soooooooooo afraid to get on the scale, because I'm afraid I will be disheartend and give up.
Call a friend, e-mail me . . . demand the support you want and need.
YOU DESERVE IT!!!
OK, did I get a bit wordy or what . . . I just don't want you to give up, you're already on your way, just keep going . . . you can make it!!!
HUGS
S. Diane