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To tell friends & Family, or NOT to tell????

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Old 01-05-2007, 10:50 AM   #1
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Default To tell friends & Family, or NOT to tell????

I'm sure a lot of you have been thru this January diet committment thing before, I know I have ~ I get completely and utterly convinced that THIS time, this will be the golden time of my life where I figure everything out and get control over food.

And I share this with friends and family, about how I plan to do A, B and C. and then of course by February I'm back to the old ways. They're all way too nice to say "ummmmmmmmm you're still FAT...why'd you STOP????" LOL

So, even though I know how important support from loved ones is, I'm wondering what people's thoughts are about it????? do you ALWAYS tell them or just go along your merry way and don't make a big issue out of it? I'd hate for them to ever thing "oh lord there she goes again"

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Old 01-05-2007, 10:59 AM   #2
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That is a hard call here too. I have decided that this time I am not on a diet, I am changing my life. So therefore, I am not telling them I am "on a diet". I have not said anything to anyone other than those who I am very close to. I think it will be more fun to see their faces when they see how I look in a few months. I needed a support system, and I made sure I had that in place when I started this journey. Those people are the only ones that need to know my plan!
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:05 AM   #3
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Hi Trazy!

I wondered the same thing, so I didn't say anything to anyone just to see if I WAS going to stay on track! After losing about 15 pounds I had my first person say, "Hey, Cheryl! You are losing weight, girl!" I REALLY was excited because it was a guy I worked with who always "tells it like it is" and NEVER says things just to flatter someone.

That was a HUGE jumpstart for me, and I really got going on my walking and watching what I ate after that comment!

People's comments can have a HUGE impact!

After I had lost 25 pounds MANY people mentioned that I had lost weight, but it was that first comment that really spurred me onward!

My son and his fiancee are athletes. I get a lot of support from them and get a lot of tips from them, too, especially with healthy eating.

In my opinion,I guess my answer to you would be to NOT give any hateful, unsupportive individuals any ammunition that they can use against you. If you have supportive people then go for it! Supportive people can really boost you up and keep you motivated. Unsupportive/envious/snotty people can really bring you down and can head you down the road to emotional eating. I know!

Good luck! You can do this!

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Old 01-05-2007, 11:22 AM   #4
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My inlaws and parents knew...and a few of my very close friends. As people started to notice the weight loss I would tell them I have been on a diet...
It took a long time before anyone really noticed my weight loss. My husband and I both lost weight.. Most everyone noticed his way before mine...
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:27 AM   #5
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I didn't say anything for the first month for the exact reasons you mentioned. Then they noticed on their own...
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:34 AM   #6
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I didn't tell my relatives until I'd already lost quite a bit. They saw me and started asking questions. Then, I told them. I didn't want to deal with the negativity. I couldn't bare to hear them say "OH, you've tried a million times to lose weight and it never works". My DH and kids did know from the start but they hadn't seen me try to lose weight before.
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:34 AM   #7
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I've always told my family when I'm on a "diet" and since I never succeed,they bring it up and I'm left looking like a failure and an idiot. This time,I haven't said anything except my mom and I'm sure she's told a few relatives that I'm on a "diet" but the thing is I am not only planning on losing weight,I wanna change my whole life. This is a transformation--a lifestyle change. So she can call it a diet if she wants,but I know this is something that will affect the rest of my life. It's about my health. Honestly,I don't think I would've cared as much if it was just about getting rid of fat. Yes,I wanna get rid of fat but I want to be healthy more than anything. I don't wanna struggle to breathe and run out of breath after walking for a few minutes anymore. I wanna run a marathon someday! Only I can bring forth any changes in my body because it is MY body,my temple,and nobody else is responsible for it. So if I don't do anything for it,I'm screwed. I want to keep living in this temple (my body) for as many years as I possibly can and I'm on my way to making it happen. Eventually my family will notice a change and if they ask,I'll then explain about my lifestyle change and how I finally decided it was time and all that good stuff they'd wanna know. Good luck on your journey!
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:40 AM   #8
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I keep it too myself. I've failed for 30yr so don't talk about it anymore unless asked.
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:44 AM   #9
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Everybody knows...I've not kept it a secret. For the most part, my family is incredibly supportive. I'm sure there are those who are thinking "Yeah, I've heard this before!"....but, you know what....I really don't care. This is for me. As long as you arent avoiding telling anybody because you want to give yourself an "out.".....you know, "if nobody knows I was on a diet, it doesnt matter if I quit"...then I dont think it really matters if you tell them or not. If you think they will try to sabotage you or bring you down and that will hinder your progress, then you might want to keep quiet. You can always talk about it with us.
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Old 01-05-2007, 11:50 AM   #10
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When I started back at WW, my husband, my sisters and my kids are the only ones I mentioned it to. They are all very supportive. My husbands family never says much and are not very encourging at all. I was so annoyed when I was loosing well before I said something about WW to my size 3 SIL, her reply was "Oh is that working for you?". I had lost 50 lbs at that point and most people were noticing without my saying anything. I don't need that type of respond so I just don't say much to those I know are not supportive.
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Old 01-05-2007, 12:26 PM   #11
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I haven't told anyone I'm on a diet, because I'm not. I've changed my habits permanently. Actually, one of my coworkers asked me today if I was dieting and I told him no, but I am eating healthy. Everyone knows that I have changed my diet, though. I would only tell people that would be supportive. "I can't eat that" works really well for those that wouldn't be (or "I'm allergic to that").
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Old 01-05-2007, 12:26 PM   #12
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I also didn't tell anyone this time around. Only my mom knew that I was seeing a dietician and trying to eat better. When people started noticing, I thanked them and if they asked me I would tell them I was working on it. It definitely worked better that way for me.
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Old 01-05-2007, 12:34 PM   #13
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I would only tell those immediate people living in my household. That is whose support you really, really need. Like ummm, no bringing any junk into the house. You don't need people scrutinizing everything you do. They will catch on soon enough when they seeing you dropping the weight!!!!
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Old 01-05-2007, 12:40 PM   #14
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Sharon...
My SIL is the same way.. She was always very thin and had a remake about every ones weight and butt size.. I have lost 95 lbs and still she has not said a word.. She herself is now getting on the heavy side.. SHE CANT SEE THAT EITHER....
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Old 01-05-2007, 01:10 PM   #15
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I stopped telling people outside of my household when our receptionist appointed herself the Office Food Cop. (She also made fun of me for, of all things, riding my bike, so she's just evil anyway.)

That was a year or so ago. Now, I just make sure the Other Human is on board. If he blabs to the judgmental people in HIS family, I'm going to try very hard to make it Not My Problem.
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