270
I had gone up 3 pounds, and lost those, then down to 268 — then up to 270. This is not the scale’s fault; it’s mine. I haven’t been on plan. This month’s excuse? Horrific joint pain that moves around from ankles to hands to elbows to fingers. It’s getting better. I “started again” April 1st, and again last Sunday. And so tomorrow…..
I had an eye doctor’s appointment today, a follow up on catarract surgery. Even though the operation was just six months ago, I’m beginning to build catarracts again. The technician very nicely told me to watch the sugar. (I’d read this once, that too much sugar causes catarracts.) I was miffed, as I don’t have high blooc sugar. Because of my weight, medical people routinely assume that I’m diabetic, and I’m not. Then the doctor came in and also noted that there was the beginning of new catarracts. “How’s your weight?” he asked. (I don’t think his eyes are cloudy…..)
My GP downplayed my weight — pretty much ignored it — the first two years I saw her. She now mentions it very gingerly. I have lost 40 pounds, but I’ve been gaining and losing the same 5 pounds for the past two years. I’m getting to the point where it’s starting to matter, more than just being an embarrassment. I have to do this now.
I’ve had more trials and tribulations since January: first, a two-week period late in the month where I hadI chronic insomnia for more than 2 weeks. Just as that was easing, I began to feel pain in the left foot. I hadn’t injured it, but it began to swell, and for the next week, by the end of the day it was asbout three times normal size. I’ve had edema before — about 8 years ago — and I thought it might be the same thing. I saw the nurse at school who said I had a strong pulse and not to worry, but to check in with the doctor at spring break. Then my hands and wrists became very stiff — intermittently. One day I could not make a fist with my right hand. The next day it was fine, but the left elbow hurt. The foot/ankle began to get better. And lo, the very first day of spring break I woke up and it was about 95%, just a bit of stiffness and swelling late in the day. Coincidence?
I’m beginning to believe that all my trials and tribulations in the past two years have been stress related. I’ve been working at home for the past few days, and it’s the first break I’ve had in over a year and a half. I’m beginning to feel human.
Back up to 273. I’ve had two weeks with a very swollen left ankle and pain in hands and wrists. It’s just easing now. I’ve bounced between 269 and 274, and weighed 273 this morning.
267
I can’t explain why, but I’m down another pound. I FEEL as though I’m down a pound, which is unusual. I’m also down two underwear sizes. I can’t quite believe this. I have not weighed 267 in this century!!! I don’t know exactly when I weighed 267. I hit 269 for about a day in August of 1998, and I weighed 260 in January of 1996, so it’s been awhile.
Today’s plan:
Breakfast: smoothie and Fiber One bar
Lunch: tuna sandwich, apple
Snack: Activia, banana
Dinner: WW meatloaf and mashed potatoes, at least a cup of frozen vegetables
health note: mouth and throat problems still clear
268.2
After a few days of very bad…indigestion? stomach flu? extreme IBS? I’m restarting WW-working-towards-South-Beach. I’m very humbled by the past few weeks of extreme, absolutely ridiculous plan hopping, during which time I stuck to no plan longer than a day and a half. I go from wanting to find something that will take off 3 pounds a week, to more sober assessments, where I’m happy to lose a pound a week.
True to form, this day was not ideal, but I did NOT hit the snack machine! Once again, my goals are:
1. plan in the sense of sticking to the points target
2. stick to plan
3. journal
4. NO JUNK FOOD
5. meet healthy guidelines
6. walk
7. work on food choices, eliminating processed foods
8. START SOUTH BEACH
I’m going to conquer that plan. I am. I need a week or two of clean eating, get my head away from “eat 1200 calories a day (the old WW exchange plan) PLUS all those extra points/calories they give you so that you stay on WW forever.”
I’ve left up the past few posts, instead of deleting them, which is what I usually do when I’m plan hopping. It shows how serious I am about it, and how ridiculous. While I was plan dithering and plan hopping, something quite odd happened.
I’ve been plagued off and on since June 2009 with odd mouth inflammations, mostly on the inside lower lip, and since August 2011 with an even odder sensation, when I swallow food or drink, of discomfort in the throat and the nerves in my back, sometimes up the back of the head. I haven’t been able to find a cause or cure. I raised it with my doctor in late August and she said, sounds like acid reflux, which I’ve never had. She prescribed Prevacid, which did nothing.
Last Saturday, it stopped. Read the rest of this entry »
What do I need to do to make this work?
Plan.
Breakfasts — Atkins diet shake OR — new idea! — eat breakfast at school. This may be dangerous, as they always have some kind of eggs, but they also have an oatmeal bar. It would be best to wait until Phase 2 for this. I’ll see.
Lunches — at school. SALAD BAR. They have a wonderful salad bar. They also nearly always have cold cuts. The plan is to take dressing, make a salad of vegetables, add the protein. Perhaps add the dressing, perhaps not — their cold vegetables usually include green beans, some other type of bean, beets, mushrooms.
Snacks -
at school: hummus and veg
at home after school. AHA! The danger zone. I hope, if I have eaten a large enough lunch, and the hummus and veg, that I will not be ravenous when I get home. The plan: a cheese stick. 2 cheese sticks.
Dinner:
Soup and salad. I bought a few boxed, natural soups (cream of broccoli, cream of mushroom) and packaged salads. The letter, if not the spirit, of SB. I can’t say I don’t have time to open a box of soup and, while it is cooking, open a packaged salad, wash and dry the greens, and dump on some dressing. Even I am not so lazy I can’t do soup and salad.
Dessert: ricotta cream, either vanilla or lemon
Why is this so hard? This is not hard. If you cannot do this, what business do you have running an academic program and a magazine???
This is such a STUPID pattern. Decide to do SB. Have a great day re-reading the book, menus posted on forums, cookbooks. Make a plan. Make a shopping list. Be really PSYCHED. Go shopping. Buy the food.
Go home. Think, I cannot get through this week with this food.
Call Peapod. Order: Fiber One bars, Honest Tea, Stonyfield yogurt smoothies.
Stay pretty much on plan.
Have a Really Bad Day. Stop at the snack machine.
Go wild. Make the next week’s shopping list. Order bread, rolls, pasta, rice. On which I will have butter.
Brakes on.
Back to Plan A — or Plan SB.
STOP THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tomorrow, I have a lovely country drive planned. Then grocery shopping, some cooking (!!!!).
I was on the beach for the shopping. Again. As soon as I was home, I sat down, thought through the week (about the fifth time, just for this week) and came to the conclusion that I would not carry through. Again. I’ve decided to keep that first post, because I may well need it again!
Several things happened. One, I lost two pounds last week on Weight Watchers — and it had not been a good week. Two, I do not want to throw away 8 bottles of tea, a loaf of bread, a box of Fiber One bars, and several Stonyfield smoothies, a box of cereal, and milk. Again. Three, I looked ahead at the week’s menu and every lunch I hate. They are going vegetarian at school, it seems, and everything is very carby. Black bean burritos, veggie burgers, etc. I will have to take lunch, and that will be mostly sandwiches.
And so now I’m back at WW. For now.