Irish Dance Dance Revolution

So… I keep this silly phrase in my head “It’s all because I’m not thin” … And I honestly don’t know why.  There are people bigger than me who are AMAZING dancers because they work out, on their own, how to do it.  

I blame my knee problem, which is actually a pretty legitimate problem: I was out of dance for about 2-3 months?  So that’s time that my muscles had to deflate, my mind had to get fuzzy, and my body had to get out of shape.  

But, still, for some reason, I seem to think that all of my talent is buried underneath these layers of fat..

I HONESTLY think I would be able to jump higher if I weren’t so heavy– but there’s also the strength issue that goes with “holding” those jumps.  But– It seems so backward.  Maybe not.  lol  It’s just that, I know that as I’m losing weight, I’m working to GET stronger, so when I am at goal, I’ll have the strength I need to do the dancing at the caliber that I expect.  

But instead of thinking “I want the process to be done so that I can reap the benefits of my hard work”, I think, “I’ll be able to do that if I was thin”.  

And I KNOW it’s wrong, and backwards, and not ALL true– but…  grr.  lol

There’s really no point to this post, I’m just venting.

So I went pumpkin picking with Joanna and Aleyna (sp??) yesterday, and we carved pumpkins

Once again, I blamed my bad eating, not on the copious amounts of candy corn I shoved in my mouth, but on the last tiny tiny slice of pizza I ate.  (lol healthy day.. healthy day..)

Anyways– I carved Raul the Destroyer and Henry the Eaten yesterday- I’m so stoked with how it turned out!!!

However, ripe pumpkin seeds do not grow in green pumpkins, and that’s what I was looking forward to most  A nice healthy snack, and a fun bit of “art” for my living room.. *sigh* c’est la vie!

I’m so ubar amused right now…

I like how I blame my overage of calories on the last thing I ate, not on the poor choices I made earlier that day… Like today– I’m thinking of having a fruit cup (probably about 140 cals) but that would put me 100 over for my day… :P 

And what would I blame for putting me over?

You guessed it! My uber healthy fruit cup *sigh* So it goes

So my brakes gave out on me on Thursday night after a HIGHLY stressful day….  (I got lost going to the simplest of places, and ended up in SODO somehow…)

Friday was JUST as stressful–driving my boyfriends car home from work: It broke down on me on the I-405/I-5 interchange…  so there I am on the freeway (LESS than a mile from home!!)  sitting.. waiting for his car to restart.  *sigh*

Anyways– So I decided to take my car into Les Schwab to get my brakes and tires fixed.. and I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this yet–but I’m 23, living with my boyfriend and cat, and we have minimal money to spend on every-day expenses, let alone brakes and new tires.  But the ugly cycle continues: Need to work to pay for the car, need the car to get to work….  GRRR… So I fronted the *gulp* $1,000+ to get everything fixed… I got there at 12:45p… and didn’t LEAVE until 7:15.  

WITHOUT MY CAR!!

The calipers weren’t right for my car, and they couldn’t run to the store to get the right ones, since the stores were closed.  So now I’m out a grand, and a car.  *sigh*  

ALSO they’re not open tomorrow….  So I have to wait until MONDAY to get my car back!  …  They open at 8am, I work at 10am….  I need to leave no later than 9:30 in order to get to work on time.. so– the manager SAID it would be ready for me by 8:30-9:00…  We shall see.  So help me god, if I have to drive my boyfriend’s car again, I’m going to scream.  *sigh*  I just hope this works.  

To top it all off… I didn’t make the WISEST of choices today–so I’ve got terrible heartburn, which I know a smoothie would fix…  but… I’m 6 calories over my daily goal *GASP* lol I know.. 6 CALORIES! (earth shattering..)  And PROBABLY 100 or so calories for a decent smoothie wouldn’t kill me… but.. *sigh* We’ll see.  It’s 10p and I’d like to get to sleep soon.

I just hope this week continues on a better note than last week ended.  I swear, and did since January– This year is NOT my year.  And I don’t mean to be negative about it–but a lot of terrible things have been happening this year… and not really world-ending bad, but annoying and “trying on my patience”…  Money, Cars, Trips, Illness, Injuries.. and the list continues. (but not here.)

I’ve been trying to make the best of all of the situations: I changed doctors when my cat became ill from negligence from her last vet; I’ve kept up on my dance classes and students have been fantastic despite my knee injury; I’ve found ways to pay for things that we need.. even though we don’t have the money.  *sigh*

I promise one day soon I’ll have a positive post  Maybe Jan 1, 2009.

So… I know I shouldn’t complain.  After all, I’ve “broken” the plateau.  (I guess..)  Week 2 of 169.8.  *sigh* New plateau, perchance?  I mean–REALLY I’m ok with it, because I’m out of the 170’s… But I’m just afraid the same thing is going to happen with Christmas that will happen with Halloween– I set this (pretty minor) goal, and I can’t reach it because I’m STUCK!!!

I WANT to say that the reason I’m stuck is because I’m not exercising enough… half of me thinks this is true.. the other half– not so much.  (at least I’m split evenly, right?)

So–I dance.  a lot.  I put a lot of effort into my classes… But since my knee is injured (and my other one is starting to feel funny from a previous injury.. *sigh*), I’m having a lot of trouble moving.  Elliptical Machines are out of the question because I get light-headed and “faint-y”.  I can’t run, because it’s too much pressure on my knees.  I can’t do stairs.. again, the knee thing.  

I am going to venture into the Aerobics world– but almost every video I’ve encountered (tae-bo, Richard Simmons, Exercise TV) has some sort of “twisting” motion in it–which messes with my injury.  It’s like the only thing I’m able to do are the full-speed Irish Dances!  

Anyhoo– So the other half of me KNOWS how much I “dance” during my classes (that I teach)–and mostly, I’m trying to conserve energy (since it’s 5 hours straight) so that I can get through my last class.  And, yes, I have my leg-energy conserved so that I CAN dance with my last class… but I’m SO mentally exhausted, that just teaching seems to suffice.  

I feel like if I added in more cardio and yoga or pilates, that I would be able to break this plateau… because there’s REALLY only so far healthy eating will take you.

P.S.– I’ve done SO GOOD on eating lately!! This week– I’m 20 calories under my daily goal (average based on 1 weeks worth of eating)  I’m SO excited  

Well, I’ve set some goals for myself– fairly small ones, actually.  I see others being (reasonably!) ambitious and doing 2lb/week weight loss goals– And while I would LOVE to lose that kind of weight, I know that it’s just not in the stars for me right now….

Ever since becoming vegetarian, I’ve been on a massive plateau.  I have been 170-173 for the past 3 months.  And I’m totally fine with that–but ready to lose  I think the main reason I plateaued is because I wasn’t counting calories, or tracking, at all, for that matter…  

So I’m tracking on The Daily Plate– Loving it, of course, and I even have an accountabilibuddy to keep me in line.  I know that she checks my food at least once a day, and it really helps to think “Ok, do I REALLY need to go over my calorie goals for the day?  I didn’t exercise, so why should I eat an extra chocolate square tonight?  Someone’s watching!!!”  hehe

So– goals.  

I would really like to be consistently in the 160’s by Halloween.  I’ve been hovering between 169.4-170 all week… and I’m hoping beyond hope that this is the start of “breaking the plateau”– but I don’t want to get prematurely excited!!!  

My original goal was to be 162 by halloween.  Barely breaking 169, I don’t see this happening in 2 weeks time.  So, consistency in the 160’s will suffice

I just joined a challenge thread “Christmas Goal Setting”– and I’m setting a rather conservative goal.  I would like to lose 10lbs in 10 weeks.  If I just work my way through the 160’s through the holidays, that would be so fantastic!  If I happen to see 159 on Christmas morning, that would be quite a gift  

I think another reason my goals are quite a bit more conservative is because I can’t exercise much.  I had a knee injury in May that has tweaked out the back of my right knee..  I’ve been doing a lot of rehab for it, but twisting (there’s a LOT of this motion in cardio workouts) is out of the question.   I LOVE pilates, but I lost my Pilates for Dummies DVD earlier this year…  I just need to hunker down and buy it… (once I have the money!!)

It’s so strange, because I can teach Irish Dance, as well as do show choreographies (although the technique has definitely hit a snag..!), but regular things, like ballet, jogging, jump rope… can’t do.  Hurt my knee too much. *sigh*  Oh well.. it’ll all fit together one day

So for now, I’m watching my calories, averaging 1600 (working to average 1580 next week) and hopefully that will make some progress!!!

Hi All!

Well, I used to have a diet blog (with the same name) but I think it was lost in the upgrade… and actually, that’s ok with me  This is a journey, and sometimes you don’t need to do more than recap, right?

Weightloss Journey:

I started THIS journey on December 31, 2007.  I don’t want to have a “new years diet”, so I figured I would start before the new year  This way it’s not going to be a “fad” that I’ll fall off the wagon for.

I’ve been “dieting” since I was 8.  *sigh*  yeah.  I used to be TINY… I was small for my age, as well as skinny.  I don’t know about healthy, but I was thin at one point!  Then I met Twinkies and Bear Bites (anyone remember those?  THAT didn’t last long!! It was like a dingdong with a bite taken out of it.. lol).  I would sneak bites of sweets while my parents were asleep, eat TONS of fried and salty things!

When I was 8, I hit 130, and I was SO happy with myself because I was actually heavy enough to lower the hydraulics seat in my parents’ office!  Then I realized how uncomfortable I was… I was bigger than any of my friends, I had weird crooked teeth… *sigh* I was awkward.  

When I was 9, my parents divorced, and on one of my first “overnighters” with my dad, I started my period.  (crazy how hormones and weight affect you hitting puberty early!)  And you’d think that I would “grow” into my body… but I just kinda grew.  I had BOOBS….  and not little boobs..  I had D’s by 10.  But I also had a tummy, and VERY low self-esteem.

So I was 160 from about 10-17– I grew into my body, but I didn’t really know what I had when I had it, because for some reason I attract best friends who should be super models!!! (no resentment!)  My doctors had me go on “salad only” diets more than once– but my hatred of salad, and my mom’s inability to force me to eat them never made them very successful.  (Oddly enough, salads are one of my FAVORITE foods now!  Thanks, Mom, for not traumatizing me!)

When I was 16, I lost some weight when I started dating “this guy”… I’m still not really sure how, but I know it wasn’t healthy.  I don’t know how much I lost, or even how little I weighed… but it doesn’t matter because I wasn’t strong enough to dance.  Then I gained it all back (and then some!) after I broke up with “that boyfriend”.

When I started dating Evan, the love of my life, at 17 we ate out at Wendy’s almost every day we got together– He could drive, too, so there went my exercise! Anyhoo– I skyrocketed up to 185.  ALL of my senior pictures are of me at my biggest *sigh* which is depressing, but also really neat that I have this body everyone remembers me by, and I know I won’t be that size again.

I joined Weight Watchers, with my mom, at 18 and lost 35lbs in less than 9 months.  I didn’t really apply any of the “healthy eating” aspects… as I didn’t REALLY get it, and I was at a rebellious time of my life  But I lost the weight anyways, and I felt really good!  I looked great, I felt great, and I was truly happy with the outside, as well as inside, for the first time in my life  

Then Evan and I moved out with each-other in September of 2005, and I maintained at 150 until about January of 2007.  Then slowly, I crept up to 170, and I tried WW again.. to no avail.  (I lost 5lbs the first week, then gained it (plus some!) in the next month or so..)  It was just too hard to do: Both by myself, and on my limited budget.  (Things ARE easier when Mom can pay for it, huh??)

So on to this “diet”.  I’ve learned a lot about myself in this past 10 months– a lot about what does/doesn’t work, what I can/can’t do to maintain, and what does/doesn’t motivate me!  

I started trying Weight Watchers, yet again.. and yet again– I lost 5lbs in the first week, then gained it back, and maintained.  We have VERY little money for me to be spending on meetings, let alone healthy foods–so I did what I could, cut back, and tried my best!  My main goal was to be 160-SOMETHING by St. Patrick’s Day!  I managed to make my goal– I was 167.4 on St. Patrick’s Day weekend.  :)  It was hard, but totally worth it!  I had energy to spare while doing my dances!

After St. Patrick’s Day, I didn’t have a goal in mind anymore, so I lost a little motivation, which meant I gained back a few pounds.  I was tired of counting points, tired of feeling hungry, and mostly tired of feeling tired.  :(  So I started Calorie Counting.  This worked FABULOUSLY.  I also had a new “goal”– to be in shape for the Highland Games in August (again in the 160s).  So, basically, for 5 months I plateaued myself.   Then after August, I stopped counting.  (the why is next!)

In early August, I sat down and had a hard think about my diet, my activity levels, and other things.  I began to realize that I don’t like meat.  I can’t digest it–when I eat it (including poultry, red meat, etc) I get tired, I don’t want to do ANYTHING, and I just laze about because all of my energy is going to digesting this meat.  So I decided at that point to become vegetarian.  When I started, I was at 174ish, and I lost about 5 lbs in the first week, then slowly I gained back, and hit a plateau between 170-173.  I stopped counting calories, and just ate until I was satisfied.  I mostly wanted to explore the newfound cuisine that is: Vegetarian.  

I realized that it’s better for athletes to be vegetarian because it provides better fuel (when done correctly) than a carnivorous diet.  More than this, though, I realized that my body utilizes this diet better than one with meat, and that, in the long run, is better for me!  

So, Starting October 3rd, I have tracked my food on The Daily Plate, I have tracked my weight on WiiFit, and have started a good thing, I think.  I’m finally listening to my body.  I’m eating when I’m hungry, stopping when I’m satisfied, trying something different if I need more nutrients, and tracking my exercise

My Dance Story:

I have been dancing since I was little: Ballet, mostly.  When I was 12 I ventured into the world of Irish Dance.  I started with a wonderful teacher who taught me a lot of fabulous basics that have (mostly) stayed with me through the years!  I took a break for about a year, when school, life, and more, got to be too much, and I needed to put the energy I put into dance into everything else.  

I didn’t stop practicing at home, though, and when we realized that there were lessons closer by, we jumped on the chance for me to take them!  I danced with this instructor for quite a few years.  Then, when I was 18, she went to teach at another location, and I was offered to take over that location.  I’ve been teaching there ever since!  

In August 2007, I merged with another school– and it was the best thing I’ve done so far.  We have 75 students (and growing!) and we’re looking SO good.  The personal, professional, and dance-related growth that has come from this union is just so exciting!  

And so it continues: I’m working on creating a better self, not only for me, but for Evan, and our lives together.  We’ve been together for 6 years (Sept 2008), and I couldn’t be more thrilled  We’re working on bettering our lives for each-other, and part of that, for me, at least, is weight loss.  I don’t want to feel the same way I felt our senior year in our wedding pictures…  I don’t want to look the same way I do now when I dance.  And even though I’m not completely happy with my weight, and the physical issues that come from it: I’m making changes.  Slow… yes… Healthy… Yes  Permanent?  HOPEFULLY!!!  (well, at least until I start poppin’ out babies, right??)

Anyways– I’m super stoked to have a new blog  And I hope everyone out there in 3FC land is doing great!

~Kat

S: 185.2/C: 169.8/G: 135(ish)