Tired
I hate being tired…I feel like I am always tired lately, no matter how much or how little I sleep. I think, or hope, it’s the adjustment to a new role and a lot going on right now, but it seems perpetual. I won’t go to the doctor which is what one friend suggested. She will, as always, tell me that if I lose weight everything will be better. At one point, I felt like that was her solution for everything and it didn’t seem possible that everything that was wrong is because I’m fat…but, I’m coming to the reality check…yes, it is. When I was at a lower weight, I didn’t have most of these problems, headaches yes, but not as frequent…but everything else…not really…the only thing I that is better now is bruising…I bruise less, but I’m thinking that’s because my fat covers the spots and access to the veins to bruise me with. So, maybe when I lose this ton of weight that I am carrying, I can really see if anything is wrong.
On another note, watching The Biggest Loser last night motivated me yet again. When some of these folks weight less than me, it makes me want to scream and figure out a way onto the show. I mean, give me 30 days with Bob and Jillian…I’d love it…afterwards at least. But since that’s not likely, I’ll work with what I’ve got…I’m already starting to plan out my routine starting 9/25 and what pitfalls (like gatherings, football games, work events, etc) I’ll need to plan gym time around. I think I’ll have goals set too for smaller targets…5 at a time, new charms each time and will get there…
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