the unskinny girl

Just another 3fatchicks.com weblog

Oh the comments April 30, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 8:43 am

Ok,I’m glad that I’ve lost weight and that it is noticeable. However,i hate getting the 20 questions. This weekend I went to my friends sons birthday party. As I was walking up to the Party,my friends mom,didn’t say hi,didn’t ask how I was doing. All she said was “what did you do?” ok really? That’s the first incomplete sentence out of your month. What did you do? So I asked her,what do you mean? What did I do? She replies with,you’ve lost a lot of weight,what are you doing? Then I have to go into this long spiel about weight watchers and how it works,and how long I’ve been on it. Then I always get asked what my goal weight is,and I honestly don’t have one. Which people think is weird. I know that this is just going to keep happening to me. Which I know is a good thing,it’s just some people take it over the top. In my last blog I talked about my body shape and how if I had a different type of body shape I would look a lot thinner. Well,my friend told me her weight this weekend and she is exactly the same weight I am. I never would’ve guessed it! She looks at least 40-50 pounds lighter than I do. We’re also the same height! Because I carry everything in my waist I look way larger than her. I asked her what size pants she wears. She wears a 14. I wear an 18 now. For all you ladies out there who carry your weight in your hips and thighs,embrace them!!!!!! Cause it makes all the difference in the world where you carry your weight!

 

The highs and lows…. April 27, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 8:54 pm

Seriously,there are so many highs and lows when you lose weight. I’ve had a lot of highs and lows lately. My last high was when I fit into pants at old navy. But for the rest of this week I’ve been low…. My weight loss really is a lot slower than it used to be,and I think that is really starting to annoy me. I think im just anxious to see what my body is gonna look like on the next ten pounds lost,and the next after that,and so on. I tell ya,if I was blessed with a different body shape,my weight loss would seem a lot more dramatic. I carry every single fricken pound in my belly. I look at my belly and it is always there staring at me and taunting me. I’m actually jealous of people who have big hips,thighs and legs.i have a friend who is 3 inches shorter than me,and 50 pounds heavier than me,and she wears pants smaller than me. That just seems crazy to me. She carries all of her weight in her lower half of her body. Where as mine is all in the mid section. So it has taken a long time for me to even make a dent in my waist size. I think my first 40 pounds only came off my face arms and legs. Maybe the last 20 has affected my waist size. Blah! Don’t get me wrong,I certainly am seeing a difference now,but I wish it were a little more targeted in that area. I’m not super distressed about it,I just wish my belly was a little smaller,in proportion to the rest of my body!

 

They fit they fit!!!!! April 21, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 3:59 pm

So I finally broke down and went shopping today. It’s very difficult to go shipping when you have no clue what size you are anymore. I found a pair of pants a couple of weeks ago. But I really needed some shirts,and maybe another pair of pants. Now,I have always been able to get shirts at old navy. But the pants have never been close to fitting me. Oddly enough,I didn’t see any shirts I liked at old navy. But I fit into their pants! Regular store pants. I understand that old navy does carry plus size clothing. But I’ve never been able to get into pants. To be honest,the 18’s were a little big! But the 16’s were to small. I feel like my whole world of buying pants has opened up now. Seriously,I’ve always been limited to wal-mart. So I bought a pair of jeans from old navy! I was so excited! I managed to find several shirts at wal-mart. Which is weird,I never find shirts at wal-Mart. Usually only pants. I generally don’t like the looks of the shirts at wal-Mart. But,I got lucky today. I think it finally has sunk in today,that I have in fact lost 60 pounds. It’s amazing that it takes fitting into a pair of pants to figure that out. I caught my reflection in some windows and mirrors while out shopping. I couldn’t believe how different my reflection looked. Why has this only sunk in now. I should be really proud of myself. Although I have a long ways to go with my weight. I should applaud myself for getting this far,and not be so hard on myself for not losing as much as i used to. I’m still losing and I can really tell that now. So I should be happy with things from here on!

 

Doing a little better today April 19, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 11:35 am

Geeze,I just read over my last post and I was certainly a little cranky that day. The blogging certainly helped though. My weight still can’t decide on whether it wants to be 219 or 220. I would love to just be permanently settled into the teens! You know what I mean? When your far enough into a certain weight bracket that your normal body fluctuation won’t take you out of your latest weight bracket. For me,216 would be a comfortable weight where I know my fluctuations won’t take me into the 220’s again. I want to be done with the 220’s forever!!!! I don’t really have a lot to talk about today. Sorry folks. So I hope you all have a great day!

 

I feel gross today April 17, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 10:32 am

I seriously feel like I haven’t lost anything,ever today. I feel gross and disgusting. I feel like I’ve eaten too much already today. I had half a cup of oatmeal for breakfast. Then I snacked on some leftover pork tenderloin. Why? Because it was in the fridge. It was maybe 3-4 ounces,but still unnecessary. Then I had a WW meal for lunch. It all totals up to about 15 points. It’s rare that I’ve had this many points at this point in the day. I’ve been struggling with old eating disorder habits that haven’t crept back into my life in a LONG time. I’m blogging right now,so that I can get this out with writing instead of throwing up. My stomach is also still giving me issues,so purging probably isn’t a great idea. My period is usually the time when I struggle with feelings of purging the most. Mostly because of the bloating and feeling gross I assume. I logically know that purging gets me nowhere. I did that for over a decade an I lost not a pound. So it does not work for me! I think I’m only figuring out now,that purging is more of a control issue and a stress issue with me. It’s also a weight issue as well,obviously. But when I look back at all the times I have had episodes. It’s usually when there is something going on in my life. It all started when my parents separated when I was young. And that behavior has stayed with me for life. I’m thinking this month it’s been dealing with the fact that we’ve bought a new house,had a miscarriage,thought I was pregnant again,and now have my period. I don’t have control over my period,or the miscarriage and I think this strong urge to purge is a result of all these things combined. Nevermind,the fact that my weight has been stuck in the 220’s for almost 2 months. I haven’t had a day where I feel this down and shitty,in a while. I know it will pass. Probably when my period is over. I just feel like I’ve made a lot of bad choices today. I know what I’m having for supper and I will not be over points today if I stick with the original plan. So I shouldn’t be so hard on myself right now. I need to not purge!!! I hate this feeling more than anything. It’s a battle with myself. It’s like the devil and the angel on my shoulder. Do it… Purge you will feel sooooo much better. No don’t do it,you know better than this,it helps nothing. The internal dialogue is enough to drive me crazy. Hence the reason I’m blogging it out right now. Sorry to bore you all with this excessively whiney blog! I just really needed to do this instead of purging. Enough time has passed that at this point,my food has well digested. So my method of distraction has worked!

 

Whoa! That was unexpected April 16, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 4:41 pm

I knew my weight wouldn’t stay at 219… What I didn’t know,was my weight would go up by 6 pounds this morning!!!! Yup… 225. Other than drinking,I didn’t make any mistakes of that magnitude this weekend. I need to keep in mind,I got my first period since my miscarriage yesterday afternoon. So I’m assuming there are all kinds of bloating going on. Just a little frustrating. The 220’s have by far been the hardest to get out of for me. I’m still following everything properly. I’m not nearly as rigid as I used to be. I think I need to hammer downthis week for sure,so that once my period is gone,I can get back on track. this period is taking its toll on me. I’m so exhausted,all I wanted was to stay in bed today. I’ve also had this crazy pain in my stomach all day. Not cramps,but a deep pain,like I’m literally starving to death,or have to poop. It’s hard to tell the difference. I’m thinking maybe I’m a little backed up,hence the weight gain. If that weight doesn’t go down after my period is done,I will be freaken furious. It’s been a really rough few weeks for me. ¬†With the miscarriage and then not knowing when my period will come again. I became obsessed with testing for pregnancy this month. I need to relax. I feel so much better that I can now start fresh this month. Now that I’ve actually had a cycle we have a starting point and I’m not left wondering when my cycle is gonna come,or when to test for pregnancy. I’m glad to just start fresh and leave the rest behind.

 

Hit the 2-teens today! April 15, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 10:04 am

I have finally hit 219! I know this number won’t last,but it was wonderful to see this morning. I had one of those odd night last night where I only had a handful of drinks,and it didn’t sit well so I threw up a few times. It was very strange. I never get that drunk off 5 drinks. It was very very strange. So hence the low weight this morning. Lol I’ll take it even though it won’t last! I’m hoping it might. But I realize my stomach was very empty this morning,and I was probably very very dehydrated. Ridiculous! I seriously never get that drunk. Not on purpose anyways. It was also a family function that this happened at. I’m even more well behaved in a family situation. So it was just a mess for me. My mommy had to drive me and my husband home. Lol I felt like an idiot. Although I don’t think my mom realized to what extent I was drunk. Anyways. Just a quick blog today. We shall see how my weight is tomorrow!!!!

 

It seems Easter got ahold of everyone! April 10, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 11:34 am

As I’m reading through all your wonderful blogs,it seems most of us really fell off the wagon this weekend! The funny thing is,my Easter gathering was the least of my problems. Our house was a revolving door this weekend. My cousin wanted to come down for a visit this weekend. Yea…. He ended up staying over for 2 days. On top of that we had several other friends come over as well. I know my husband and I are awesome and all,but geeze,everyone wanted to hang all in the same weekend!? Lol of course with this many people coming and going,you feed them right? And most people are not appreciative of healthy food. So of course it was bacon and eggs for breakfast,chips and snacks for the evening guests. Ordering pizza etc. bah! It was so bad! I have little to no control win it comes to chips,or pizza. I never have chips in my house for that reason. I’m hoping to be down to 221 again by the end of the week,and NOT screw myself over again during the weekend. My weekends have been been killing my progress. I must be diligent this weekend!!!!

 

Oh Easter April 9, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 6:39 am

Ok. So this weekend was a comple write off diet wise. Long weekends always kill me. Not to mention long weekends with family gatherings. I was down to 221 on Saturday. I’m back up to 223. Which is not as bad as I thought it was going to be. I saw family who I havent seen since my wedding (November 26) I have lost an additional thirty pounds since then,making my total almost 60 pounds lost. Well they FREAKED out when they saw me. It honestly embarrasses me. I know it’s a compliment but they went on and on and on about. It makes me feel like I looked like a hideous monster before I lost this weight. Which logically I know is not their intention. And it should be a compliment but these particular family members really went overboard. My mom knows it makes me feel a little awkward so she finally told them that I was concerned everyone would make a big deal of it. Then they simmered down a little. But the topic of conversation for the rest of the afternoon,was talking about weightloss. Bah! I can hardly wait until my weight is normal and it’s the not center of every conversation. I have a lot more weight to lose,so if I continue to lose,I’m sure this will the topic of conversation at every family function for a while!

 

One pound closer April 5, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — unskinnygirl @ 8:45 am

Finally there was positive movement on the scale this morning!!! I’ve been hovering around 224-5 all week last week I saw 223. But this morning I saw 222.4! So that’s awesome! I need to keep it up all through this long weekend. Which will be a challenge! With family gatherings and spending the extra time at home. I’m fairly determined to finally reach the 2-teens next week. I’m so done with the very frustrating 220’s! Of course someone had to bring me a large ice cap at work today. I only drank half. That’s still 4 points I could’ve used for breakfast! So…. Now I’m really hungry,wondering what low point lunch I should have. I eat less during the day on Thursday’s as I always go to my parents house for dinner,and I never know what my mom will make. So I need to be careful durin the day not to use too many points. Heres to hoping I have the will power to eat sensibly this weekend!

 

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