the bad news is that i didnt go to the gym this am, because im under the weather and needed to sleep in and not wake up at 6am.

the good news is i had a bunch of h20 today and was pretty on track food wise:

Breakfast: ½ banana (55), coffee with almond milk (40), egg whites (100), with some sunflower bread (120)- 315

Snack: 1 cup blackberries (70 cal)

Lunch: ½ cup of ww pasta (150), ½ cup of red sauce (60), 2 turkey meatballs (100), 1 cup of spinach (30), parmasean cheese (55), mushrooms 1 cup (15)- 410

Snack: 1 small pear: 80

unplanned snack i wish i could take back: a few pb m&ms and crackers (100)

Dinner: spinach and arugala (40), carrots (35), 1 cup of slices of cucumbers (20), 10 raisins (15), 1 oz feta (35), 3 oz grilled chicken (90, 2 tbsp balsamic vinegar (20), and small splash of olive oil,small sprinkling of candied peacans chopped (60)-total: 330

total for the day: 1305–wish it was 100 calories less. goal for tomorrow is no extra snacking aside from the food i bring!!!

goal tom is gym in the am if i feel well and complete on track during the day with food, and no additional snacking!!

official weigh in friday no matter what and may unofficial weigh in before then!!

i don’t consider something a failure, until you stop trying again.

so, it’s a new year and im back to trying again, even though im at my highest weight ever.

im not going to state all the specific goals again, because words mean nothing without actions.

but they include, gym, water, sleep and food/control.

i have all my food ready and prepped for tomorrow, and im looking forward to a 100% on track week to start 2012 off right. back tomorrow and hoping to be totally on track.

i can do this..i HAVE to do this.

i need to get on track but i dont know how..im so unhappy with my body.

food on track

and no excuses for a few days before the holidays.

then january will be fulltime gym/food/sleep

need to really take control with weigh ins and everything

blah/yay

bfast: eggs with cheese, prosucittto, 1/2 banana, coffee with almond milk

lunch: thai food

dinner: some noodles with cheese and a small cup of soup

water: good

no weigh in

tomorrow will be completely on track including water, sleep, gym, weigh in and food! i can do this! i hope…

breakfast: 1/2 banana, 1/2 ww bagel with light cream cheese and proscuitto, coffee with almond milk

snack: apple

lunch: 1/2 cup of WW pasta (150), 6 vegan meatballs (140), ½ cup of sauce (50), spinach (25), mushrooms (20), 1 tbsp parmesean cheese (20)-355

snack: blackberries and light string cheese (and some popcorn and m&ms–booo snacking).

dinner: tjs microwave indian meal and some chicken shumai..

weigh in-234.8. better than I thought but want that number to come down asap–just glad it wasnt way more which it could have been. weighing in tomorrow, need to keep myself accountable!

water- goal LOTS of h20

workout: 41 min treadmill and 5 min abs.

sleep: not enough and accounts for shorter workout. must get in bed earlier and learn how to leave other things unfinished…

lunch: 1/2 cup of WW pasta (150), 6 vegan meatballs (140), ½ cup of sauce (50), spinach (25), mushrooms (20), 1 tbsp parmesean cheese (20)-355

snack: some caramel popcorn and a pretzel roll. (goal tomorrow is ONLY to eat the snacks I bring, which is fruit and healthy things.)

dinner: some tjs fried rice and chicken dumplings. and 2 oreos–booo!

workout: 45 min easy cardio (need to increase it up tomorrow), and 30 min weights and abs:

water: so far so good

sleep: goodish, but still need to get in bed earlier tonight

no matter what, unofficial weigh in tommorrow am–need to see where im at and where I need to go!!!

im getting up to work out AND weigh in tomorrrow am which WILL be ughly, but its time to face the facts, sadly. maybe this will finally light the fire under my butt to be and stay on track! i hope!!

i have a lot of thinking, reflecting and personal goal making to do this weekend. i think i need to take some time and step away from the computer and tv, and do some good old paper writing and thinking

but back to the gym tomorrow AM and 100% eating on track with lots of water! and officially weighing in on friday–it’s time to face the music!!