They Shoot Fat Women, Don’t They?
March 15th, 2009
That is the title of a Designing Women episode. I just watched the DVD. I love DW. This episode got to me because as you may remember if you watched the show, Suzanne Sugarbaker aka Delta Burke gained weight. And everyone noticed. Suzanne was to go to her high school reunion and overheard people making comments about how fat she was and it hurt her feelings. It reminded me of when I walked into someone’s office and overheard them saying that I used to be so beautiful before I gained so much weight. It stung. But I have relized over the years that life is woven with good days and bad days and fat years and skinny years. I also know what it took to be thin. Delta Burke also talked about in an interview I read what she went through to be thin. I know about the starvation, eating one meal a day, throwing up, and exercising my ass off. I was more unhappy then than I am now. Being thin didn’t make anyone love me more or treat me better.
I am glad Kevin only knows me chubby. When I lose weight, it is not expected. Being healthy is encouraged but fitting into a size 6 is not expected. I know what it takes to be 5′7 and 125 pounds. It means going to bed hungry and waking up hungry. It means 1200 calories a day and worrying about 5 pounds.
It is sad when we have to feel bad or be talked about for gaining weight. Men do it all the time and they lose their damn hair and no one says a word.
I hope they don’t shoot fat women, because if they do, I’m firing back. And it won’t be pretty.
6 Responses to “They Shoot Fat Women, Don’t They?”
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March 16th, 2009 at 2:42 am
Hi Bobbie - I don’t know how I’ve managed to miss your blog all this time, but I guess I’ll just blame being old and bleary-eyed. No, darlin’ - they don’t shoot fat women. I think it’s horses. Or something. And I know what you mean about expectations for women vs expectations for men. Makes no sense. I’ve met a load of old, fat, balding men who swagger around like they think they look like Greek Gods or something. And just let one of us women get a little chubby as we get older, and we’re trying to hide behind purses and big coats all the time. I’m all for getting comfortable at a reasonable weight. I’m not even thinking about getting back to my college weight of 130; I’ll settle for a good, steady 160 and be plenty happy with it.
Take care,
Zoë (Ellabella)
March 16th, 2009 at 7:58 am
Bobbie, this is a very thought provoking post. Especially that you note that no one loves you more or treats you better when you’re thin. I’ve overheard (or just been told directly (my mother!) the same sorts of remarks about myself, and yes, it stung. I’m trying to face my fears, as you have read (and thanks for the encouragement), and with that is a lesson in learning to just be myself, to love myself, to stop fighting with the image!
I think you are a very smart woman.
March 16th, 2009 at 7:58 am
…and ps. no, I’ve never heard a better version than Otis’.
March 16th, 2009 at 9:46 pm
Thanks for making me smile and laugh Bobbie. I think YOU are the little angel
Sounds like your spring cleaning is a fantastic thing. Goodness, I’ve been thinking about it myself. Just thinkin’ though - love when folks move from thinkin’ to ACTiON!
Clutter is just bad for the soul. Now I’ve got a pretty empty lookin’ studio but I’ve mastered the art of hiding everything in those closets!
Take care you rascal!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
March 19th, 2009 at 5:22 am
Thought provoking is true. I wish we could be more like a man is in the fact that they can run around buck n*ked and white fat bellies flopping around and still think they are the studs of the world…
Oops, just got too much of a visual on that and think I may have thrown up in my mouth a little..
March 22nd, 2009 at 5:19 am
You got that right, Bobbie!
Even all those movies about middle aged women finding romance feature fat, wrinkled, balding men and yet the women have to be drop dead gorgeous. No fat or wrinkles allowed. For example:
Jack Nicholson with Diane Keaton and Helen Hunt, even The Sopranos portray Tony as a real stud muffin and he’s pretty gross if you ask me. Have you ever seen a romantic movie where the guy was drop dead gorgeous and the woman was chubby and wrinkled?