Kind of scaring myself

October 27th, 2009

I’ve been MIA from the 3fc blogosphere, and I think that has helped to keep me lethargic about logging my food and getting any exercise. No accountability! End result? Can’t button my fat ass into my jeans. Not exaggerating. So food log here I come (again). I haven’t weighed myself. Too afraid of what I will see. But tomorrow morning, I’ll be hitting the scales.

I’ve still been maintaining my general goofy all about nothing blog at SoNotZen.com and will probably try to keep this one devoted to diet and exercise, because I NEED THE ACCOUNTABILITY. Someone? Anyone? Please HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE. I obviously can’t do it myself.

Today is the first day that I made a conscious effort to EAT NO CRAP.

Breakfast: coffee at home, then DH surprised me by bringing home a latte when he dropped DD10 at school, so two coffees, one full of delicious fatteningness. No food.

Lunch: Lean Cuisine quesadilla, big garden salad, a yogurt, a diet coke.

I put smoked almonds on my salad. And they were so delicious that I proceeded to munch THE ENTIRE DAMNED CAN during the course of the evening. End result? STOMACHACHE.

Dinner: diet coke and a granola bar, six pringles from DD10’s lunch box as I was cleaning it out. The almonds in my stomach were screaming at me to just NOT EAT FOR A MINUTE FOR GOD’S SAKE.

Now I am drinking a big glass of water. To flush out the nuts. Ha, I said nuts.

MINI GOAL: No fast food on days when I am working from home. That should be simple. I’m sure it won’t be. But I’ve got to break the habit and it has to start somewhere.

I haven’t run since the Sausage Fest 5k in early September, but I have been dancing at least twice a week, sometimes three times per week, one hour classes, so that counts, a little bit. But it’s not burning the calories a run does. But I know myself, and I know that the first hint of being overwhelmed will cause me to bail, so exercise is on the back burner for at least another week while I try to get the food shit under CONTROL. Because I? Have been OUT of CONTROL with the food shit. Or the shit food. Either or.

You guys… I don’t want to be fat again. Fatter. I’m surely not thin, but I lost almost 40 pounds and it’s creeping back on. I really really really don’t want to gain that weight back.

Posted by tiny2b Filed in General

5 Responses to “Kind of scaring myself”

  1. Sunny Says:
    October 28th, 2009 at 2:31 pm

    :: smack!!! ::

    There’s your accountability!

    OK, here goes:

    1. tell your hubby next time to get you a skinny latte.

    2. Not smoked almonds! WHOLE almonds un-seasoned. No more than 16 almonds at a setting.

    3. Dancing, and dancing alone, can do it! I am 58 and I have lost 57 pounds in 6.5 months, and the ONLY exercise I do is dancing! I do a half hour at lunch M-Th., and 30-60 min. a night and on weekends. Period! Don’t tell me you can’t lose a lot of weight with dancing as your only exercise!

    This is all about learning self control. About caring about yourself, your future, and your family enough to take care of yourself. Might as well run in front of a speeding car….as continue to overeat. The overall end effect will be the same.

    Now you dust yourself off, stop eating crap you KNOW is counter-productive and unhealthy, put your Big Girl panties on, and step up to the plate and eat and live more responsibly.

    I WILL BE WATCHING.

    (is that good?) :D :: hugs ::

  2. hilarific1283 Says:
    October 29th, 2009 at 11:53 am

    Girl, we need a Slump Buster Challenge! I’m thinking we start slow and try not to push the challenge to the exteme as fast as we did last time. It made us all fall apart. I just need someone watching me like a hawk, while I do the same for them!

    What do ya say!?

    ~ Hilary

    http://www.3fatchicks.com/diet-blogs/thenewme1283

  3. brseay Says:
    October 29th, 2009 at 4:07 pm

    Starting next week my life should be less crazy so you can count on me to hold your toe to the line.

  4. round Says:
    October 30th, 2009 at 9:36 am

    I know what you mean about the accountability here. I too have another blog but if I’m not here things in the weight dept are bad.

    Being here helps keep me focused - reminds me of this committment to myself.

  5. dietbuddydaily Says:
    October 30th, 2009 at 11:06 am

    Welcome back! I’ve been on the LAME list ever since I ate a maple bar with bacon on it from Voodoo donuts in your neck of the woods. October has been a frickin’ disaster! I’m looking forward to reading your posts and checking in on you again!

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