The New Me….

14 Apr, 2010

Struggling :(

Posted by: Hilary In: Weight Loss Goal

Wow.  It has been a while since I’ve been here.  I was going to cancel my account but just couldn’t bring myself to delete everything.  I’ve been blogging on and off about my weight loss since Sept of 2008.  I feel like I have given up.  I used to KNOW it was possible to hit my weight goal but now I feel like it’s lost and will never be found.  I got down to 219 in December and am currently back to 255.  I know that I gain weight fast and yet, I’m doing nothing about it.  I have my first 25k race coming in 1 month.  I am NOT ready.  I was training very hard at first, then I let my eating slip.  Once I stopped eating right, the running started to go from 3 times a week to maybe 1 time.  Then nothing.  I have excuses, of course.  I just started a new job.  I work different hours than I was used to.  We have been working long days and fitting a run in at night isn’t what I want to do.  But I have to start.  It’s starting to get scary.  Am I going to end up 300+ pounds again.  Hating my life.  Where is the determination I had last year?  Where is the person who lost 100 lbs in 11 months?  Where is the person everyone says motivates them to eat right or get exercising?  I feel like a hypocrite.  I talk about my training, I give running advise, I encourage people to go for their goals and yet I sit on my couch at night and eat McDonald’s.    Which person in this picture do I want to be?

 

2 Responses to "Struggling :("

1 | incontrol2day

April 14th, 2010 at 12:52 pm

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we all have those moments when you feel lost. I think it was really brave posting this post about your thoughts. Sometimes I feel defeated too and want to delete my blog but I keep going. I’ve decided to be honest with myself and post both the failures and successes because that’s what life is about!

BEST OF LUCK TO YOU<3 STAY STRONG. I think 100 lbs in 11 months is amazing!

2 | anudderfotografr1

November 6th, 2010 at 12:49 pm

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Deleted old. Started new. Have a new goal in mind this time…

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