Hi everyone!
Georgeous day out today. I’m afraid that these days are going to disappear soon. I hate winter!!! Of course, I worked overnight, so I missed half the day sleeping. And now that I am awake, I have no one to share the day with. I did take a rather boring walk though, just to feel like I wasn’t wasting a nice day.
During my overnight shift last night, I gave in and had a cinnamon raisin Dunkin Donuts bagel. I am past the point of ever ordering one for myself, but when a coworker pulled out a bag of them at 2am, I couldn’t resist. I LOVE bread. Bagels, toast, croissants, etc. I LOVE them! When the same coworked brought bagels last week, I resisted, but last night I was weak. And you know what??? I didn’t even enjoy it that much. It was good, but it felt so wrong. It would be one thing if it was something I was craving and went out to treat myself, but I wasn’t even hungry. They just looked irresistable when she pulled them out. What I am saying, is that I only ate it because I saw it, and that’s not good.
But oh well … one bagel isn’t going to kill me. Just wish I had saved the calories for a special treat today. Not that I’m even craving anything … yet!!!
I’m going to see my boy tonight. He’s been transferred to an alternative center. Not a locked unit, although you can’t leave. You’re not physically locked in, but he had to sign something saying that he wouldn’t leave or he gets in big trouble. And the visits, I assume, are pretty much the same. No touching, one hour long. I can’t believe that this is happening to us. If you have no idea what I am talking about, read back a week or so. My boy got locked up for money (only $2000) he owed from 1999. Couldn’t pay it because he was putting all his money towards child support and bills. Long story. Not a bad boy though … just having his past catch up with him. I wrote the whole story in a recent blog. I miss him more than I can put into words!
OK … gonna do a little cleaning around the apartment before getting ready. This day has really slipped past me quickly!!! Have a great day!
Wow, I just read back about your boyfriend, sounds like you’re going through a tough time. You’re doing extremely well if the only “bad” food you have eaten during this time is a bagel. Even though November is a long way off you will make it through. I’m sorry you’re having to hide it from your family, but I understand. For a while I dated a man who had a difficult past and my family was understandably protective of me and suspicious of him.
I’m glad this blog can be a source of support for you. I also do not share my blog w/family and friends so that I can be completely honest about my feelings. We’re here for you if you need people to lean on.
September 4, 2008 @ 5:58 pm