“Don’t rely on someone else for your happiness and self worth. Only you can be responsible for that. If you can’t love and respect yourself - no one else will be able to make that happen. Accept who you are - completely; the good and the ba…d - and make changes as YOU see fit - not because you think someone else wants you to be different.”
Wow.. just the quote I needed today.
Aside from the fact that I need to lose weight, I’m also combatting Adult Attention Deficit Disorder, which really isn’t helpful in the journey to lose weight. I’m not going to use it as an excuse though, just typing it out so I can see it for myself. I have ADD.
Last night, having a talk with someone whom I love dearly.. I expressed my desire to become a sonographer (ultrasound tech). Suddenly, a knife stabbed me so hard in the chest, I felt it nearly impossible to breathe. I stood up, walked away, trying desperatly to hold back the tears, wanting to go wallow in self pity as the words “With your ADD, you’d never be able to accomplish that” echoing over and over…
To make matters worse, they were said in front of my 8 year old daughter who *does* have ADD as well.
Did you know the CEO of JetBlue has ADD? Albert Einstein has ADD, some of the most successful people in the world have ADD!?
I’m not going to let her bring me down.. I’m going to stand up and prove.. somehow that *YES, I CAN!*
- I can lose weight
- I can become a sonographer
- I can move mountains
- I can be the influence my children need in there life
- I can be positive
That’s all I have..
Posted on October 20th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: Uncategorized | No Comments »
Well, this past few days has been beyond hectic. My 5 year old has been officially diagnosed with Asthma, so we are starting the meds for that. My 8 year old is gearing up for her last soccer game (tomorrow) and preparing to cheer this winter. My husband just started a new job *praise the lord* and the baby is teething! Whoever says being a mother *isn’t* a full time job.. either isn’t a mother or doesn’t live up to their *fullest* potential.. and that’s all I’m going to say about that. So, onto the weight loss. I met with a dietician the other day. She was great, taught me all about what vegetables are *good* for you and what to stay away from.
So far, counting calories, I’ve lost 2.5 lbs in one week! Not bad considering mother nature has hit my womanhood this week!!!! I’m really not excersising much other than cleaning and chasing after the kids. Which i suppose is great excersise, but it’s not physical. If you count harvesting my farms on facebook, well.. my little avatar is getting quite the work out!
My last soccer game is Sunday! Hopefully these extra 2 lbs gone will give me more energy on the field!
That’s all I have for now.
Posted on October 16th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: I want | 1 Comment »
Quick note to my body:
You thought you hit the jackpot this morning when I was preparing eggs and toast for my daughters didn’t you? Well, I won’t lie, it wasn’t easy to resist you, but you’ll thank me for the high fiber oatmeal later! :) We have a lot to do today, so you have to be ready!
Well here it is, the first official day of my journey to a healthier life. I think the biggest struggle for me is going to be resisting the temptation. When something has been a habit of yours for so many years, it’s hard to over come. So, how do I plan on doing this?
Well.. I’ve read Dr. Atkins, made more than enough of the Cabbage Soup Diet, tried the Skinny Pill, Drank my colon away with Herbal Life and Slim Fast and even joined Weight Watchers. None of these worked for me in the long term.. maybe I just wasn’t as dedicated. What did work for me at one point was Counting Calories. I lost 20 lbs and felt AMAZING, but I chose not to stick to it, when I went out of state on a conference and was showered with some of the most amazing Buffets this small town country girl has ever seen.
So, yes, I’m back to counting calories. How am I going to make it work for me? I have several theories.
1. They say (ok the flylady.com says) it takes 27 days to form a habit. So, if I spend the next 27 days creating a healthy habit, maybe it will stick.
2. Resist Temptation - No matter how hard, I will do my best to make healthier decisions.
3. Log into Fitday religiously. Although the website is severely pissing me off… I can’t let that hold me back.
4. EXCERSISE - Whether it’s a cardio DVD or going for a walk, stop making excuses and just do it. Cleaning house is a GREAT start.
5. I hate even numbers so I have to have a number 5. I think i’ll do the old fashion.. looking at myself in the mirror everyday and saying something positive. My daughters preschool class does this, maybe I should too!
I’m also going to create small daily goals.
Today my goal is to do 30 minutes of Cardio.
Oh yes, and I weighed myself, I weigh 191.7 yesterday it was 192.4
Posted on October 9th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: I want | No Comments »
Dear Body Fat,
Due to the recent recession, I am forced to cut back on any unecessary, excess baggage that I can’t afford. Although you’ve been very persistant and haven’t left my side (or butt, or stomach or arms for that matter), it is time that we part ways.
This will be a slow process, I realize. I fully understand that you didn’t join me over night and you won’t be gone over night, but it will be beneficial to the both of us if you begin packing up your things and heading out. I will buy you a plane, train or bus ticket, whichever you prefer.
Today I’m going to begin tracking what I eat, and doing some cardio.. this should speed up your departure process. Will I miss you? Sure! I will miss having something cushiony to land on when I trip and fall. But I will enjoy not having to squeeze on my clothes, being afraid to stand on the scale, and feeling like i’m being weighed down *literally*. See, believe it or not, underneath it all, I am a very strong and determined person and I’m not going to let you control me anymore.
Please don’t make this any harder than it already is. I can’t keep you here. Your being here is costing me important things, such as my health, my self esteem, my time with my family.
You must be completely gone by March of next year, but if you go before that, I will be just thrilled. Don’t try to entice me during the holidays, this will just make me work harder.
I have nothing more to say… other than, please keep this letter as a reminder that I don’t want you here.
Amy
Posted on October 8th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: Letter to my fat | 3 Comments »
29 things I want..
Why 29 things? Because even numbers scare me.. they are too structured. LOL I know.. wierd.. anyway here we go.
1. I want Peace in my life
2. I want to look tiny in my husbands clothes
3. I want to wear a bathing suit next summer
4. I want to be healthy
5. I want to look good in a dress
6. I want to stop feeling insecure
7. I want to say I did it and know that it’s true.
8. I want to make heads turn.
9. I want to cross my legs without having lower belly fat try to stop me.
10. I want to look good in lingerie
11. I want to see old classmates and have them say “You haven’t changed!”
12. I want to be a good role model for my children.
13. I want to feel good when I wake up.
14. I want to run a marathon one day
15. I want to be rich
16. I want to help others
17. I want to gain control
18. I want to be proud of myself
19. I want others to be proud of me.
20. I want to leave a legacy.
21. I want to be a Crime Scene Investigator.
22. I want to write a novel.
23. I want to beat all of my facebook friends on bejeweled blitz.
24. I want to get organized.
25. I want to be a better mom.
26. I want to be a stronger wife.
27. I want a yorkie.
28. I want to go to DisneyLand.
29. I want a Wii Fit
Posted on October 7th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: I want | 3 Comments »
Dear Amy,
Karma.. it has a way of getting you back doesn’t it? I remember when you were, ohhh 12 years old and an overweight girl was running down the street in front of your house. Your *best friend*, because we all have those when we are 12, began singing the classic Carole King tune “I feel the earth, move under my feet..” you know the rest, and laughing at this poor girl. Did you laugh with her? Sure! You were young, dumb and NEVER going to be a big girl, so why not? Right? Damnit Amy, you were raised better than that.. and now.. look at you.. 192.4 lbs, 3 kids and lots of take out food later… UGH! To say I’m disappointed with you is an understatement.
You are a very beautiful, intelligent, caring and AMAZING woman.. how could you let yourself get to this point? What happened? Are you going to blame it on stress, birth control pills, having babies, money.. what? Who’s fault is it this time?
The truth is, it’s no one but yourself. You have wallowed in self pity for so long, it’s time to take a stand and break through the brick walls of guilt and shame that have been holding you back. You are the only person in control of your future and if you don’t change something now, it may get to a point where it’s too late, and then what will you tell your children, that it’s THEIR FAULT? Pfft. Please, get a grip on yourself and your life.
1st. assignment… write down a list of what YOU WANT.. 29 things, anything.. don’t question me just do it. 2nd. turn off your computer and get moving.. whether it’s housework, playing with the kids, going for a walk, or putting in an excersise dvd. Do those two things and let’s see how you feel, then we’ll talk about how to achieve your goals.
Good Luck! I’ll support you 100% of the way, and I will not let you down again.
Love,
Yourself.
Posted on October 7th, 2009 by supermom78
Filed under: Letter to myself | 1 Comment »