Digging In My Heels

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I sit here tonight a little apprehensive yet anxious about the upcoming year and what it will bring with it. I wonder how the daughter will do in her winter term at university and if my son and I will get the full-time jobs we’re hoping for near the beginning of January. I contemplate how much 2013 will continue to shape and mould my life. Both good and bad. I think the biggest thing taking up a lot of my thoughts these days involve the weight and if I will manage to lose the rest before summer comes. It is so important to me to lose another 50lbs so I am able to feel healthy again. And with the weightloss, I pray the fibromyalgia leaves as the pounds do. This is at the forefront of the motivation for my 2013 weightloss plans. The person who coined the phrase, “no pain, no gain” never had fibromyalgia! LOL  I’m hoping it will be the other way around! No gaining and no pain!

Today, I am 218.4lbs! I just had to write it down because I know tomorrow morning, that scale will once again, give me something else to work on. :-)

Putting Christ BACK into Christ-mas

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I’ve had a hectic week with things going on around the house. The son has been sick for a couple of weeks with a chest cold / bronchitis and wasn’t doing too well for a few days recently that prevented me from going to work just to take care of him. (my son is disabled) Thank goodness he’s doing much better now.

The daughter is writing her final exam on Friday, December 14 then will have about a month off before starting her winter term. It’s hard to believe she’s right in the middle of her 5th year of university and will eventually graduate then go on to Teachers College and then an ESL course (English as a Second Language) so she can teach globally. She’s already quite fluent in Spanish (she’s doing a double major! One in English Literature and the other in Language) and I hope she decides to teach abroad and not settle down too quickly after she graduates. Don’t get me wrong, I want a good, Christian son-in-law & grand-babies, just not too soon! :-)

I’ve been a little discouraged and down-hearted the past week or so mostly because of the weather I think. It’s been overcast and gloomy out for weeks now and missing the sunshine. We all started our Vitamin D regime for the winter months to help get ourselves in better spirits. I’ve gained about 4lbs this past week as well. Not happy about this. Yes, I’ve been indulging and allowing the kids to “treat” me to nights out at the local restaraunts and I have no excuse for this. Just that I’ve been feeling really down and then eating out made me feel even worse about things. Ugh, it’s a vicious cycle isn’t it?!  Since I’ve been “moody” as of late, I’ve had a lot of time to think about the season and despite how I’m feeling “right now”, I’m still very blessed and content with my life.

As the Christmas season approaches, I find myself more and more thoughtful on the immeasurable awesome-ness of God and what He did for us (humanity) in the birth of His Son, Jesus Christ on what we call “Christmas” day. I am so grateful that He loves us so much - that knowing His Son would one day have to die a horrible death, He still gave us the greatest gift possible - His ONLY Son. For this I am truly humbled.

Currently weighing in at 222.6lbs - So NOT happy with this number!

Day 285 - And Counting…

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It’s been almost a year since I started this journal and have managed to lose 43.8lbs to date. I am currently weighing in at 219.0 on a regular basis and have been keeping the weight off.

I’ve had a very eventful and industrious year thus far and imagine the Christmas season will bring even more surprises before 2012 ends with a flurry.

When I first started this journal I had no idea if I would succeed or even be able to continue to write as life has a tendancy to interfere with even the best of intentions. However, much to my surprise, I’m still journaling and still losing weight! I think that being able to write down how I have felt and documenting the influences in my life has helped me to stay on track. Reflecting on what triggers my eating binges and then changing what causes me to stumble has had a very large impact on my weightloss success this year.

As 2013 approaches, another birthday comes with it. (January 3rd - I will be 45yrs old) I anticipate a productive and another successful year in weightloss and more self-discovery.

My goal for 2013 is to lose the rest of the weight to reach my goal of 160lbs for the summer. If I don’t manage to obtain this goal in the expected time frame, I won’t fret, but know I will continue to work hard to lose the desired weight until I achieve goal weight hopefully before 2014 rolls around.