Shall We Shrink??

I was going to try to sleep in today, just to make sure I made it to midnight, but that was a no go. You know, when I went out for New Year’s I never had a problem with that… ha!

Runeway18, thanks for the comment. How sweet you are! So you have actually passed part of that dreaded exam?! Kudos to you! I should have taken it when I graduated 4 years ago. Ugh. Oh well, it will definitely be an experience. Plus there is no going back for me… it’s paid for and that could have bought me a LOT of shoes, so there is no wasting it!

I keep reading about all these resolutions… I was trying to think about what I could make mine. For so many years it was to stop smoking, but I never could smoke long because it seems I was always getting pregnant and then breastfeeding. So really it was- smoke for a year, stop for two- for the last decade. But, I finally stopped no matter what for good last April (and I think that has contributed to the widening of my booty… I weigh 16 pounds more now than I did then). So that leaves that one out. And a couple of years ago I resolved to let the people in my life know that I love them all the time, not just when something happened or I needed something. It’s so hard to stay connected. And I think I did that one pretty well, too, so that leaves that out. Hmmmmm… Maybe instead of a resolution, I will make a list of goals.

-Take and pass all parts of the CPA. There is nothing hotter than a nerdy accountant.

-Run in a 5K and a 10K. Oh, and the World Famous Mud Run, cause the only thing hotter than a nerdy accountant is a muddy, nerdy accountant with a hot bod!

-Have a baby and shut down the baby maker for GOOD! Including getting all of the dysfunctional parts of me removed. Preferrably a girl, please. Thanks.

-Stay fit if I do get pregnant. I don’t know if I have ever told anyone this before, but when I stopped looking at the scale (which was a good 2 weeks BEFORE I delivered my first son) I weighed in at 267. I know, crazy. I gained 67 with the 2nd, and 37 with the 3rd (although I
weighed 20 pounds more than normal when I got pregnant with the 3rd, so it evens out). I hope I can continue the downward pattern and NOT gain 5 bazillion pounds this time…

-Reteach my children acceptable food behavior. They are healthy eaters for the most part, but I have them thinking there are “bad” foods and “good” foods, and they talk about going on diets. Seriously, they are tiny lil beanpoles! I have called myself fat one too many times, and I am going to stop that. In all actuality, I make chubby look damn good. No more bad self talk, especially not in front of the boys. Everything is going to be healthy or not as healthy or unhealthy.

Hmmmm… that is it for now, I suppose. Oh, and I resolve to quit my job. Which I still haven’t done. But technically I still don’t feel well! Okay, I am just a chicken and I don’t want to ruin anyone’s holiday. I am doing it though. Promise.

Have a great day, chickies! And a Happy New Year!!!

Confession: no run or weights as of yet, but there was a peach cobbler. AGHHHHHHHHHHHH

************************************************************************

Well, thanks to you fitness freaks (Healthy4aChange and getupnow and inkheartmeg to name a few) that I heart so much, I have been insired to get off my lazy arse. I ran 3 miles, yes 3, in the foggy, nasty, rainy mess that is So Cal. I was so mojoed up that I didn’t even stop when rain was in my eyes. I did, however, try to wipe them at one point and poked myself right in the eyeball! It is still watering. But, I still did not stop! And then, I came home and did my shoulders/traps and back/bicep weight training. I am now a limp noodle. But, on the bright side, I am a limp noodle with a net calorie intake that is MUCH more managable!

Thanks for all you chickies do for me, especially the stuff you don’t even know you are doing!!!

Um, no! I tossed and turned ALL night, so nervous and feeling so badly about quitting my job. They are all so good to me there. I just don’t have the heart to leave them. BOO!

In other news, inkheartmeg, funny you should say that! We have been tossing the idea of another one around for a long while but kept wanting to wait until the “time was right.” Well, I have decided there is never going to be a perfect time, so we are just going to do it! I’m making my appointment with the doc today to have my IUD removed. I really, really wanted to lose at least 15 pounds before we tried, but I pretty much can deal with not. I haven’t looked into losing weight while pregnant, but I know you can work out if you have an established pattern and so I know I’ll be able to at least stay fit. I told the hubbs last night I want to run a 5k pregnant! How cute would I be?! I hope, hope, HOPE we can get pregnant without that surgery, and that if we can, we have a GIRL! I want one!!!

Alright, that is all for now. I have a busy day of gift card shopping to take the boys on and I need to plan our night of treats for our family game night new years rockin eve extravaganza

Have a happy day, chickies!!!

to give staying at home another go. I mean really, if I structure my day right, I can stay more than busy. I can finally study and take that damn CPA. I can make healthy foods for us every night (assuming I feel like cooking! ha!). So, any ideas on how to make a schedule? Oh my gracious, I am so anal.

Oh, and how do I quit my job?!? I can’t give 2 weeks notice because I have no childcare, which is the reason I am quitting in the first place. I checked into it, and to get childcare on such short notice was basically going to double the cost we paid before. I would have to pay full time rates. For 20 hours a week? For ONE kid (and a 6year old 2 hours on Wednesday)?? Nah, I’m good. Almost 1000 bucks a month, and I only bring home about $2000. Add in all the other stuff (like extra daycare when they are out of school, lunches out, extra gas, etc) and I am working for practically nothing! What is the point of that?! Which brings me back to my original question… how do I quit?!

**************************************************************************
getupnow, I am totally a Martha Stewart and LOVE to cook, so I’m gonna start stealing some of your recipes

I ran a little over 2 miles tonight and then did my chest/triceps (ouch!) and leg days. I am sore already. I suppose that is what I get for being so lazy. I’m just glad I felt well enough to run at all. Speaking of running, I need to map out some more 3 and 4 mile runs. I want to make 3 the new 2 and 4 the new 3

Night chickies!

I. May. Die. Soon. I am so freaking SICK! AGHHHHH. The hubbs is at work. I, of course, called in. So, I am stuck at home, dying, with all the boys, and I have been listening to lego star wars on the wii and wonder pets on the tv. SHOOT ME, PLEASE.

Hope your day is better than mine.

Oh, and I flaked on the working out yesterday. I laid on the couch instead. Meh.

So although I felt like butt last night, I made myself go for another run. I didn’t do another 3 miles, but I did do al little over 2. Yay! I stayed up too late last night talking with the hubby. I am so torn as to what to do about the job/childcare/have another baby thing. Seriously. I can’t sleep. I am consumed with guilt over every decision. I am meant to be a career woman… business suits and heels mixed with power? Count me IN! But, I love being a Mama, and the hours I work are sometimes not conducive to being part of a family. AGHHHHH Is there a right answer? I am beginning to think I will never be happy, that each choice holds a part of me that will leave me guilt ridden. So, since I stayed up so late, the hubby let me sleep in. Yeah, I slept til almost NOON! I can’t remember the last time I did that. So, I have yet to run this morning. I am committing to at least 3 miles today, as well as 2 more strength traing sessions. I have got to get this routine in check!! Weigh in this morning was back to my low normal, just like I like it. Now to make it a little lower…

Hope all you chickies are having a swell day!

I am officially sick. It just hit me. I have been fighting this cold that the boys have had for almost a week now. At least I got my workout in before… Today I did double duty. I ran 3 miles and then did 2 weight days. I know, I should have just done one per day lke I was supposed to, but I got L-A-Z-Y over the last week. I dunno if it’s just hormones or what, but I am in a funk. I have been worried sick about putting my lil man into yet another in home daycare. We are 2 for 2 in the psycho department. But, the only way to get him into the development center is to work full time. I looked around, and there are several openings I’m sure I could get. The thing is, I would LOVE to work full time. I miss being busy, busy and being the boss. I also miss the money. But, I do like my time with the boys, and I would miss out on sports, etc., should I work full time (practice is like at 4… who can do that?! and the games start at 5!). I just really would feel more secure if he were in the development center. This is such a tough choice. I have always worked full time, and felt so blessed to get a really great paying part time job. I just don’t know what to do… Sometimes I absolutely hate being here all alone. I wish I had someone to HELP. Maybe just one sister? My mom? Come on… anybody! I miss date night with my hubby and going anywhere alone without feeling massive amounts of guilt.

Christmas was awesome! We baked for hours and took our goodies to all the fire stations on base. They were all so appreciative, and they were so nice to the boys! They gave them rides in the trucks, let them wear their gear, showed them the axes and other tools… they LOVED it!! After we came home and made a mini Christmas dinner to take to the hubbs as a surprise. All in all, GREAT day even without the hubby.

I hope you all had a fab Christmas, too!

Now for New Years… eek! I should make a resolution or something. Or not. I never keep those anyway.

Well, the scale was kind to me this morning! Thanks, Santa! I ate a crap ton of candy yesterday, but tried to make up for it by having soup for dinner. SO SO SO hard when the dinner I made for the men looked so delicious, but I pulled through. We went to see Madagascar II last night, and thank GOD for small favors… the snack bar was under renovation! They had bottled water and no candy left that the boys liked (I have the willpower to not get any, just not to stay away from theirs apparently!!) so we had safe water. The movie was HILARIOUS!

This morning we had a yummy breakfast… pumpkin wheat pancakes, turkey sausage, and scrambled eggs. YUM! The hubby has left for work, and we won’t see him until tomorrow. I am a little sad knowing my family at home is all together doing all of the things I’d like to be doing too, but I’m okay so far. The men are keeping me busy with assembling all these damn toys!! The 3 year old is uber into legos and k’nex, so I am being a super big helper.

I hope you all have a safe and MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Yesterday was not a good day. I ended up having to take my 6 year old with me to work because of daycare issues (my lady has been weird lately). So, needless to say, yesterday was a crazy morning. I hadn’t been at work for two hours when I received a text message… from my sitter… freaking out because my 3 year old was calling her daughter a fucking monkey and this HAD TO STOP. I was so, so, SO blown away. I replied that he was saying funky monkey, like he always says… it’s from a cartoon… and has no racial implications. And she says that he told her that his Mommy and Daddy say it, too. Well no SHIT! He says you’re a funky monkey, and we say NO you’re a funky monkey! Anyway, we got it straightened out eventually, but I was so MAD that I sent my husband (I had stuff I had to get done at work and there was no way I could leave) to go get him. So, now we have no daycare, no money to pay for a new daycare (since we paid 2 weeks in advance and she’s obviously not going to refund our money, and I am using my last two vacation days today and tomorrow to try to find a daycare that we can’t afford. AGHHHHHH What makes me so mad is that she would even think that a 3 year old would even be capable of that kind of hate… she knows him, and she knows us. She’s been our lady for over 5 months. Obviously we are not racist or we would not have our son at a daycare where he is the only white person. And do you know the craziest part? Lil man hurt himself last night and came to lay with me on the couch (while I was watching Mamma Mia… FABULOUS!!) and hubbs said he was so cute or something. I said yes, for a horrible racist, he is pretty cute, making light of the horrible day we had. My husband had NO idea what I was talking about!! He thought the whole reason she was mad was because lil man had dropped the F Bomb!! He didn’t know she took it as a racial slur!!! My husband is so naive! Oh, and like my BFF pointed out… he is 3 and talks like a 3 year old. When he says shirt it sounds like shit. Everytime. Funky Monkey sounds like Fun-T Mun-T. Does that sound hateful??? And worst of all, he won’t even say it now, so I have no idea what she said to him. I feel like she is stealing his innocense.

So, I never worked out yesterday. I felt sorry for myself and we had a family movie night. I’m off today, so I am going to take the boys to the track and do both my weights from today and yesterday. For some reason my hamstrings are still sore! I think the 15 pound weights were too much to start with… everything else is ache free.

And lastly, and most sadly, my weight is up about 3 pounds. I am thinking Aunt Flo could be to blame, but I don’t want to go easy on myself just in case she isn’t. I really need to track my calories better. I will track ALL day today.

For all of you leaving for your family’s house soon… MERRY CHRISTMAS! I’ll be here… hoping I can stay awake long enough to wrap all the presents I bought tonight!!! At least I have already got my Christmas Breakfast shopping done!!

My weight this morning is SCARY bad. Warning call headed. So, I shall be running 2 times per day til Christmas Eve and also weights every day. I am making my official schedule as we speak. I ate for crap last night. And for NO reason! AGHHH I haven’t done that in so long. And to top it off, I didn’t drink water ONCE yesterday! Isn’t that sick???

*************************************************************************

Okay, I have now run 3 miles and done day 1 of my weight training. Life is much better and I feel in control again. So, just in case anyone is wondering, I used to be into weight lifting… like LOVED it!… and there was a sight my father in law (who is 6′7″, 250, and like 6% bodyfat!) turned me onto called bodybuilding.com that was so helpful. When I first started, I bought some 5 and 8 pound dumbells and went through their HUGE list of exercises, narrowing the list to dumbell exercises only so I could work out at home. So, now I am basically starting over again. I just went through my workout journal from last time and took the workouts from that. The deal this time is I broke it down into 4 days: chest/triceps, back/biceps, legs, and shoulders/traps. I am going to do one per day, take a day of rest, and start over. Today was legs and this is what I did:

db lunges 8×10x3
ss db squats 8×10x3

standing calf raise 8×10x3
ss seated calf press 8×10x3

stiff legged dead lifts 8×10x3

bench hamstring curl 8×10x3

I went super easy on the weight and the reps because I don’t want to get too sore too fast. I am definitely not as strong as I was before… Also, the ss means super set, which is where instead of taking a break after the first one, you go directly into the second one. So I did 10 lunges, then 10 squats, then break for 30 seconds and then repeat for a total of 3 times.

The reason I am telling you all this is because when I first started, weightlifting was SO intimidating to me. I was afraid of doing it wrong and killing myself, or looking stupid, or getting all big and bulky. But you know what? NONE of those things happened. Also, weight bearing exercise is PROVEN to increase bone density (check out this article! ). And we all want to have nice posture, right? No osteoporosis here! Also, the sight has these amazing, motivational transformation stories. Check em out!

Alright, I’m done here. I’m off to shower and get ready for this day. The boys got some early Christmas money from both my Dad and Grandma, so they are taking us to the movies and then going to get some gifts

Happy Saturday!!