Round

I have been pretty stressed and busy with work these past few months.  It was helpful to pull me out of the ectopic-induced depression, but has kept me on the road and on the run with very little time for myself and frankly little motivation to take care of myself.

I will be starting a new chapter at work soon and at least for the next few weeks should have little travel and committments in the evenings, and therefore few excuses to not cook and exercise.  I feel like the fact that my busy period ending this past Thursday was a clear signal from the universe to get back home and focus on myself for a few days, as my DH is traveling until Tuesday so I have a free weekend.  I had no food in the house due to our travels and work the past few weeks, so yesterday I stocked up on veggies and am considering the weekend a time to get some good habits back in place.

Yesterday I cooked a fabulous white chili with cauliflower (vegetarian and very low cal) and ate very lightly all day.  My plan is to eat in a similar way until Tuesday and start to get some exercise, and be somewhat back in the swing of things by the time hubby gets home.

I was able to get some shopping done in London during my trip and so have enough Fat clothes to make it for a few months without the horror of shopping here in Paris.  Jeans that fit, comfy black pants and a few work items, in all, enough to tide me over.

Thanks for the comments - all help nudge me back on track!

Well, SCARY NUMBER is back again, and I’m not surprised.

I’ve been eating poorly in general, although not catastrophic.  More like ‘maintain heavy weight’ eating vs ‘gain even more’ eating. Still, it’s the wrong direction.  We ate way too much takeout over the weekend - from Friday lunch to Sunday dinner it was all takeout.  Indian, Lebanese, Thai. Oy.

I did have a few good steps.

• We went to the gym once this weekend, which was only our second time since joining (blush).
• I did a small amount of cooking and went to the market to buy fruit and veggies.
• I pulled the scale out of it’s hiding place and put it in plain view in the bathroom and have been getting on it every day.  Turning a blind eye was NOT working.

I really hate being at my current weight.  My rings are so tight I couldn’t get them on again if I ever managed to get them off - very ugly bulging fat on my fingers just after the rings.  Yucky.

My face is round and blah-looking.  Double chin (at least double) visible from every angle.

My arms are heavy and fill up certain of my jackets to ’sausage’ stage.

My belly is huge and blubbery and just gross.

My legs are heavy and jiggly too.

My bras are too small, there is bulge everywhere.

My clothes continue to be a problem, I have just barely enough to dress myself for a week, not even taking into consideration fashion, just pure function.  I am down to about 3 jackets and 3 pair of pants.

It’s a sad state of affairs…

On Friday we picked up takeout Lebanese food (from Noura, in the pic).
It’s been really good but overabundant (my husband is known for his over-the-top spending and ordering…).  We had it lunch, dinner and lunch again and there is still some leftover.  And then last night we had Indian takeout.

I really need to go shopping and get back to cooking.

Lebanese isn’t the worst food you can imagine from a health standpoint, but too much of anything is bad, and it is often full of olive oil and therefore calories galore.  The Indian food? Don’t even ask…

So I’m heading out to the market this morning to hit the organic stand (despite the cost).  The recent news stories on Chinese chemical contamination scared me.  I’m sure I’ll buy other stuff too, but this week I’m starting there instead of passing other places first and then having sticker shock… When I just go to the organic stand I can kind of fool myself that I don’t know it’s 3x as expensive.

That said, we won’t be  home much this week. I have meetings galore (the types of meetings I usually travel for, only this week they are here in Paris). No lunches at home all week, dinner only twice I think.  And Saturday we’re leaving for a 3 day weekend in London (and then I stay the rest of the week for work).  So I can buy organic to get me through tonight and the few meals during the week.