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Has it been a week really!?!?!?!?!?! August 10, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — reborn2shine @ 10:49 am

I can’t believe that it has already been a week since I lasted posted.  And this is going to be a very short post as well.  I have a lot going on in life right now and I am not ready to discuss it yet.  I am going to try and do a few more posts this week though to at least keep a running total of what is going on with the food aspect of my transformation.  I haven’t been super stringent with my diet, but I have definitley gotten into a rhythm with my food choices and seem to be getting more relaxed with it. I weighed in this morning and I am down another 3.1 lbs from last week ….WOOHOO!!!

 

:)

 

SW:330.2

CW:327.1

 

Very close to my first goal of 325.  I am hoping to hit that before a trip that I have to make next Thursday. (I will give you the inside scoop on that once I get back)

 

Toodles :)

 

Exercised for the first time yesterday….. August 3, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — reborn2shine @ 9:37 am

So….I finally felt as though I could get out and do a little cardio.  I leashed up the dogs and set out to do a double loop around the block.  Walked a mile total and was sweating like a beast when I got back.  But miraculously I did not have any pain in my leg or ankle the this morning.  That is very unusual since it is the one I shattered 10 years ago that has been repaired using screws in multiple surgeries.  I felt really good after too and talked myself into situps and pushups to boot!! 

 

I am excited that the weekend is finally here and I am looking forward to cleaning my house and getting to the park with the dogs.  I would really like to buck up the courage and go see “Mr. Grey”, but I just don’t think I can yet. We haven’t spoken since yesterday and I am feeling a little out of sorts about it still.  I had a great response on my previous entry and I am going to try and work through this, but my mind is going in all different directions.

 

Speaking of messed up minds….As of two weeks ago I have cut off all contact with my mother.  No more money to her, no more phone calls, no texts.  I just can’t do it anymore.  I feel like I have spent half my life trying to pay her back for adopting me and getting me out of a crap situation, but I am coming to realize that shouldn’t be something I have to do….and even if it were….I HAVE DONE ENOUGH!!!

 

My eating has been totally off for the last few days as I have not had time to go to the grocery store, but I am going to get over there today or first thing in the morning and make sure I have a fully stocked fridge going into this coming week.  I am almost out of cereal too, but I noticed that it is on sale at Kroger this week….woohoo!!!  I am going to sit down and make a list in a minute so that I am sure I don’t forget anything and so I don’t buy anything that I don’t need.  Can’t forget garbage bags again!!

 

 

Toodles :)

 

Freaking Irritating!!! August 1, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — reborn2shine @ 1:24 pm

Today has not been the greatest of days.  I woke up feeling like crap and I am sure it’s because my eating was off all weekend and my body didn’t want what I put in it on Monday.  Then I go get a grilled chicken sandwich with no mayo from McDonald’s which is approx. 250 calories and on my way back in the person I work with yells out, in front of a client, “ANDREA!!!  Don’t think I don’t see that.  Your not supposed to be eating that!!”  You know…..my business is my business and it is embarassing to be called out by a co-worker in front of a client just because she knows I am dieting and thinks she can.  She didn’t even know what I had in the bag, but felt it neccessary to degrade me in front of a person we do business with.

 

Then to make matters worse I was feeling really alone and sent a text message to my “Christian Grey”.  I man that at one point told me how much he loved me and even said he wanted to marry me, but now seems hell bent on making me miserable.  We met when I was in college and had a amazing physical relationship.  The kind that makes you see stars and fireworks. We would talk for hours on end about our lives and all the things we had in common. I haven’t seen him in person in 15 years. I have moved all over the country and we have always kept in touch, but now that I work half a mile from his house he seems to have forgotten that I even exist. I never hear from him and I am too disgusted with my appearance to go knock on his door.  I can’t get it out of my head that he has probably seen me around town and is grossed out. My feelings of rejection have hit an all time high and I am struggling to make it through the day. I should have known he wouldn’t text me back.  Why is it that I am attracted to the men that I know are going to detroy me and bring me down?  Why am I still in love with him?

 

 

-Girl With The Broken Heart ;’(

 

 

8/2/2012……Update:   Heard from my Mr. Grey just now.  He had to have a pace maker installed…I knew he was having some problems, but i didn’t know the extent of them. :(

This is a man that runs marathons and was always in perfect health….I just can’t believe it.