Yup, you heard it right…I didn’t go to my beloved yoga class this morning!  Eep!  No, it was not due to lack of motivation…I have been having disturbed sleep the last couple of nights and I woke up very sort of funky feeling…  I say funky as in…kinda fuzzy headed and dizzy and just kinda grumpy I guess…  I felt a little better when I got my whole grain toast and peanut butter into me…and then a little better still with my milk and protein powder.  But, I was listening to my body and it said no class today…  I was sitting down trying to write a letter and DH calls, we had an errand that couldn’t be put off and he offered to take me to lunch!  :)  Can’t turn that down now can we??? lol  So, off I toddled to meet up with him.  We ended up going to one of our favorite haunts…don’t laugh…it is Ruby Tuesday!  I love their hamburger minis!  So sue me….  Anyway, it was getting close to my lunch time and I knew it would probably be a little after 12 before I could get some food in me so I took some almonds and wheat crackers with me in my bag to munch a few before the food arrived so I wouldn’t inhale it.  Also, I wanted the wheat crackers as my “brown” because I knew I wouldn’t get it in my meal.  I think I did extraordinarily well…I ate two complete minis…then I just ate the meat off the other two…only a handful of the extremely luscious french fries and an unsweetened ice tea!  Yay me!  What was even weirder about it was it wasn’t hard…I mean the french fries were amazing and normally I would have sucked them up and went scrounging off DHs plate as well (been there done that lots of times!!)  I don’t know what is different now…  Maybe it is because when I am reading this book…(Potatoes Not Prozac in case you didn’t catch it…hehehe) I feel like she is inside my head and understands what I think because she has been there…and more importantly knows how to fix it!  I have already noticed a big difference in how I feel.  I have been studying food, diets, fitness, weight loss & everything else for years now…I started in 2001 and lost a total of 43.5 pds…then gained a few back recently after my past bout with some stuff and ensuing medication…but I seemed to have been losing more and more of my control…the control that allowed me to lose the weight in the first place…and that scared me…a lot…  As you probably all know, it is a slippery slope to be on…and I was sliding…until I found this book…it is acting as my anchor right now and I feel more hopeful…not just about losing the rest of the weight that I want to lose (though I do believe that will happen now!!!) but about healing how I feel which is even more important to me right now…the mood swings…the crashing fatigue…it is all just too horrible to do anymore.  If eating a few things differently in a certain way can give me relief…that is the most important thing to me!!  If my emotions and compulsions can be controlled simply by avoiding certain foods and ways of eating, I feel you would have to be crazy not to do that!  I have been this way as long as I can remember…it is finally starting to make some sense…it makes me feel….FREE!!!!