I have to admit that I’m totally exhausted. I didn’t realize how tired I was until this morning when I finally got a chance to think about myself for a change. And it doesn’t look so good.
I’m fat. I’ve had a rash for six weeks. (My usual reaction to stress.) I itch like crazy. Yesterday evening, I took a bite of watermelon and my taste buds reacted to it like I’d taken in a mouthful of lemon juice. The reaction was so intense it was almost painful. I reached up and touched my jaw and realized it was swollen. I looked in the mirror and the right side of my face looks like a chipmunk with a walnut stuffed in its cheek. It’s still swollen and sore from my ear down to my neck this morning and I don’t know what that’s about.
I’m totally out of touch with my body. My friends. My family. My home. Not to mention my Chickie Friends.
On a good note: Andrew’s graduation went off without a hitch. I was so proud of him. We had a graduation party for him here at the house. My house is a disaster but I didn’t care. Everyone in attendance was either a friend or family member and I figured they know me well enough to forgive the mess and disorder. Anyone in the group who was offended by it can just bite me. Here’s a picture of Andrew, my mom and I when we got to the house.
First generation, second generation and fourth generation. Andrew won’t smile because he still has braces but they’re supposed to come off next week. Come to think of it…my jaw already looks swollen but I hadn’t noticed it yet.
Graduation went off okay but we were very disappointed in our parents and guests. In all my years of teaching, it was the most disrespectful crowd I’ve ever seen. Even though they were asked repeatedly to please hold all applause until the end of each row of graduates had been called, they refused to do so. As each graduate’s name was called, guests hooted and whistled and yelled like it was a pep rally or something. After the principal stopped the proceedings and asked, again, that everyone please honor the traditions and decorum of the ceremony, a group of guests took it as a challenge and made it a point to be even more noisy and disruptive. They were eventually escorted from the proceedings but the crowd never did really calm down and get serious. Next year, our principal has decided, we’ll have to do something to address the problem. What a shame…that we have to plan, in advance, to address rudeness and disrespect from a group of adults. What’s graduation like at your schools, Chicklets? Are your guests recognizing the decorum of the proceedings or are they getting as bad as ours? I’ve seen it happening and getting worse year after year. Plans are made, the kids rehearse and everyone works like a dog to provide a beautiful and momentus graduation and parents act like they’re at a football game, cheering on the team.
I’m thinking about the last four months. I’ve been in a pivotal role with:
the selection and induction ceremony for the Junior National Honor Society
the Winter Award Ceremony for ROTC
the selection and induction ceremony for the National Honor Society
the ROTC annual parent dinner and award ceremony
the Junior Ring Ceremony
the Senior Award Ceremony and dinner for 500
Senior Graduation and a Graduation Pary for Andrew
No wonder I’m exhausted. I finished my last day of work yesterday and it’s the first day in ages that I haven’t had a heavy burden on my shoulders.
So I slept for nine hours, got up this morning, and had my coffee. Then I had more coffee. Then I decided to take my shower but I thought, “Hey…I don’t have to go anywhere. I can just sit here for a while.” So I played Bejeweled Blitz for a while. Then I played Mah Jong. Then I put on a bathing suit and took my coffee out to the spa. I haven’t been in it for almost a month because my skin has been so irritated. I decided to relax in the spa and then come in and take a shower to make sure I don’t have any chlorine on me to aggravate the itching. When I get stressed, I tend to break out all over my torso. No one can see it but it drives me crazy and I’m lathering on cortisone by the spoonful.
And now I’m sitting here. I haven’t done my hair because I don’t have to. I haven’t put on my makeup because I don’t have to. I haven’t gotten dressed because I don’t have to. I’m thinking about making the bed and cleaning the house but I don’t have to. Maybe I will and maybe I won’t.
Tomorrow starts DH’s weekend and Sunday is our 42nd anniversary. He called me an hour or so ago and said to make some hotel reservations or plan an RV getaway or something. Maybe I will. Right now, I don’t want to think about anything. I just want my brain to be totally blank for a while.