Sistah Pat

We got in late Sunday evening and it was total chaos.  We had to get my sister’s stuff and drop her off in Elizabethtown, then we had to sort through two weeks worth of stuff to find what belonged to Jake, Scout, Holly, and us.  It seemed like everyone needed something and I finally collapsed in bed at 1:00 a.m. after everyone had left.

I got up at 6:30 to get Andrew up and then drove him to work, came home, went back to bed and slept until 11:30!  I can’t believe I slept that long.  I was exhausted all day long yesterday and just straightened the house and watched TV.  Went to bed at 11:00 last night and I’m feeling better today.  I swear, I’ve been to Hawaii many times with a six hour time difference and killer 12 hour flights home and never felt as whipped as I did yesterday.  Two weeks with three grandkids under ten and a sister who’s almost totally incapacitated in close quarters was just too much.  We really overextended ourselves this time.  DH gave me a big hug after we got home and said, “Never again, Baby.  Never again….”  Yeah, I know, Honey.

So…where do I begin to catch up?  I don’t really think I can.  I think I’ll just begin with where I am.  Dietwise, I could care less.  I haven’t thought about it for more than two weeks and there’s no way I’m getting on the scale today.  In the two weeks that we were gone, I ate an entire gallon of Breyer’s coffee ice cream and had three mochachinos.  We had pizza for dinner twice and countless sandwiches and chips.  Oh yeah, on the road, the kids usually wanted Mickey D’s so let’s throw a few double cheeseburgers and fries in there for good measure.

I talked to the social worker yesterday and she filled me in on a lot of hesaid/shesaid stuff that left me feeling sick of the whole thing.  She doesn’t believe a lot of what DS has told her.  I don’t really blame her.  Some of the stuff DIL pulls is pretty hard to believe.  He told her that she worked as a stripper five years ago when they were separated and was arrested for prostitution.  The social worker said there was no record of that and accused him of lying.  DS took offense at her saying he was lying and got a bit of an attitude.  I told the social worker that it was, indeed, true and I don’t understand why it’s not in her record.  She admitted to it in court and it should be somewhere in her record.  I reminded the social worker (in a polite manner) that she also didn’t know that DIL had been married before and lost both kids from her first marriage.  She agreed that there seem to be a lot of blanks and said she still doesn’t have all the paperwork.  She feels strongly, however, that DS is not as innocent as he appears and says her husband is a police officer and they don’t just automatically arrest the man.  There has to be a reason.  I didn’t want to get into all of it.  I was exhausted yesterday and I didn’t feel like beating a dead horse.

She also told me that DIL said we have a child molester in the family and that I took my other two grandkids from their parents and took custody of them and one of them has Asburgers syndrome and he stares at Jake and Scout and it creeps them out and scares them.  That pissed me off bigtime.  My husband’s nephew, who lives in another state, was suspected of molesting a ten year old when he was fourteen.  We’ve never had anything to do with him and have only seen him at family gatherings three or four times in the last twenty years.  DIL was at one of these family gatherings and I told her I didn’t want this guy around any of the kids because of what happened.  I can’t believe she’d turn that situation around to make it look like we have child molesters coming out of the woodwork.  I only told her about it because I take no chances with kids safety and didn’t even want him around the kids.  I also told the social worker about Andrew and Steven needing help because of their ECE issues and how I enrolled them in the school where I work so I could make sure they get the help they need.  I told her that they stay here because they and their parents chose that option.  Not because I took them from their parents.  I told her I do not have custody of them and have never tried to get custody of them.  I told her that they’ve gone from failing school and hating it to being honor students and loving it.  I explained that Steven has Asburgers and he can get a kind of blank stare when he’s trying to think about what he wants to say and she was well aware of the symptoms and understood what I meant.  I also let her know that Jake and Scout adore the twins and are not “creeped out” or scared of them.

Overall, like I said, it just left me feeling sick of the entire mess.  I don’t need all the drama and this kind of lying, manipulating and mud-slinging leaves me feeling depressed and humiliated.  I don’t feel like I should have to defend my family against this kind of garbage and I feel degraded to even have to address it.  I told DS what was said and he told me that DIL has always said that she thinks Steven is kind of “creepy” because of the way he just stares at people sometimes.  I’m furious that she would be so shallow when she understands his disability and knows how hard he’s trying to concentrate when he gets that blank look.  In previous years, he would just mumble something and try to withdraw from social situations because they make him uncomfortable.  Now, he stops and thinks about what he wants to say and works hard to make sure it comes out the way he wants it to. I’m proud of the effort he makes now to think carefully and try to express his feelings instead of shutting down.

I don’t feel like writing anymore.  I’m getting depressed again.  Think I’ll clean house for a while.

1:00 - Okay, the house is presentable.  I’m still in a blue funk.  Several emails and messages from friends who want to get together but I don’t want to talk to anyone right now.  Wish I could pull out of this ugly mood but then, when I really think about it, things have been pretty crappy for quite a while now so maybe I’m entitled to be depressed.  God knows, I’ve got enough reasons to be.  Still, I promise not to whine anymore and won’t write until I can stop being such a wet blanket.  I’m going to turn off the phone and go watch TV on the couch.  I don’t want to talk to anyone right now.