I’m having a lovely day today.  The fog has been burnt off by the sun and it’s turned into an absolutely beautiful day.  I’ve been out for a walk to and from uni and at the moment I’ve got the TV on in the background and I’m finishing off the final parts of my Brownie Guide Leadership Qualification.  It’s one of those days where I get reflective, but in a nice way.  It’s one of those days I look at where I feel thankful for a lot of things and I feel proud of a lot of things and look at things I want to do.

I’m proud of my academic achievements.  Today was the prize giving ceremony at university so now I have a certificate to frame and put up on my wall.  (The cheque’s been put into my bank account and I’m especially thankful for that, it couldn’t have come at a better time!)  A lot of the people were in their graduation robes and it just reaffirmed how hard I need (and want) to work so that when it’s my turn to put on those robes next year for my graduation I can feel truly proud.

I’m thankful for my opportunity to get to university, for my parents being able to support me so I can focus completely on my studies next year.  I’m thankful for my health and my peace of mind.  I’m thankful for this new “at peace” mentality. I’m thankful for all you chicks here, who keep me on the straight and narrow and a place to tell my own story.

I’m making progress.  Maybe not weight wise or size wise right now (I don’t know, I’m not weighing or measuring any more) but I am feeling a lot happier.  I’m still committed to making a healthier, fitter me.  DP and I are budgetting so I can start a dance class next semester, which I’ve wanted to do since we moved here.  Plus I’m doing my Walk With Me! every day and still enjoying it.  I’ve come to the conclusion that if you want to move more it’s a good choice.  Yes, it’s basically a step counter, but it motivates me more than any other one I’ve had.

I want to keep moving, to keep making progress.  I want to change the world one person at a time :)  That’s the life mission I want to dedicate myself to

Days like today make me feel hopeful and ambitious and ready to take on anything.  I wish I could share the feeling with you, but since that doesn’t go through the internet cables too well here’s some encouragement instead:

You’re wonderful!  Being here, working as part of this community, you’re streets ahead.  That little sunny feeling you get when you lose a pound or push yourself to a new limit in your workout or the quiet satisfaction when you get your house spotless - internalise it, make it your little inner sun that brightens your mood when it just feels too hard.  Make use of what being a community means - come here when you need support and you’ll get it!  You’re turning your life around.  Be proud, be strong and well done!  You’re all inspirational

Mango x

Hey girlies!

Thank you for the comment BigProf, you’re right - any pound loss is so much better than one gained; I’m going to try to keep up the attitude

So yes, I went to see Angels and Demons last night.  It was enjoyable (not quite as good as the book) but I did like it.  I wont spoil the plot line but one line did make me think.  (To those who are religious: this post is not intended in any way to offend, but I have no where else to express these thoughts).

“Do you believe in God Mr. Langdon?

No!  I’m an academic…

I asked if you believe in God Mr. Langdon, not what man says about God.

I am, to a certain degree, an academic.  I believe in the power of science and the power of people.  For a good few years my belief system has been that I do not believe in an omniscient being.  I believe in each individual’s power to make a change for the good and that we should all try to fill our lives with as many experiences as we can.  But, if I’m honest, my heart has always wanted to believe there is a benevolent … thing, watching over us that guides our choices like a parent guides their child.

However, my scientific mind can’t combine this with some of the teachings of Christianity.  I refuse to condemn homosexuals or other religions.  I will not discriminate against the mentally ill nor those who choose not to believe in gods and instead place their faith in science.  The Book’s supposed to be taken literally, but that just doesn’t work.  I believe in evolution.  I believe that going to church makes you no more a Christian than sleeping in your garage makes you a car.

I believe I want to live a good life because I want to be a good person.  And then that quote brings me right back to the root of my dilemma.  Do I believe in God, rather than what man says about God?  Man is, after all, fallible.  My scientific self and spiritual self are at odds right now… who’d know a film could have such an effect?!

Moving on to less “deep” affairs, exercise was good today.  I came home from badminton absolutely dripping with sweat and puce!  I was playing against my dad, who in his teens played for Scotland in badminton.  While he’s in his mid-50’s now, he’s still in very good shape and makes me run around the court nonstop.  Definitely good calorie burn

I’m enjoying being at my parents.  Had a minor drama today where DP’s Xbox showed the red ring of death!  It’s supposed to be irreparable damage but my dad fixed it!  Somehow… it’s a technological miracle ;)  I’m going into Bravissimo tomorrow as well, I’m going to try and get a blouse for my interview on Friday.  Bravissimo design clothes to fit bigger-busted women like myself, so that it fits in the bust without gaping and across the waist without being baggy.  They’re a bit more expensive, but it is worth it for feeling so much more comfortable in your clothes!

Anyway, apologies for the disorganised lengthy post!

Good evening to you all

Mango x