It doesn’t take much, really, for something to make an impression on me.  Case in point: I was watching America’s Next Top Model last night, an early episode where they screen the semi-finalists.  Watching that I thought to myself, I want to be like Tyra!  She’s overcome a lot of issues to be completely body confident.  I sat there thinking that that’s why I’m losing this weight, so I can walk down the street feeling body confident, feeling like a 10!

Then, I watched Ugly Betty.  I love Ugly Betty by the way, love it!  In this episode, Betty ends up throwing a party just so her crush can play a gig.  He even dedicates a song to her, but then she walks in on him kissing Amanda.  As she sits outside crying, Daniel comes to speak to her and she cries saying that when her crush called her beautiful, she should have known he meant on the inside because she’s not on the outside.  And for some reason, that line just made me so sad because it strick a chord with a lot of my self-image issues.  It was a sad night.  I’m totally fine now, but I really need to work on my impressionability.

For the impact, I’m really sad for one of my good friends.  He’s just been dumped by his girlfriend who’s over in Camp America.  He was meant to be going too, but couldn’t front the money for it.  His last girlfriend broke up with him when she went to Camp America and we spoke before his new gf went and he told me he was terrified the same thing was happening.  I reassured him and tried to make him feel better, and now it’s happened again.  I feel really bad for him, I know how much he’s hurting and I just want to help him feel better. 

I was meant to start uni work today.  It’s not prescribed by our course, I just wanted to get a head start after last term’s debacle with exams but I’ve still not got there.  I’ve been looking over the materials the psychologist I’m volunteering with gave me though, which is something I suppose.

The last two days I’ve been sitting at 11st 0lbs, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to push it into the 10st bracket for Thursday.  I’ll definitely be there by next week though!  When I do get there, DP’s buying me Twilight on DVD.  I’ve seen it at the cinema, but I want to watch it again lol.  Today’s eating hasn’t been to great because I got a tuna mayo sweetcorn wholemeal baguette and a chocolate square :s DP’s making bolognaise for tea, but we’re having it with turkey mince - beef mince is just too expensive (points wise).

As a result of me doing very little I don’t have much to say to blog about, sorry, but hopefully there will be more goss soon!

Mango x

Sunny thank you for your comment!  You always make me smile.  Just wanted to let you know I’ve not not been reading your blog, my browser just crashes when I go to comment on it Just so you know!  And way to go on your amazing weight loss; if anyone’s the role model it’s you!

Mango x

I don’t know if that’s the right French, but either way I’m back safe on Scottish soil and a happy about it.  How have you all been these last two weeks?  Well, let me tell you about France.

France was lovely, warm and sunny most days with rain a couple.  We stayed in a town called Aujac, relatively close to Saintes and Cognac.  We lived in a big gite with my aunt and uncle and my parents.  For one week my cousin joined us, for the second my aunt and uncle on my dad’s side. Around Aujac they grow only three crops; maize, grapes for wine and sunflowers.  That was one of my favourite things - the rows and rows of sunflowers that were so bright and yellow.  Happy flowers

The holiday was nice, it was good to get away.  It was just unfortunate that we were so far away from civilization.  Unfortunately DP and I aren’t old enough/haven’t been driving long enough for it to be cost-effective for us to hire our own car so we were reliant on other people, which is difficult, and we weren’t in walking or cycling distance of… well, anything really.  My family enjoy shopping (not a trait I share, I’m an in-grab-out kind of girl) so a lot of our days were visiting and trawling round towns.  Some were nice but in the heat of the day the last thing I wanted to be doing was trawling shops :s

So in some ways it’s felt like I’ve really not been on holiday but in others I’ve had a nice time.  One of the best things was that I weighed in at 11st 1lbs this morning - 1lb lower than when I left, which I really couldn’t believe after the diet we had on holiday.  Trying to get affordable food for 8 people who all have different dietary needs is ridiculous-pizza, pasta and pastry was what I consisted on.  So that just goes to show the difference exercise can make!

Now I’m home I’m back to tracking and feeling so much better for it, and DP has started tracking too!  He can’t make meetings because of his working and study hours, but he’s using the resources I have to make a difference to his wait too.  So now I get the joys of proving him wrong - I really can lose weight consistently - and beating him at it too!

Smiles to all of you,

Mango x