I think it’s funny that I have filed this blog under my humour category in “My Favourites”. Is there something wrong with filing a personal blog under humour? I think it says something about my approach to life.

LindaT (as usual) is right in that I can exercise until I drop and I won’t lose the weight until I start doing some things around what I actually fuel this body with. I can’t run a Ferrari engine on chocolate and fried food – not that I eat chocolate and fried food, but you get the idea. My downfall is (and ladies, who hasn’t heard this one before?) Portion Size. I actually eat fairly healthily – I just eat too much. Oh, and I probably drink too much too if it comes to that… not just the wine but my inability to make great food choices once I’ve had the wine. Many a cheesecake has come into my life after one nice glass too many of Pinot Grigio. And cheese. Man, I love cheese just a little too much. It’s like an abusive relationship that I just can’t seem to quit.

On the up side, I love exercise. Well, to be honest, I don’t love it so much as I love what it allows me to do. I was at the gym this morning, feeling fine, and I ended up doing an hour of cardio. I could actually have spent the entire morning there just doing exercise. But you could put some of that down to the fact that it was a lovely sunny day and it seems a shame I have to spend it at work. But I do like the feel of pushing myself… and the deep breathing… and the way my mind just goes to its happy working place when I work out. I like lifting weights and stretching and doing hard things with a medicine ball. I sometimes think I should hire a PT just to get me to do those things I don’t like as much. I’d like to be more flexible. I could always stand to be stronger.

Working out does not let me eat whatever I want and get away with it. That’s a lie. But working out does allow me to sail through physicals with zero cholesterol problems and no blood sugar problems and no other problems that I should have at this weight. It’s not a Get Out of Jail Free card – and I’m afraid that one day it will catch up with me, even with the working out and the not eating fried food and all the other things I pat myself on the back for.

I’m 47 years old and 180 lbs. I have arthritis in my knees that isn’t helped by the weight. I have a family history of diabetes that I’m beating the odds on so far. How long will this golden ticket be valid for?

I have to stop kidding myself and start getting motivated again. 20 % is exercise and 80% is the eating. It’s time I start with that other 80% again.