But then again, they always do on the first day.
Did Day 1 Level 1 of Jillian’s 30 day shred this morning, then ran 0.5 miles on the treadmill. Going to spinning in an hour, and have dinner planned.
So I live in a very old apartment building and definitely can’t do the jumping that Jillian asks for at 5:30am without making some very angry neighbors. I manage to keep my heart rate up, and I think that’s all you really need… I certainly don’t want to lose out on the benefits of the 30ds program, but at the same time, I think I am probably getting enough (better) cardio throughout the day with running and spinning, so I’m not that worried.
Now, if only I found the motivation to clean my apartment. Or study. I feel like I can only concentrate on one thing at a time. Sigh.
The last 2 weeks have been an absolute shitshow. I got really stressed with exams and school and work and stopped exercising and decided it was a good idea to eat pizza and guacamole and wine every day. Like seriously - the people at the grocery must have thought I was insane as I bought 4 avocados and a bottle of wine EVERY day. The worst part was, every night I would feel sick and throw out everything unhealthy and then go out and buy more the next day! I swear, I must have spent over $500 on groceries in the last two weeks. All for me. Unacceptable.
I’ve been thinking a lot about what works for me and what doesn’t. I don’t think I do well with insane calorie counting; it works for a few days, but then I go crazy and binge. Obviously. I like exercise. I like healthy foods. So the new plan is to exercise like a madwoman and eat healthfully but not obsess about calories.
The plan, you ask?
Every day: 30 day shred
Weekdays: running at the school gym (0.5 miles this week; increasing by .25 miles per week)
Tuesdays and Thursdays: pilates
Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays: spinning
I also bought a new scale with bioelectrical impedance analysis (body fat %). Horror of all horrors: 38.5% fat; 176.4lbs. Waist measurement: 36 inches.
Goal #1: Lose 1% body fat per week (I don’t know if that’s attainable… we shall see)
Goal #2: Weigh 160 by the middle of March, when I am going to a bachelorette party and seeing a bunch of old friends I haven’t seen in years
Goal #3: Absolutely no unplanned trips to the grocery store.
I feel like I make these grand statements every few months, and it’s true… I need to find something that works for me. I hope this is it.
WHY can’t I remember that bingeing makes me feel disgusting and sick?
I had an exam yesterday, and afterward I just lost control. I drove to the grocery store in a stupor and wandered around picking up anything and everything I thought I might like to eat. I got home around 4pm, ate a whole bag of rice chips, had three glasses of wine, had 9 corn tortilla quesadillas, and a 4oz log of goat cheese with crackers.
I ate all this by 5pm.
At 5:15, I threw out the remnants and put on my gym clothes, and made it to spinning at 6. However, that ginormous quantity of food made me feel so, sooo nauseous that I had a terrible ride. Then I went home and went to bed.
I know today is a new day, blah blah blah, but I just binged last weekend and felt so sick - how did I forget that disgusting feeling?
…as long as I’m getting thinner. (I LOVE Lily Allen!)
Had a great day yesterday; plan to have a great week this week. I’d really love to bust through the 170s, but they’re giving me a bit of a hard time.
I have a massive exam this afternoon that I have not prepared for at all (ughhhh) but I have lunch packed and dinner planned and as long as I don’t die in the exam, everything will be fine :) And, hopefully, I can get out early enough to make it to spinning and pilates tonight!
I think I effectively halted my binge monster yesterday. I had a great day calorie wise (under 1300) and finally got all the crap from the 3 previous days out of my system (literally). This morning I saw 174.8 (lowest last week was 174.2, so I’m happy that I didn’t do any real damage!).
Today I plan to exercise for 3 hours - spinning and pilates this AM, and another spinning class this PM. It’s a major study day today, so I look forward to the exercise breaks, and with my class schedule I rarely get to attend the morning classes.
Recap of Week of 1/10:
High weight: 177.6
Low weight: 174.2
Exercised 5 days
-Circuit training: 4 days
-Spinning: 3 days
-Pilates: 2 days
-4 days under 1400
-3 days of alcohol/food binge (3000-6000 calories each…eek!)
…and I really shouldn’t be. It’s probably boredom and stress since I’m supposed to be studying all day today, but I legitimately feel hungry. But I know if I start eating now, it will turn into a giant binge that will encompass the rest of the evening, and I just can’t handle that now (especially after my last 3 days of caloric hell).
Last night was interesting. I don’t know why I’m writing about it, except that maybe I haven’t talked to any of my friends about it and just want to hash it out somewhere. A classmate of mine texted me in the afternoon wanting to know if I wanted to grab a drink and take a study break later on. Of course I did! Turns out, he picked me up at my apartment, we went to a pretty trendy bar, it was just the two of us, and he paid for my 2 drinks. I’m probably reading way, wayyy too much into it, but I feel like that was a date. Hmmm.
I enjoy coming across motivational quotes, especially ones relating to weight loss, and found this:
“Everything you want in the world is right outside your comfort zone.”
I’m back. I just read some of my posts from a few months ago and am really, really, incredibly pissed at myself for falling off the wagon so damned hard.
So, like every January for the past 15 years, I pledge this year to be different. I had a rough couple of first weeks but I’m recommitted. I know that there will be good days and there will be not so good days, but that’s no excuse for making dozens of poor choices in a row.
I’m currently experiencing a giant amount of GI distress based on the last 3 day bingefest, but that’s in the past now. Except for my recurrent trips to the bathroom that remind me why I need to eat healthfully.
So. My kitchen is stocked with healthy foods; I have soup cooking in the crock pot; I’m doing this. For reals.
Starting weight - somewhere around 175 (again, kicking myself because I was 1 freaking 59 in September. Ugh.
Goal weight - 135, but I’m not in a hurry as I’m making a lifestyle change.
Plan - 1000-1400 calories per day (1400 is BMR); circuit training at home weekday mornings; 4 spinning classes minimum per week and 2 pilates classes minimum per week.
Let’s do this!
Despite my oh-so-inspiring post on October freaking 4th, I have not done a damned thing to change my eating habits. I need to stop buying wine. I need to throw away the butter. I need to go to the gym. I need to stop eating when I’m not hungry.
So. I’ve been very far away from the wagon I fell off of early in September. I hit 159.0 sometime after Labor Day, and have been bouncing around in the mid 160s ever since. I think I only exercised 4 times in the entire month, and had some seriously bad eating days.
I’m going to adopt a new strategy. I’m not going to weigh myself unless I’ve had three excellent days of eating. And, I’m changing my rewards structure:
Good eating 5x/week: I can have wine with dinner one night
Good eating 6x/week: $100 towards clothing
Exercise 4x/week: tanning
Exercise 5x/week: massage
By “good eating” I’m going to try to stick to 1200 calories on days I don’t exercise, and 1600 on days I do exercise. I’ve started using tdp again, and, per usual, I’m shocked at how calories add up. I was at 1677 today and I thought I had a pretty damn good day before I counted everything. Ugh.
But, in other news, I ran my first 5k yesterday! I ran nearly the whole thing, except for this KILLER hill in the last mile. Seriously, it was so bad that a lot of the “better” and faster runners were walking and huffing too. I finished in 40:40, which is not too far off my projections… I am very slow. However, I had a REALLY good time and already signed up for another 5k (Run Like Hell where you’re to dress and run in costume for Halloween!)
Also, I HAD to buy new jeans last weekend because my old ones finally ripped a nice hole through the crotch. I bought AE size 8! In November, I could barely squeeze into 12s, and I was stuck in 10s for quite some time, and I can kind of tell that the 8s are going to be big soon - they’re pretty baggy if I don’t wear them straight out of the dryer. It’s really my stomach that’s got me all hot and bothered - I know you can’t spot reduce, but that’s the one part of me that I really, really want to shrink.
I’m going to California again on Friday (surprise for my mom’s 50th) and hate that I haven’t lost a pound since I was there last month. My parents are just so… invested in my personal weight loss journey that I don’t want them to think I’ve given up. Truth is, I gave up for most of the month of September, but this week begins the re-focused experience.
Plan: exercise every morning at the rec center this week (running and swimming); eat very well and according to plan; don’t touch the scale.
So, in my swine-flu induced quarantine, I’ve finally gotten around to updating and uploading my photos into Picasa. I’ve been going through pictures from the last 6-7 years, and am absolutely floored by how overweight I am in some of them. It’s really sad, because I’ve KNOWN I’ve had to lose weight for 10+, 20+ years, and all these pictures seem to show that I didn’t care. But I did. And I do.
In better news, I was back to my low of 159.8 this morning. With how little I’ve been eating, I *should* be lower tomorrow. I really, really need a massage and am thinking of getting one when I hit 158 and switching with the tanning since I’m still pretty brown from my trip to Cali last weekend.
I think I can leave my quarantine tomorrow, since my temperature has been somewhat normal today; I’m still feeling pretty weak and dizzy, so I don’t know how much I can exercise, but going for a walk sure sounds nice.
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