Happy Friday

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This week has been really hectic with hubby being out everynight till at least 4 am doing his fraternity stuff. Luckily it will all be over by tomorrow at noon. Today I plan on more cleaning. I was so annoyed yesterday. The dishes have been piling up in the sink and the deal was that hubby puts away and i wash. Well i couldnt wash because there were still dishes drying and i got really frustrated. So yesterday i spent an hour putting dishes away, scrubbing dishes and getting the mold off (YUCK!) drying, washing, and drying again, I cleaned the dog create and folded it up. I have decided that they are old enough to roam around the kitchen and at night i will put them in a create. I just hope there wont be any nasty suprises when i get home. We tested it out yesterday. WE went out for 30 minutes and they were good, then we left for an hour and they grabbed my dish towl and ripped it. Today is the real test… 2 and a half hours. On top of that i couldnt find one of their kongs and i cant give them just one cuz they will fight over it. So im hoping they play with the dish towl and the jingle balls. I need to buy more indestructable toys for them to keep them busy.

On the diet front.. i started out on tuesday weighing 250. Today is friday and i weight 243. So in 4 days ive dropped 7lbs. I love the first week of dieting. Although unrealistic the weight drop is amazing and an ego/ motivation booster. Today is my treat day so hubby and i are going to subway for lunch.  I went on the diet again because i want to be in the 100s. Also i saw that i was getting a double chin again. I hate my wedding pictures because they were taken when i was at my heaviest (270lbs). I actually want to renew our vows again in 10-15 years and look amazingly hott LOL

I convinced hubby to wait on getting a car. Although we desperately need one we need to pay off some defalted credit cards first becuase its really hurting hubbys credit and by the fault mine. We are 8k in debt. Which doesnt sound like alot but hubbys student loans are going to hit in Dec cuz he graduates next month and thats going to make us 32k in debt… and we only make 32k a year combined! I am so stressed by fianances. Hubby doesnt even realize cuz i take care of everything. I have sat him down and told him how it is but he just cant seem to get the magnitude of the situation.

the first day is always the hardest

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Well right now im watching the biggest loser and fighting to stay out of the kitchen. In about 30 minutes i plan on waking up the hubby, having our “fun” time for the day, take a shower with him and get pretty. The hubbys going to go do fraternity stuff till like 5am and i will watch a movie and sleep. I bought my food and snacks for the week this afternoon. So i am all prepared for food for tomorrow. Breakfast is on the counter i am having a double chocolate chocolate chip muffin (weight watchers style 3pts) lunch is mac and cheese and dinner is yet to be decided. healthy snacks are readily available when needed. Its a new beginning ladies!

My new goal is to be 200 by the time we start trying to have a baby… which will be sometime in December. So i need to lose 50lbs in a little over 8 months.

got on the scale

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and the damage is done. I gaied TWENTY pounds in thirty days. Its back on track and there is no time like the present. I already ate 10 points today so im going to have to wait until later to eat the rest. But today is the first day back on track.

Hubby and i are doing fine. Today is day 7 of straight up “fun” everyday. It really is working. We are so much closer. We even do it more then once a day sometimes. And i have to say there has not been a day where i didnt want to.

Money is still a major issue. We owe so much and there is not enough money coming in at all.

Things are working out

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I apreciate all the wonderful advice i have gotten from my friends here and at home. I had a long talk with hubby. Well mainly it was me talking. I have realized that hubby sucks at communicating. I say i want a baby soon and he goes ok cuz he wants to make me happy meanwhile he is thinking im not ready its not going to work now. I have realized that i need to ask questions when i want something to make sure it is something we both want in order for me to understand him and for us to communicate effectively. So the baby plans are on hold for about a year or so. Which i cant say i mind so much because it will give me a chance to finish school.

Another thing that i realized is that i dont have a life outside of hubby. And that is something i am working on. When hubby and i moved in together i stopped painting. Well i bought an easel and its all set up and ready for my creativity. I am also going on a vacation to the beach with my best friend and her 2 daughters for 2 days sometime this month.

And the comments about more “fun” time with hubby to get closer together is an awesome idea. I have an extremely low sex drive and i know he feels neglected in that area. I am making an effort to make sure that the neglect stops. You are right its 20 minutes out of my day and if it makes us closer and saves our marriage it is worth it 1,000 times over.

Ill admit it this morning i was 15 minutes late for work cuz i gave hubby some surprise fun time.

We have a long road ahead of us with everything against us but we can make it if we try.

My heart is breaking

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I am almost 99% positive hubby wants a divorce. We have only been married 7 months. How can this be happening. He means everything to me but he feels that we cant work it out. I guess I never really told him how much he means to me. I just dont know what to do. Hes currently at work and i made myself attractive for him. I dont want to try to hard but i dont want to lose him either. WHAT DO I DO????

stuff

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Welp,

Today I am back on track so far. Ive been really motivated lately. I have made first degree in my coven. School is going ok. Hubby and I are talking about moving in the summer. We are now trying to save up enough money to get hubby a junk car and moving as well as first and last months rent. We shall see what happens. Lots of changes. RIght now im home for lunch and have to put away my laundry and get the car down to the mechanics. After it just having 1,600 worth of repairs the fuses blew and now i dont have lights on my gear shift or my dash board.

Ok thats it for now. Have a great day everyone!