200
Why is it so damn hard to find a middle ground? I can’t help but slide to one extreme or the other.
Filed under: daily ponderings on April 25th, 2011 | No Comments »
AGHHHHHHHH!!!
I am ready to lose my damn mind!!!
today, THREE DIFFERENT PEOPLE at work asked me either a)Are you pregnant again? or b)when are you due??
2/3 of them actually pointed to my chub.
What is wrong with these people?!?!?!?!
ATTENTION CO-WORKERS. I HAD MY BABY SIX MONTHS AGO. I AM NOT PREGNANT AGAIN. THANK YOU AND GO EFF YOURSELVES.
Filed under: wtf on April 11th, 2011 | Comments Off
uuurgh…
The benefit to being sick is that you really don’t feel like eating anything. Dieting doesn’t seem so hard anymore 
The drawback to being sick is that, you know, you’re sick.
Filed under: daily ponderings on April 5th, 2011 | No Comments »
around and around
I’m having a bit of an emotional day today. It’s a swarm of worry, love, fear, panic, and guilt. Let me just say that it’s been difficult not to hit the bucket of ice cream in the back of my freezer. I’m feeling kind of overwhelmed, actually.
I broke out of the 220s today but I can’t even bring myself to be happy about that.
A family member is in induced labor as we speak and her progress is mirroring that of mine with my son, that is to say, it isn’t going so well. I keep repeating to myself over and over again that every labor is different but I’m finding it hard to suppress everything I felt that day and the months following. I’m drumming my fingers and biting my lip and just waiting for any new piece of news. I’m bracing myself. I wish I could turn down my empathy but I just can’t.
I’m sure the fact that I’m pmsing accounts for at least 30% of the way I’m feeling today.
I’m completely stiff and sore from cleaning my house yesterday. I can’t believe how out of shape I actually am.
All I want to do today is to hold my breath and pray.
When DH gets home we are going to go pick out french doors for our patio. hopefully that will help distract me a little bit.
ETA: Mom and baby are doing great. Glad to hear it. My heart feels much lighter.
Filed under: daily ponderings on March 31st, 2011 | No Comments »
In Like A Lion, Out Like a Lamb…
Lu was born the first week of October and her pregnancy was definitely a trial. My postpartum experience with James was an emotional one, my experience with Lu was much more physically trying. I had the worst back pain and it seemed like even lifting my 7 lb baby was an Olympic event. I fell more and more out of shape in the months following. My doctor insisted exercise was the key to making my back feel better, but I couldn’t understand how I was going to exercise if I couldn’t even get up out of bed without cringing in pain. I got better after I returned to work and returned to a somewhat normal routine, but by this time all my bad habits were in full force. It was the holidays, I was eating like crazy and not working out at all. I didn’t much seem to care. My postpartum size was a size 14 and I was pretty ok with that. And then I started getting bigger. And bigger. Only recently did I reach my breaking point when I’d realized that of the 80lbs I lost 3 years ago, I’d gained back 75% of it. That’s 60 lbs. I’d gained 60lbs in a little under 2 years. I realize I have the pregnancy to blame for some of it, but I mostly used it as an excuse.
My daughter is about to be six months old and I still weigh the same as I did when I was full term. That’s a hard pill to swallow.
In the past 10 days I have already dropped about 6 lbs. I’m pleased but I don’t expect this rate to continue unless I succumb to the bad behaviour I indulged in last time I was dieting. I’m not proud of it. I don’t want to find myself there again. I need some help finding a middle ground.
This community helped me so much last time. I’m hoping to find it again.
Filed under: daily ponderings on March 30th, 2011 | 1 Comment »
mostly unrelated frustration.
This blog has become a complete sanctuary for spammers. I wouldn’t care so much if I didn’t get an email every time a comment was posted. I disabled email alerts and changed a few settings hoping to get it under control. I really do NOT want to have to delete this blog without informing you guys about what’s going on. I’d restart and find you again, yes, but I’d rather not go through the trouble.
In diet related news, I’m 23 lbs away from my original high weight. help.
DH and I are starting to get back on the right track, but I mourn for the body I had for a short period of time. After having yet another c-section, I imagine this time around is going to be more difficult. I need to get back in the habit of posting. It helped me a lot.
I’m using My Fitness Pal, also, to help me track calories. If anyone would like to add me, it should be easy to figure out my username.
Tonight I’m going to make Venetian Apricot Chicken. Yeah, like at The Olive Garden. Boy am I happy they keep recipes on their website!
Zumba was a lot more fun when I was 185 lbs. Now I just feel like I’m going to die.
Filed under: daily ponderings, wtf on March 27th, 2011 | No Comments »
Yo.
What’s happenin, hot stuff?
Filed under: Uncategorized on January 6th, 2011 | 1 Comment »
Hi guys. I’m sorry I haven’t kept up with this thing. I’ve started a blog here that has very little to do with my diet but a lot to do with my life. If you’re interested.
Filed under: Uncategorized on August 15th, 2009 | No Comments »
I’m sorry guys, I’m the worst blogger ever. I have had so much going on recently.
sitting pretty at 172 again. I think my body just plain likes it here. Am starting to come to terms with that.
I think my self perception is really out of whack. People describe me as being thin but curvy and I just don’t know how to handle that. I almost feel better when somebody tells me my ass looks fat in that skirt. (or whatever)
I think this could be a problem.
Filed under: Uncategorized on July 4th, 2009 | 1 Comment »