How I hate thee, High Fructose Corn Syrup. I have been trying to avoid you like the plague and yet I forget how devious you are. How, you ask? Well for one thing, I didn’t know that you were hiding in both my raisin bran and my bran flakes. How dare you?! You were also hiding in Mrs. Stratton’s chicken salad, so I decided to make my own, free of you, only to discover that you were in my pickle relish and mayonnaise… the nerve.

HFCS, you are not wanted. Please stay away or I will take action.

Seriously, why do they have to put that crap in everything?