Losing to LIVE…

So I lost 2lbs this week!!! This is a huge accomplishmentfor me. I have been going in the wrong direction for a few weeks now but I think that I am finally getting back on track. Last week I only had a couple of slips. On day I had to go to the bank (inside the grocery store) and the donuts were calling to me so I got one. I think that losing the weight this week has let me know that even if i fall of the wagon, so to speak, I can get right back on and not continue down the wrong path. Every second is a new beginning and I think that I have forgotten that in the past couple of weeks. So no more thinking well I was already “bad” today might as well keep it up the day is already ruined. One donut can not break me, but a day of bad eating can really set you back. I say this every week but I think this week its for real. My surgery is coming up and I need to be back on so that I can be my healthiest self for a good recovery.

Just so you know this post is going to share a little TMI.

So I went to the DR yesterday for my yearly physical and everything went great. Except for the fact that I had to sit in the exam room naked wearing a little paper gown for 45 Min before the doctor came in. I was getting so mad but what are you going to do. Not open the door and ask what is going on. I mean that gown is tiny and lets face it I’m not. Anyway during my appt I had to talk to my DR about *TMI* the little cyst like things I get on the inside of my thighs. They are dark almost black with blood and stuff and they hurt to high heaven sometimes. Sometimes they don’t bother me at all but sometimes they get raised and hurt so bad I can hardly walk. My Dr said it was from my thighs rubbing together and that I was doing good with my weight loss and that in time they would go away. She did tell me that when they get raised and hurt I can sterilize a needle and poke it to relieve the pressure. OMG  do you know how much that hurts!!! I did it last night and thought I was going to pass out in the bathroom. That skin is thin and sensitive!! I do have to say that today I feel much better and I am going to be able to go to the gym and work out. So I guess that is just another thing I have to look forward to when I lose more weight.  No more poking !! 

So sorry for the gross story but I really needed to get that out. I am doing much better with my food this week. I don’t expect to lose this week because of last weekend, but I do plan on having a good week so hopefully that means a good number next week.

So this weekend was not as spot on as I wanted it to be. Hil and I were both feeling rather lazy so we didn’t work out at all this weekend. We basically sat around and played computer games and watched TV all weekend. What a waste! We were also WAY off on our eating. When I say way off I mean eating for 4 way off. I am not sure exactly what happened but I do know that I don’t want to go there again. It seems to me that I make myself promises every week to do better but then something (my self control) always gets in the way. I think that this time I am really going to do it. Well at least for the next few weeks, seeing as how I just spent all of my extra money eating out in two days. What was I thinking!!

Yesterday Hil and I went for a nice long walk and had a nice chat about things. I think it is starting to click into place for me so here is to a new and better week.

So its been one of those weeks. I haven’t really felt like doing anything. I haven’t posted in almost 2 weeks I think partly because I didn’t have anything good to say. I didn’t really feel like blogging about how crappy I felt or how much I hated this diet at times. Its strange that you can love something and hate it at the same time. I hate the planning and having to think about every little thing. I have a ton going on right now and with this added it just seems like to much sometimes. On the other hand I love what sticking to the plan does for my life. I like having more energy, noticing a difference in how I look and just the over all changes that I have made to my health. So how do you juggle the good with the bad? Do you just let yourself have the bad weeks or do you let yourself have a really bad day and then get on with things? I am planning on having a good week this week. I have said in the past that I was going to plan my week and stick to it but this week I am going to actually do it. I have the weekend off and I am planning on cleaning house and cleaning out my cupboards to see the food I have and what I need to get while grocery shopping this weekend. I am also going to get some frozen lunches for work. I don’t know why but packing a lunch is hard for me but if I have something easy to throw together it goes a lot better. So here is to a new week hope you all are doing better than me.