Today is my 3rd day and i’m still doing well. Almost a little proud of myself. Aside from the feeling that my life has turned upside down in the last 3 hours i’m doing well. Going to get ready for work and turn my phone off once I get there. Hoping all this stress doesn’t bring back my palpatations that i have had in recent years. Seems stress brings them on. Hoping i get to work and am so busy that i forget about it all…for at least 8 hours.
I made it through my first day without eating crap food when i came home. I tried to have a grapefruit…that didn’t work well so i had a bowl full of cooked carrots. My favorite veggie treat :) I also just started a little mini challenge today.
Starting today…and for the next 21 days….
I don’t even know where to begin. I’ve always struggled with my weight. Right out of high school i was in a very abusive relationship and became anorexic. I dropped to my lowest weight of 147 and got so many compliments from my family and friends. If they only knew how I got to that weight. It seemed like no one noticed…and it was my secret. I moved away 4 years later to get away from my abuser and gained weight once I got into a stable relationship. I moved home 4 years later, and lost weight again. Only to lose it again when going through a divorce. My highest weight was 220. After my divorce I lose 65 lbs and got down to 155. Now I am back at roughly 180. I’m so severly depressed. I don’t know where to start. I don’t want to fall back into my old habits…but i feel myself doing it. I work somedays 14 hours and do not eat all day until usually 7pm at work. That meal consists of a graham cracker. I am on my feet all day long taking care of patients and residents and really do not have the time to eat. Until I get home…then I sit at this computer and eat. That is my downfall. I looked up some exercises to do at home, in the mornings before I leave for work, and plan on starting tomorrow…I just need to know more about how to use this site, as I have used others in the past that really didn’t help, and ideas on how to control my eating when I get home at night. I need the support more than anything. If anyone has any ideas for me I would greatly appreciate it. Not even sure I’m posting on the thread I should be. I should also add that I have been on zoloft for a year now and recently changed jobs and am between insurances so i haven’t been on my meds for a month now. Its really effecting me. I need to get back on them as soon as possible. That might make this weight loss a little easier…or at least get me out of this funk.