I hope Christmas 2009 found everyone healthy and happy!! I had a nice holiday with family & lots of food : )

I ate way too much of the food prepared by my sister. I will not get on the scale!!

The bright side is that my sister bought me a new coat. It is a nice wool overcoat which was badly needed. I got a bit nervous when I took off the hanger. It was a size 20. I know that because my arms are so huge I must have a size 24. I was a bit embarassed when I old my sister, it won’t fit : ( She and my niece encouraged me to try it on. I did and it easily slid on!!

It may sound crazy to a size 12 but I have never been so happy!! It was the first sign that my eating plan is working. Beyond the number on the scale which was hovering around 12 lbs down last time I weighed.

Over the next week the plan is to keep avoiding fast food. I will eat food prepared at home. I am debating whether to begin my ediets meals again or to continue on my own.

I made a big mistake. My father asked how much the meals are costing and I told him against my better judgement. Now he keeps telling me I can do it on my own, he will cook for me etc. The bottom line is that I could have done it on my own for the last 16 years. But I didn’t.

Anywho, I will be making the decision over the next few days . . . what should I do? Ediets gave me 16 lbs in 6 weeks. On my own (despite the holidays) I have gained back 2 lbs on my own. I think I have made my decisions. I am going back to ediets. I gotta do what works for me, even if it costs $400/month : (.

I put my meal delivery program on hold starting today. My plan is to eat on my own for a couple of weeks. I will not be eating fast food and will focus on healthy home cooked meals. The problem, I don’t know where to start. I still have ediets.com so I will access the site for some ideas.

My biggest issue is that I have spent so long eating the wrong thing (heavily processed, fast foods) that I really don’t know what I like. My first thought is chicken. I told my sister I would buy a bag of frozen chicken breasts. She suggested I try the boneless chicken thighs becasue they have more flavor.

I’m thinking if I can work with chicken and veggies for dinner–what about lunch??? My old stand by is cold cuts but that can get old really quickly. I will troll for some good soup ideas. I don’t want to do canned soup everyday–I know that I will end up eating out for lunch. If I can make a good soup and find some good apples I think I can make it thorugh the remainder of this work week.

Breakfast will be easy. I love tuna on a toasted english muffin.

I will try to make it fun. I used to love cooking but for some reason I have not made a meal for myself in over a year.

As of today I am down 15 lbs. That’s up one from last week but I’m not sweating it. Next week will be better.

I have been loose on my eating and have enjoyed a few nights out in the last couple weeks. I was almost afraid to get on the scale. I knew I wouldn’t loose but was horrified that I would have gained everything I’d lost.

I got back on my eating plan a week ago and have not been having my 2 serving of veggies or my dairy. I know that I will be more satisfied when I do this but, for whatever reason I have not. I have not been going to bed early like I wanted either.

Despite my mishaps I am down 16 lbs as of today!!!

I have been less than strick with myself since Thanksgiving. It’s almost like I was giving in to the notion that the holidays are there so you can on 5 pounds. That may be the case if you don’t spend the whole year eating what you want when you want to : ( Ugggg!

I am writing the day before my weekly weigh in to convince myself that I won’t be sad or disappointed when I realize that I have set myself back 2 weeks. This is because while I have slipped off of the plan I am still not eating the way I did before ediets (dark times).

I am good with breakfast and I am even okay thorugh lunch. My problem time is and always has been the evening. My plan: to go to bed earlier.

I have friends who are in bed by 8:00 pm every night. I can do that . . . right?

I don’t know. I am a TV watcher and I know well that if I go to bed at 8 I may be asleep at 9:00 but you’d better believe I will be up at 11:00 looking for something to snack on. Oh well, I’m going to give it a try tonight.

It’s 1:00. I was off work today. I had my ediet yogurt parfait for breakfast and spaghetti & meatballs for lunch. Okay, the spaghetti was supposed to be dinner but, as long as I eat a lunch meal for dinner I should be okay.

The writing is helping a lot. I may start to write more often since, for the 5 minutes it took me to write this I have eaten anything : )

Also, I have to pat myself on the back a little. I went to my sister’s and she had a tray full of nachos on the stove. I knew that I wanted to sit in front of a plate full, oink twice and bury my head. Instead, I painted my fingernails while she ate. Once my nails were dry, and the nachos were cold, I ate 2. Had they been hot I would have eaten them all–instead, when she asked if I was done I said yes. She wadded them up in foil and tossed them. Also, she baked brownies while I was there. I left right before they came out of the oven.

One day I will be able to watch other people eat and not want to join in . . . maybe tomorrow : )