losing it

just another 3fc blog

change February 18, 2014

Filed under: Uncategorized — kisskiss @ 10:36 am

weight: 136

My brother is doing awesome. They took out his respirator, he’s off of the morphine. He looks great. In fact, the doctors say he is doing better than they expected. They told us he may get to come home by the end of the week (may be sooner). He looks so alert, he’s talking and laughing. Don’t get me wrong, he is in pain and he is struggling in his own way. But, for what he’s been through he is making an amazing recovery. I can’t wait to have him home. In a moment of family bonding and unity, my cousins and uncles and aunts all decided to re-do my brother’s home. We started this weekend by priming and painting and moving furniture. But, we didn’t expect him to get out so soon, so we are rushing to buy the furniture we had planned. We want him to come home to a beautiful and relaxing home. He’s going to have a hard time adjusting to his scars and what he went through, so the least we could do is make him comfortable and happy.

My boyfriend asked me to move in with him. Not just move in, move away. He got a job opportunity and he would like me to go with him. Then, this happened with my brother and we said we’d hold off until June. So, I could potentially be moving out of state with my boyfriend. It’s so weird and random, but it feels very right. I’m very unhappy at my current job, and I feel like I need a change. I told him we would go. We are so excited to live together. It’s going to be so different if this happens. Right now, we are considering staying in LA until the end of the year, but no matter what we are moving in together. The only reason we are considering staying in cali is because I don’t know what my brother’s recovery is going to look like right now, and I don’t want to commit to moving if he is going to need me.

I don’t know how I am going to tell my parents. While they are not super conservative, living with a boy (who I’ve been dating for only a year) is going to be hard for them. I’ve never moved in with someone (he hasn’t either despite almost being engaged about 7 years ago). But, it feels so right. I don’t know how long couples usually wait, but moving in seems like the next logical step. I’m already staying at his place about 4 nights anyway, I have some of my stuff over there. It also makes sense because I really want to leave my job. I could help him with his business, or I could also look for another career. Moving away seems so unlike me, and yet exactly like me. I want to take that chance.