losing it

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Boy advice? help :( April 11, 2013

Filed under: Uncategorized — kisskiss @ 7:25 am

weight: 176.1

I’d like to ask your opinion. I am chatting with this other boy. he lives in NY and he is planning on moving to LA in June (job opportunity).

He seems really nice. Except…… after a while of messaging, I let him know that I had lost a lot of weight. I tell my potential dates before we go out. I figure if they have a problem with it, then we don’t waste our time on a pointless date.

His response was “No!  you diet? I don’t think people should diet. I wish people would be more accepting of their body”. My response was “well, I don’t consider it dieting. I eat healthier and exercise”. the convo wasn’t mean or judgmental, it was just sharing opinions, and just chatting.

When he asked me how much I hd lost, I said “over 100lbs”. His response “you’re so beautiful right now. But I bet you were beautiful 100lbs ago”. hmmmm. Basically, he likes big girls. Like he finds hips and ass and tummy sexy! I said “well I’m not planning on gaining weight” and while I’m overweight, I don’t necessarily have a stomach. My stomach is surprisingly flat. I do have hips and booty. He responded with “I think you’re gorgeous, but yes I would think you’d be gorgeous heavier too. I would still think you’re beautiful if you lost more weight, but it’s not something I really care for. You shouldn’t have to diet if your body is naturally happier at a bigger weight. Genetics has a lot to do with it”. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I just don’t know what to do here. We’ve continued to chat. It’s good convo. But, I’m just like should I be weirded out by this? I don’t think I’d be tempted to gain weight, and I don’t think he is a “feeder” lol. How do I know that  term. I just think he likes big girls. LIke bigger than me. Sure he finds me attractive. and he’s dated thin girls (all types of girls). but he just prefers girls with tummies. He’s not even in Cali, so may be I shouldn’t worry about it. But, is it wrong that I continue to respond to his messages ? Is this fetish-y? I have no idea if it’s normal. ?

ahhhhh HELP? What say you?

 

5 Responses to “Boy advice? help :(”

  1. snuggles1968 Says:

    Hey there! If this guy likes you for who you are no matter how big or how small you were/are/will be, and accepts you with flaws and all, then accept and enjoy! There aren’t many men, or women for that matter, who will like someone regardless of how they look and even less who will tolerate the ups and downs of people as they change/age over time. In my opinion, if you like the guy, why not just enjoy getting to know each other and if/when you finally DO meet, then you’ll find out if he was telling you the truth or if he was just trying to get a little on the “side”…. And YES, a guy liking a big girl is just like you being attracted to TALL guys… it’s a preference and NO you don’t have to gain weight to please him, as before, if he’s real, he’ll take you any way you are, big or small… Take it from someone who knows (my husband likes big girls too!) When I was a size 3 and first met my husband, he liked me then…. after many years together (16yrs to be exact now), he still loves me just the way I am and at my biggest I was a size 24 plus size…. and even as a lose the weight, he STILL loves me just the way I am… Be encouraged and enjoy the ride! :-)

  2. kisskiss Says:

    Thanks for your opinion Snuggles! I do like him, and our convo so far have been nice. I just worry that may be he really would want me to gain weight to be more attractive. But I shouldn’t ASSUME that. We’ll see where it goes, if it goes anywhere at all :)

  3. aerobella Says:

    If he does insist once you are together that you gain weight then it becomes unreasonable, as it’s not something you want. I think then you can explain why you won’t gain the weight back or give him the cut lol After all it’s your body and only you gets to decide what you do with it.

  4. kisskiss Says:

    bella: you’re right. I’m stressing over nothing. I’m going to keep chatting with him, if it leads to something, then cool. :)

  5. snuggles1968 Says:

    There you go! :-)

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