31stDecember

Declaring 2011 the year of being selfish

Because so often overweight folks are told they’re lazy, crazy, stupid, or selfish -  it’s very hard for some of us to put ourselves first (because it feels like it just confirm all the nasty things people are saying about us).

So my “resolution” this year is to be more selfish, I’m going to make me a higher priority.   My goal won’t be to always put myself first, or to hurt others to help myself, but I am going to stop putting myself dead last.  I always want to be in my top five.  So often, I’m not even in my top fifty.

I like helping people.  I like that about me, but I have to stop letting it pressure me into choices that aren’t in my own best interest.  Generosity is wonderful, but self-interest is important, because if I give away everything I have, I have nothing to give to anyone else.

I suspect that the more I put into me, the more I’ll have to give away.  I am making an investment in myself, and I expect it to pay off exponentially. 

 

 

 

2 Comments

jumpingbean1323 says 31st December @ 15:43

I think that’s a great idea! I never looked at it that way. Awesome advice! Thanks! :)

-Faith

ScreamingFatGirl says 31st December @ 21:20

I’ve never linked my putting myself dead last to the idea that others believe I’m lazy, crazy, stupid or selfish. I’ve also done it because I was convinced of my own lack of worth in the eyes of others (which I then internalized and applied to myself). I put myself last, I believe, in the hopes of making others like someone as valueless as me (and, of course, I was worthless because of my weight). If I put other people first, they might see some value in me beyond my appearance.

This does not work, of course, and just plays into a cycle of reinforcing my own sense that I am not important enough to deserve to have my interests ever placed above those of others and that they are justified in judging me based on my appearance. In essence, I always tried to be super nice and accommodating (allowing others to take advantage and walk all over me) in order to convince people to set their prejudice based on superficial factors and actually like me and see me as a worthwhile human being.

I’m done with that, too. Good luck in putting yourself first and happy new year!

http://screamingfatgirl.blogspot.com/


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