Yearning for… MYSELF.

Cause I’m not sure who this fat chick is!

Tired October 20, 2011

Filed under: October — jewlz280 @ 11:28 am

Even though we tried to go to bed early last night, youngest was up before the sun this AM and I am worn out.  He was up once and then the hubby got up with him since he was already getting up for work.  I guess he got him back down, but within a short time he was up again.  So, I’ve been up since around 5:30.  I tried to let him fuss some, but he went from fussing to screaming like he was dying.  So, up we got.  I drifted off to sleep on the couch, but thankfully woke up and was able to get oldest up and off to school.  But I’ve been up and going since then.  Already had breakfast and all that jazz and it’s just now 8.  That’s early for me!

One thing with getting up this early, I didn’t weigh.  I was too tired and distracted.  So, I have no record for today.  I’m sure it would be up.  It always seems to be up so I guess 195 is my new ‘norm’.  I just don’t know what I’m doing wrong that my weight is just sitting there now.  I’ve not changed anything at all.  So, what I may do is stay on plan this weekend and not have my relaxed day.  I hate to do that since I so look forward to relaxed day, but I’m not sure what else to do.  What may have hurt me last week, I don’t know.  I think my weight is up right now from the leftover Chinese… probably just from pure sodium!  The week before I was ovulating AND we had date night on Thursday.  I just don’t get how most people can do just OK and lose but I can be on it and not lose a whit.  There is NO WAY I am consuming enough calories to be gaining.  Maybe not to lose a ton, but definitely not to gain.  It’s just frustrating to be on my game for the majority and somehow feel like I am punished if I am off a bit for one meal.  I lost in August and September, but unless something happens in the next couple of weeks (and I am thinking no since TOM rolls around the end of the month), I am going to have a ZERO or even a gain month.  I had really, REALLY hoped for October to be a great month.  Since it happens that it is a 5 week weigh-in month for me.  But instead, I’ve lost 2 weeks already.  It just really bums me out.  Aargh!

I don’t have much planned for today.  It’s still cold and dreary out.  I don’t feel like car shopping even though my SUV seems worse off now than even before.  I cleaned the floors like crazy yesterday with a full vacuum and then a full steam.  I probably should vacuum and fold up some laundry, but that’s about it.  I guess I could clean out oldest’s room, but I really want him here to help pick out a few things to let go.  We try to do that twice a year and it was done back in Spring before his b-day.  So, it is time to do it again!  I’d also like to clean up his bookshelf.  We read a book a night and so far, the books have just gotten shoved everywhere.  So, his bookshelf needs to be put in some kind of order.  I am thinking of moving all the ones we’ve read to the bottom shelf and then after a book is read off of the top shelf moving it down.  But we will see.  That, or we have to find some way to mark where the ones that have been read are because they PREFER we read a NEW book every night.  I know, sounds crazy but they have a library at school so he gets two of those a week.  And we can re-read a book, they would just rather we read new ones.  He has enough to probably read every book one time until well into Spring.

My point is, there’s always things to do but I don’t HAVE to do much and honestly, I don’t feel like doing much.  I could work on a project, but I don’t even know where to start at this point.  I was so productive the other day and now it’s freezing outside!  So much for getting all the painting done out there.  That may have to wait until Spring.  Although, if it warms back up for a bit I may be able to get SOME of it done.  Maybe the rest of the caulk and at least a good coat on the back where it’s new.  Then the rest could wait if need be.  I just hate being tired like this — I don’t want to do anything when I’m so tired.  AND, it makes me feel like I wasted going to bed early… like it was pointless.  🙁

OK, well, going to get off of here and quit complaining.  I need to get youngest down for nap and try to find some motivation to do something besides sit here on my tush.


One Response to “Tired”

  1. andly Says:

    I found that the only way I was able to survive my kids crazy sleep hours was to sleep when they slept. I didn’t pressure myself to get everything done when they were napping. If I needed it, I would nap at the same time they did. It’s perfectly normal to have plateau’s…even long ones…don’t give up. Maybe you need to up your calories for a week by 100-200. Sometimes if you aren’t eating enough calories you plateau and a boost can signal your body to start losing again. Good luck!

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