Fighting Through Evil Cravings!

I have been having some really unmotivated “fat days” these past couple of days. I haven’t eaten off plan or anything like that, I haven’t even eaten any of my Weekly Points; I try not to. I don’t know if it does anything by not eating them. I have really been working hard on trying to get all my milk and fruits and vegetable lately. I never really have a problem drinking my daily water because I bought two special water bottles and I fill them up from the brita pitcher and keep them in the fridge. My two water bottles are 6 8oz glasses of water so it is exactly enough. I have also been taking a vitamin everyday which is hard because I hate swallowing pills and they usually make my stomach hurt. It hasn’t been hurting lately though.

My theory behind the stomach pains is that, before I ate healthy when I took a vitamin it was like so much health hitting me that my body would reject it with pain haha. Now that I actually eat fruits and veggies, and drink milk and water, when the vitamin hits my tummy it is like mmmmm more nutrients. All I need to do now is start weaning myself off of my paxil.

I tried to do this about a month or so ago and the withdrawals were unbearable. I take 50mg of Paxil CR a day for my anxiety. I have been taking it for about 4 years. I started at 12.5 and moved up to 25mg for about two years. I then ended up needing to move up to a higher dose and have been on that for the last two years. My doctor told me to start just taking 25mg every day and if that wasn’t enough, take 25 one day and then 50 the next. This did not work for me at all, I was very dizzy and my vision felt like it was moving around in my head. I felt like I was having vertigo I think. I looked it up online and found a web-site called paxilprogress.com. Apparently Paxil had one of the hardest withdrawals, other than like heroin I’m guessing. They suggest going down about 5mg a month. I got a pill cutter and a lower dose of Paxil so that I can cut the pills and come down slowly. I just didn’t want to try it the same time I was starting WW.

The other day I went to Fashion Bug to look for something to wear to JJ’s graduation. I wanted something cute that wasn’t slacks. His parents and family are all going to be there. I found this black spaghetti strap summer dress and got a cover up to go over it. The only bad thing is that I was required to realize what size I really am. Stretchy things it doesn’t matter so much, but this dress wasn’t stretchy at all. I had to get a size 24 in it and it is still quite tight. I think that is what contributed to my “fat day” attitude all week. Luckily I have a foundation that I wore under my bridesmaid dress at my cousins wedding.

Both Thursday and Friday I rode my bike a mile at the track and then walked one lap. I was really hoping I could ride two miles but I struggle though just the mile. My thighs get so sore and I have to concentrate on my breathing. I hope maybe in two weeks, three at the most, I can ride two miles. I bought Carmen Electra’s aerobic striptease workout collection today at Best Buy. I think it looks fun and I heard it was a good workout. If anyone has any other good workout dvd’s they like please please comment and let me know what they are called.

Daily Points: 34
Curves Bar 1
Banana 2
Yogurt 2
Cereal 4
Milk 2
WW Calzone 6
Sugar Free Jello 0
Carrots 0
Turkey Sub 8
Apples 1
WW Fudge Bar 1
Points left for the day: 7

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