My intake today has been good so far,….i say so far, because i have to get thru supper yet and that is my bigggest meal and we are likely eating out , which is an obstacle in itself!

I think i do pay too much attention to the scale at times…i used to only weigh in weekly at a weight loss support group but as i got near the end of pregnancy…i didnt feel like going and bought my own scale…then i became obssessed with it and faithfully weighed in every single morning hoping to see some action.  I`ve toned it down abit because it seemed to rule the rest of my day….if i saw a loss, i was estatic and if i  saw a gain i was down all day or worse yet i would reward a gain with food or a “little” extra because i could afford it,, ya right!!!   So now weighing in once a week will be what it is.  This way i can focus on whats important, the nutrition and the excercise.

I stil have to grasp that this has to be a lifestyle change, something that i can live with forever. Food is such a hard addiction to battle.  Food is everywhere and nearly everyone i know is overweight and in the same boat…altough some choose to be happy with it , whereas i can`t be.  I want to be a healthy body weight for my age and height,,, i dont want to be perfect but i want to atleast be able to shop at normal stores and not have to spend a fortune for just one shirt! and the selection would be so much better.

I remember my weight loss last year of 50 lbs….droppping almost 3 pants sizes and being able to finally choose nicer clothes.  It was such a great feeling. I long to feel that again!! this time i need to focus on how to maintain it and not let it creep back up on me. 

I saw a girl on the news this past week, who lost 200+ pounds by walking and cutting down on her portion sizes. She said that when she felt bored instead of turning to food, she put on her shoes and started walking,, walking further and further every time.  I want to be that person who doesnt run to the kitchen at every chance she gets and has the energy to throw on the shoes and just go. 

Its going to take along time but i can do this.

Last Weeks weight = 373

Todays weight = 373.2

total loss/gain = +0.2

14 week totals:  starting weight = 396.6 - 373.2 = 23.4 pounds…

I am discouraged this morning with the slight gain ive had..I have felt like this week was good overall and i made some good choices,, but some bad as well….I felt like i had more positives than negatives and can`t figure out why the scale doesnt reflect that. Its 0.2 and i will get it off this week….

The good is that ive excercised 4 days this week,,i just finished the walk away the pounds 1mile walk video before logging on here.  I also did 45 sit ups in an attempt to rid myself of my big ole belly!  My excercise is right on track and now i just have to focus on my eating it seems. 

When i was successful in the past of losing the weight,, it took me a while to get both excercise and food on the same page…i know that i can`t do only one of the two ,, that they work together…now its just getting the mindset to get down to business. This time i want it to be the last time forever. 

I had made it as lows as the 340`s and then gained it back plus more.  I know what it took to get there.  I never counted calories,, i just wrote out a food journal on paper and made sure i excercised every day that i could. 

This week i will photocopy my food journal and start writing it out again…i think it helps keep me accountable. 

I also want to be more active……in normal everyday ways if this makes any sense? I want to not spend as much time infront of the t.v and more time doing other things that keep me moving my big ole body. I would love to walk my 10,000 steps per day but it will take some work to get to that level.

I love using my pedometer and maybe i should start keeping track of my steps again for more motivation. 

I want my kids to see an active mother who doesnt grumble whenever she walks across the floor. Really its a chore to do anything at this weight, it really is.  I want to set better examples for my son,, since he is also already overweight for his age. …i feel responsible for this and I want to change myself so that he can unlearn all the wrong he has learnt from me.  I failed him in this way and I have the chance to change things for my baby girl so that she doenst learn to live this unhealthy lifestyle. 

I want my family to be more active in general…the summer is coming and there are far better things to do than sit in front of the t.v.

Thanks for reading along

UPDATE: 34 minute walk to/from the park tonight with the kids!! yeah for me and no junk foood today!!

Monday : 1 mile walk away the pounds video

Tuesday : 34 minute walk outside

Wednesday: 1 mile walk video

I`m on a roll….as far as excercising goes….I am hopeful that tommorrows weigh in will be a good one. I havnet taken any peeks this week, so I have no idea where i stand.   Ive done better overall and made some good choices. 

Last night, dear sweet hubby went on a tim hortons run and asked what i wanted,,,i told him a peach juice.  He said, dont you want an ice cap?? this is a large ice cap with whip cream on top and caramel sauce (supreme) and i said no…he said i can get you both?! I again said no….he came home with both!! UGH!!! With the ice cap staring me straight in the face…i didnt know what to do…I quietly drank half of the cup and then THREW THE REST IN THE GARBAGE and put the peach juice in the fridge!! This is a small accomplishment to others but it was huge for me.  I am used to having this every night or nearly every night anyways. 

After all was said and done and we were heading to bed…i told hubby why i said i didnt want it  and that was because i was trying to make an effort to be more sensible with the food i eat.  I told him he was enabling me by bringing it here against my wishes.  He has vowed  to listen to me from now on.  Not to say that i wont ever have an ice cap,, because i wont deny myself of anyting but it cant be every single night anymore….once  a week would be enough or even less.  There are other choices and I am able to make them for myself .

Yesterdays walk was to the neighbourhood park,, Noelle is getting so big that she actualy fit into the baby swing and i gave her a few pushes and then we walked back home. I was tired and sweating buckets.  The worst thing about being this heavy has to be the profuse sweating,, i hate this!! I sweat even when its not even that hot outside.  Its really terrible.  Its one thing that i look forward to getting rid of as i shed this weight.  That ..along with the constant aches and pains that never seem to subside.  Everyday tasks are huge jobs when you are this overweight.    I look forward to ridding myself of this extra person that i lug around with me every single day,, the person i carry on my back.

Not much else to report today…..stay tuned for tommorrows weigh in results!! Cheers!

Its cold here this morning, windchill cold….but once it warms up a bit,, Noelle and I will head out on a walk around the nieghbourhood.  I am planning on keeping busy today and keeping my intake on track , along with my water! Ive messed up long enough now and its time to get this party started:)

My small goal this week is to take off atleast 1.4 pounds off this big ole body….I can do it..if i put my mind to it.  This amount will bring my totals to 25lbs lost since having Noelle on January 29th.  I havnt been able to get to it,, yet ive been so close. 

The next goal will be to get myself out of the 370`s…last weeks weight was 373,,, so only 3lbs to take off to get there!! I remember the horrid stomach flu and seeing those numbers 360`s on the scale and it feeling so good …..can`t wait to know that it was my own doing that got me there!!

I need to stick to this , this time around……..i want to be more active for my kids. God please give me the strength, courage and committment to do this once and for all! I will do it this time….

Todays Weight = 373

TOtal Loss = 0.8

13 week weight loss total = 23.6

MONTHLY TOTAL WEIGHT LOSS/GAIN =  -3.2 pounds ( month of April)

This weeks been a little better ……less junk and healthier options. i managed to get excercise in 2 days out of this week, which is better than in past weeks! I am glad to see a loss , even though its alot less than i was hoping for. 

The weather has been beautiful here,, nice and sunny…lots of great walking weather.  Noelles been under the weather this week due to an allergy to CATS:( but she is on the mend now so we are looking forward to getting out there this weekend/next week.  I finally figured out how to use our new LCD tv to get my excercise videos to work!! …..did the one mile walk away the pounds video:)  Tonight we are doing grocery shopping and i am going to try to do better than last week! Ice cream was on sale,, the good kinds….cookies n cream,, heavnly hash, pralines and cream etc… 1.99 for the big tubs.  WELL, the old me snuck back out and i made a special trip back into the grocery store to buy it….4 tubs, yes 4,,, later i was back out of the store.  I couldnt resist a good deal, right…Well who can eat a serving of 1/2 cup of this stuff?? NOT me.  4 tubs of ice cream for 3 ppl!! we went thru one whole tub and half of another this week alone. I cant eat a small bowl,, i go back and forth to the freezer like a mad man! Ive decided that one tub shall be enough next time.  A good deal that costs less but adds pounds onto my already big ole body is just not so worth it in the end. 

Ive been getting my water in,, probably because its soo warm here.  one 18L jug gone within a few days!! yeah for me.

I really have to make an effort to blog every day,, that is this weeks goal and my other is to finally reach 25lbs lost!!! only 1.4 pounds needed, i can do it!

this weeks weight = 373.8

total loss = 0.6

12 wk total loss = 22.8 pounds!!

longer post will come tommorrow!

Things have been crazy….little excercise and a sweet tooth craving everything bad for me.  I tried to combat this by buying Fibre1 bars….the chocolate ones and even having one doesnt soothe the craving. ugh!! The weather has gotten better and so that excuse for my lack of going out for walks isnt working. 

The scale isnt budging one way or another……nor up nor down!! I dont want to stay at my current weight and so i must do something about it. 

Stress lately is becoming my worst enemy….my son is having huge issues with his moods and we are struggling to get him the help that he so desperately needs.  My family is now talking to me again and with that comes more stress …..the stress of dealing with everyone elses problems has been put upon me.  Ive been grumpy lately…tired and just stressed beyond belief.  I need to find an outlet to rid myself of it and what better way than through excercise!

I`ve been angry with myself for doing sooo well during the pregnancy and now not being able to focus on the diet/lifestyle changes that i did before.  Where did my motivation and determination go?? I am too tired to move my big ole body but yet Little noelle is sleeping all night sooo i am not tired for that reason. 

Any advice on how to get back up onto the bandwagon would be greatly appreciated!!!

OH AND THE GOALS:

post an update here every day!

drink my water

excercise atleast 3x per week!!

cut out the junk food,, chocolate binges!

Todays Weight = 374.4

Total Loss = 1 pound

12 week weigh in results:

Starting weight = 396.6

Current Weight = 374.4

Total Loss: 22.2 pounds

The little princess has a cold as well:( She has been coughing and sneezing since the weekend and there isnt anyting the drs can do since she is so small.  We are just using a vaporizer and keeping her warm.  I am praying that she won`t have asthma as my son suffers ALOT from this:(

Thats all for today….the PMS is starting to kick in once again and my cravings are “trying” to get the better of me…BUT so far i havent let them, which is another step in the right direction. Todays goal is to get my water in,, atleast 8 glasses…if not more.

Stay tuned to tommorrows post for my weekly appointment with the scale,,, heres to hoping shes nice to me!! Or that i have been nice to myself:)

Todays weight = 375.4

Total Loss (2wks) = 0.4

11week weight loss totals

starting weight = 396.6

todays weight 375.4

total loss = 21.2 pounds

0.4 lbs in a 2week period is just NOT acceptable..this tiny loss is something that i did nothing to achieve.  I deserved to be UP, way UP!! I havent done anything to the positive as far as weight loss /excercise/food goes…I am hopeful that next week shows some loss that i worked my ass off to acheive.  Starting with today, healthy eating and a walk with Noelle,, there are no excuses anymore!! I have to do this…and i will!