I’m sick of that scolding voice in my ear as I grocery shop, “No!” “Put it back!” “You can’t have that!”
Between reading nutrition facts panels, hovering over bins of tempting fresh breads, coolers full of creamy cheeses, cream-on-top yogurts and the like… then regretfully putting them back… I notice this negative back-chat going on.
I’ll leave a store with good, healthy choices in my shopping bag, yet feel as if I’m somehow bad, bad, bad because of what I wanted but couldn’t have. Somehow I punish myself mentally, regardless of the outcome. There’s something fundamentally wrong with that picture, I mean, I make good choices, so what’s the problem? I know other people do the same.
Martha Beck suggests a different way to get to a goal in her book, Steering by the Stars. She reasons that our true goals are actually the feeling or state of mind that we’ll experience once we reach the “goal,” whatever it is.
For me, that feeling could be the sense of well being I feel when I sit back, look around, and know I’ve done it. Anything positive I feel when I’ve achieved something, besides the “thing” itself! So, Martha suggests another way of looking at it–the fastest way to a goal is to start where you want to finish. That is, why not start with that positive state of mind in the first place? It’s bound to help!
For example, you want to buy your first home. Your true goal is the experience of living in and owning it. So to apply this thought to a weight loss journey, when you reach your goal, you’ll feel terrific inside when you catch a glimpse of the thinner “you” in a reflection. Think of how much less stress you’ll feel when you can get dressed in five minutes instead of thirty (frustrating) minutes. The experience of being me when I’m at a normal BMI is what I really want!
Beck suggests you try capturing the “feeling” while you’re on your way to the goal. Can you hold your head high and act like you will when you reach your weight goal? How much easier would that make it for you, on the way?
Studies have shown that confident, successful, proud people are reacted to with far more acceptance than troubled, angry, frustrated people. That means every experience you have out in public could be more positive for you. It’s more than just smiling–it’s feeling settled and successful inside.
I’m imagining I walk confidently into the grocery store, knowing what I want to keep maintainng my healthy weight. There’s a spring in my step. Maybe I glance at stuff not on my “list”, but without regret. I reach happily for what I came into the store for and waltz out, knowing I got what I want, without agony. Wouldn’t that be cool?
Posted on March 17th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Victories, weight loss | 5 Comments »
I dreaming of sharp, tangy feta cheese crumbled over crunchy, fresh greens, cucumber slices, a few walnuts, kalamata olives, a couple of strips of thin sliced Italian hot ham–spritzed with fig-infused balsalmic vinegar. A few Ryvita or Wasa crispbreads with a smear of goat cheese topped with apple slices… YUM.
It must be Spring, give a New Englander like me a touch of sunny weather at this time of year and everything changes. It won’t be time to get out the summer clothes for another 4-6 weeks, but until then I can work toward fitting comfortably into the clothes I couldn’t quite get into last summer.
Last summer, I had lost about 30 pounds, and had clothes of different sizes on hangars in my closet, smallest toward the back. Now I’ve lost another 15, so the clothes some of the back hangars should fit!! Every little thing helps with motivation!
Posted on March 17th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Victories, weight loss | No Comments »
At last, the scale moves. Down. Jump for joy!
I know I’m eating healthy foods but to be at a healthy weight for my frame and age, I need to lose another 40 pounds of fat. I know, so do it, already!
The March Challenge is helping, the advent of Spring is helping (OK I have to look hard to imagine Spring is really coming around here), and this blogging site is helping, too. Also back in the habit of tracking what I eat consistently on the Daily Plate. But mostly I think it’s time.
Posted on March 12th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: weight loss | 2 Comments »
Since I’ve been doing so well with eating and moving and still don’t see action at the scale, I’ll grouse.
One of my favorite times of the year used to be early Spring for one reason… it was light at 4AM!! My natural waking time (about 5AM in the Winter) would just naturally move up until I’d wake just before 4, throw on some clothes and go out. I loved walking in that very early morning light when the world around me was asleep and I was the only moving thing. I’d see all sorts of wildlife and start my day off with positive peace images–a nice sense of space!
But the increase in Daylight Savings Time has washed that all away! Now it’s dark on my morning walk again, it’s even dark on my way to work… for a light-dependent woman this isn’t isn’t a happy state of affairs! I know, get a life, right?
I read yesterday that rather than saving energy resources, an important underlying support for increasing the duration of DST is from the retail sector. Why? Because people prefer to shop in the daylight. WUWT?
Posted on March 11th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Fits and Starts | 1 Comment »
Ever since I sat on an old wood bench set up in the dune grass and found a beach rock, shaped like a heart, left there on the bench for whomever happened upon it, I’ve looked for them myself.
Rocks are nothing new, in a former life (1983 through 2000) I worked for a firm of consulting engineers as a geologist… so the interest in rocks isn’t new, but the casual interest, that is, in rocks shaped naturally into something resembling a heart - is.
I’ve been collecting them ever since, putting at least one in my pocket most weeks. Often I leave one on a bench for someone to find. I put them in my plant pots and saucers, use a few others for a paperweight at work.
Yesterday I found three, left two on a bench, and saved the other to send to my cousin, who’s battling stg 4 cancer. I saw at the bookstore recently a book with beautiful photos of heart rocks. Nice.
The upside to this weight loss journey is the mindfulness that seems to be so important to success. Or I should say, an upside, one of many.
Posted on March 10th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Serendipity | 1 Comment »
OK - it’s snowing now, but I’m still reeling with pleasure from the gorgeously warm (upper fifties) sunny weather this weekend. Fifties means shirtsleeves here in Maine!
Spent most of both days outside, walking in the amazing sunshine. It was windy, but too warm for a jacket, esp in the lee of the rocks or in the woods. It blew out those cabin fever cobwebs!
I recommend the March challenge at eileen2blean.com . Figure we can all profit from another layer of accountability. One star for one hour of exercise, another for staying within the boundaries of your personal program. Awesome.
I was fixated on spicy food choices this weekend, not so much cravings as proximity to the best authentic little Mexican place in Southern Maine. But I stayed within my goal by dint of walking my butt off and splitting my portions with my dog. Trust me, one way to moderate serving sizes and banish temptation is to offer him a bite for every one I take, minus the hot salsa for his share.
I didn’t get my bike out, but next weekend, if the roads are clear of ice, I will. I really miss riding my bike.
Since I got my puppy I just haven’t wanted to leave him behind, so I’ve virtually stopped riding. He’s too big for a bike trailer, but his little legs (he’s a Bassett Shepherd mix) are too short to run for 8-10 miles–and I don’t have places to ride where he’d be safe alongside me, the roads are too narrow and there aren’t many bike paths. But leaving him behind hasn’t seemed fair.
So this year will be different. Instead of riding all day the way I used to, I’m going to schedule blocks of time for me to ride after his walk. That way we’ll both get what we want.
Posted on March 9th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Diet Pal, Dogs, Serendipity, weight loss | 1 Comment »
I crave sunshine and fresh air–today just took my breath away, it was finally over 50 degrees, sunny, breezy, just lovely to be out in. We went to Fort Foster. Wet feet from all the melting snow and puddles, wind blowing my hair in my face, nothing bothered me. The sea was a beautiful shade of blue, the tide was way out. Watching Jackson race back and forth, back and forth on the path–his joy at life today lifted my heart and spirits.
I didn’t want to stop walking, so we wandered on for over two hours, through the woods, along the shoreline, over the rocks. We climbed up a big boulder and sat top (warm rock!), watched a sea kayaker in the river. We met a dog that looked just like Little Orphan Annie’s Sandy (I told Jackson about him later on. I used to love Sandy and want a dog just like him.)
I treated myself to a fish taco at my favorite little mexican place and then had sushi for dinner with friends. Then another half hour with the Jackster, walking in town. He’s totally jonked out now, so shall I be in a very few minutes…
Posted on March 7th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Dogs, weight loss | No Comments »
Lovely walk on the beach this AM (lovely because I beat the rain). Tide was v. high, just a thin strip of sand… gray, angry looking sea!
Then less than a half hour after arriving at work I was buried… the day just reared up and smacked me between the eyes… nothing new.
Staying healthy, getting healthy… I’m 50% of the way to my goal, a normal BMI, the least stress on my joints possible, decreased risk of heart and or stroke. I was doing really well before Christmas, then came to a screeching halt. And can’t get the engine going again. I walk, I eat good things, I track. I feel good! But sometimes I eat too much of the good things, walk slower, skip tracking. And, years ago, I weighed what I do now for a long time, so one could argue my body is holding onto where I am, no matter how I feed it.
Damn, I need to feel accountable again. Wish I had a daily diet pal.
Posted on March 6th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Diet Pal, weight loss | 4 Comments »
I love this blog, I can mouth off a bit, stay centered on the getting healthy part, get a win win. Eat reasonably, not reactively. Keep those little emotion buttons away from the triggers that send me right off to a vending machine.
I have a job, I’m healthy and self-supporting. As long as I can earn, I can make it through. Our raises are postponed, OK - if it keeps the place open. I’m keeping my head above water, paying off debt, everything on time. I’m even picking up bottles on my walks with the dog… hey, I made 25 cents on my walk Sunday, if I do that every day of the week I’m keeping the roadway picked up and saving a little cash, nothing wrong with that.
Commonly experienced hardships pull people together and I’ll bet hundreds of people have written something quite similar to this within the last half hour! I wonder if action really breeds action?
My partner though this:
Posted on March 5th, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: Dogs, weight loss | 1 Comment »
Two dreamy pals, Gulf of Maine in the distance.
They sit on a basalt dike (what we in Maine call “traprock”) at the edge of the beach where I walk each morning with my dog. Thought they were fetching.
I applied an “ORTON” technique to a shot of two pears… it adds an ethereal, dreamy quality to the photo. http://www.naturephotographers.net/articles0406/kn0406-1.html This is a link to an article about applying Michael Orton’s “look” to pictures. I love the depth it gives them.
A local artist, Val McGinty (? not sure I have his last name right), frequently paints pears posed like this; he was the inspiration for the shot.
Hey, gotta do something interesting while walking the straight and narrow, foodwise! And something to do with my hands.
Got my invitation for the NYC Five Boroughs ride, which I did 3 times in the past, The last time I registered was cancelled because of the 9-11 attack (the ride began at the base of the towers) and I never went again. Now my knees are doing a funny swelling thing when I ride, something I plan to defeat this summer.
Today I ate:
Morning- bowl of raisin bran, small banana, 1/2 C skim milk, 1/2 C fat free plain yogurt, about a dozen dried cranberries.
Midday- Lean Cuisine Rosemary Chicken, 3/4 C homemade Chicken Soup, blood orange, sweet and salty granola bar
Evening - 3 spring rolls, soy sauce, 1 C Seuchwan veggys, 1/2 honey mustard pretzels
Walked with Dog - 30min in morning, 45 min in evening
Posted on March 3rd, 2009 by jaxie
Filed under: weight loss | No Comments »