So I just realised that I’ve never written a post on my reasons for dieting and I figured I should give it a shot. See I’ve never liked my own body, always felt awkward and wanted to hide away. While I wasn’t classified as overweight I had the common sense to realise that my life style wasn’t healthy: sitting on my but all day snacking on sweets, chocolates, crisps and watching endless daytime tv. Where was the exercise? Where was the portion control? I would stand in front of the mirror and look away after about two seconds flat promising myself that tommorow I would start dieting, then go and stuff my face with comfort food to fill the emptiness inside me. But tomorrow never came.
I went on countless “diets” which basically involved eating nothing for maybe a few days until I broke down and binged. There was no planning, no exercise and as a result no weight loss. I was so fixated on shedding the pounds in a lazy way that I even spent a ridiculous amount of momey on some diet pills though in the end realised they would probably do me more harm than good and didn’t take any. Through all of this did I for one moment realise that all I had to do was eat less and exercise more? No. It seems I couldn’t see the wood for the trees or maybe I just didn’t want to put in the effort.
Then something happened. My friend (who is actually classified as obese) went on a diet. And lost weight. She was doing something that I had always dreamed about and it inspired me. I brought the 30 Day Shred which she was doing, started the same running programme, saved up for a treadmill, begun making my own meals and downloaded myfitnesspal to monitor my calories. And guess what? I lost weight. I never thought it would be so easy, never thought I could do this. Hell, I never thought I could feel full and still be on a diet!
Yes, it is hard. But whenever I feel like throwing in the towel I think back to that girl standing alone in front of the mirror. How could I let her down? How could I let my future self down? Because I’m not happy with my body now and if I stop dieting I never will be. So I’ll carry on wishing I could lose weight, keep trying new crash diets. But I’ll never be truly comfortable in my own skin. Now I have a chance to acheive what I have always dreamed of and I’m going to grab it with both hands.
Posted on December 21st, 2012 by izzyd07
Filed under: My Boring Old Life