Losin it in Paradise

Have today off work, slept like the dead after I got off my 16 hour shift yesterday morning.  Slept til 5pm, then back in bed by 11pm and slept til 10am this morning.

Not working so not sure what to do with myself.  My hubby of course is being a pain in the ass as usual.  He works from home, has not one friend in this entire island, and relies on ME FOR EVERYTHING.  He needs stuff from town, grout etc and because I don’t want to go (I am there every fookin day with work) he will not go now.  So if I don’t go, he will not go and then he will not get grout and then of course my damn kitchen will sit unfinished another day.  He is an ass!  So of course I will go cause I want my kitchen finished, it has been torn apart for months already.   I am 100% the sole sourse of entertainment, fun and friendship for this man, and to be truthful, I hate it.  There are days I hate him.  I would love to have friends of my own, but feel guilty cause he has none and then I would have to leave him home alone while I went shopping with friends or something, and he is good at throwing the passive agressive pouting while telling me it is okay if I go and leave him home.  I HATE HIM SOME DAYS.  And today is one of them.  I feel like we are glued at the fookin hip.  I have begged him to join the gym, take up golf ANYTHING, so he can meet some people and have friends to do things with.  But he won’t.  He has done nothing with anyone but me since we moved here in Jan of 2004.  He is so the opposite of what I thought he was when I met and married him.

He is a wuss, cannot make a decision for himself or do anythign without me.  When I first met him I thought he was this strong man.  He did martial arts, was a cop and just oozed manhood.  Now I know it was all a front for his best friend back home.  Since we have been together, he does no physical activity at all.  Has gained about 40 pounds, goes absolutely NOWHERE unless I go with him.  Has not one friend, has no motivation to do ANYTHING AT ALL EVER.  I find we don’t even have anything to talk about anymore, cause he has no understanding of what I do at work, and he bores the hell out of me cause all he can talk about is what he sees on TV, cause that is all he does.  Sits in his office in front of the computer and watching the football games or politics or TV all day LONG.

Well I had best go and brush my teeth, and get ready to go to town or nothign will get done and I will have to just sit and watch him sitting on the couch watching TV and sulking.

I HATE THIS LIFE, NO WONDER I AM A FAT SLOB.  FOOD COMFORTS ME AND IS A GOOD THING BECAUSE MY HUSBAND IS AN ASSHOLE

Posted on June 16th, 2007 by islandgrl
Filed under: General