The EYES of TEXAS are upon ME
My journey
It never fails.
Posted islandchick1 on September 15th, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
I hate men. Not always. In fact I maybe don’t “HATE” them, but they sure do annoy the hell out of me. Mine in particular. And that’s a whole other post - is he REALLY “mine”?
Why do men want to know answers in time?? It’s freaking riduculous. What time do you go to work? What time did you go home? Where did you go after that? How long did it take? Blah, blah, blah, FUCK that. I don’t wear a watch for a REASON asshole. MY time is just THAT! MY TIME. Not mine to share.
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyways, I stayed on plan. YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So Yeah, when you think you’ve had the worst day ever………
Posted islandchick1 on September 14th, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
If there was ever a day to NOT start your diet, this was IT! I have just had THE most riduculous day ever. I am amazed that I just didn’t say FUCK IT!!!!!!! and walk out the door. No need to go into the details, but damn. I just can’t keep this up. I seriously thought if I were ever going to have a heart attack, it would be right effing NOW! The good news now…I DID start my diet and stayed with it. I wanted something sweet in the afternoon, but I did NOT give im Yeah me!
Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Posted islandchick1 on September 13th, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
Well, after many many months of failure, here I am. I have gained 27 freaking lbs since I went off Atkins. Here’s the kicker. I manage a floral dept. in a grocery store. I should have access to all the food that is good for me. Well that is true. HOWEVER, I ALSO have access to ALL the food that is NOT good for me. I am under a tremendous amount of stress as well. Both professionally and personally. Basically, the way i see it at this very moment, is that my life pretty much sucks.
Sooooooooooooooooooooo. I am committing myself to start all over again. I guess that’s better that not trying at all. Believe me, I could so just effing give up on everything right now 
I’m going to try and comment on myself, my feelings, my triumphs, my progress and my failures and hopefully my successes every day.
If you could imagine being on the top of a 100 ft tall building that was squared, and standing at the farthest point of the corner without falling off, THAT is where I am at right now. It just won’t take much for me to loose my footing and go right over the edge Am I depressed? Hell yeah! More than anyone knows. I am hurting inside and nobody knows it but me.
Sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Posted islandchick1 on February 22nd, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
Well today wasn’t as stressful as yesterday. I went to bed and woke up with the thought that perhaps this just isn’t for me. THEN I think, you know, I CAN do this but it’s just so freaking frustrating NOT having reliable help. I tried to get the other girl but she is already booked for the week OR she doesn’t want to come back over here. I kinda don’t blame her. She is used to working in a very efficient dept. Mine is still so damn chaotic. :(
So this morning in the IDL (Mgr.’s) meeting, the store director was giving me kudos for raising the Valentine’s sales by 15,000. 
The other dept. mgr.’s were giving me congrats also. So THAT made me feel good, like maybe it has been worth it all afterall.
I ranked in the upper part of the middle in relation to how all the stores ranked. Now, the stores that were in the top 20 all had refrigerated trucks and were way larger volumn stores than me, so in the whole scheme of things having the limited resources (labor) that I had, I did pretty effing great!
So anyways, The brain splitting migrain that I had all day is FINALLY gone.
Hope tomorrow I will be able to put the stupid seed display together.
So yeah…the worst effing day ….EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted islandchick1 on February 21st, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
Have you ever just had a f***ed up day from start to finish?
I manage a floral dept. at a major grocery store. And no, I’m the real deal, I had always been a designer at large volumn florists then lost my effing mind and decided I wanted to be a “manager”. BFD!!!!
The person they hired to be my designer is sweet, but is pissing me the hell off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don’t know what all she did yesterday, but I know what she didn’t do.
I feel like I walked into a bomb zone today. She and I gotta have some words. She is sickly but I am tired of being a one man band. Today, I was as close to just saying FUCK IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and walking out the damn door.
I stayed 45 minutes late just to effing finish all the BS THEN stayed another 30 minutes just to fill out my daily paperwork.
If things don’t change and I mean real quick like, I’m gone.
I cannot even express the level where my irritation and anger is at right now.
Oh btw I weighed in at 215.
Here again.
Posted islandchick1 on February 20th, 2011 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
I have no idea how many days into the “diet” I am. After starting my new job, I stopped blogging with any regularity. I have been completely emotionally and mentally drained.
I want this job to really work out, but I just still don’t know. The store is full of corporate creepers and crawlers. I am very content being in my corner of the store. I have met less than a handfull that I thought were truly genuine. And for anyone that knows, me they would know that fake people truly bother me.
I have been taking some mental notes though in case I decide to stay through Mother’s day. I know some people may have thought they “got one over on me” and in fact, they did. BUT I do remember.
So here I am with the diet blog. The thing about the job is I have wasted the entire 2 1/2 months I have been there NOT staying on plan. I am at 217 LBS. I plan on weighing and measuring every week like before, but things can just get so freaking crazy and screwed up.
This Wednesday, I will turn 49. I want to have lost all my weight by my next birthday. At 50 I want to be h/w/p. It would be the 1st time since I started having kids in my early twenties.
So that’s where I’m at. I hope all your goals are being met with great success!!
DAY 140 WEEK 19
Posted islandchick1 on December 13th, 2010 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I am soooooooo off track. On my period and verrrrrrry tired. Oh and my weight???????????????? Yeah I totally blew everything and honestly, I am not quite sure how. I was at 216, teetering on 215, then BAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
So today, I was at 227 YUKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK
So, TODAY was the 1st day at my store (new job). There was a BIG truck on Sunday. SOMEHOW, none of THAT got processed OR put up. I spent the whole day processing what was in the cooler THEN had to really hustle to get the 3 flats of stuff out of receiving. I know better now to not be Ms. Nice girl when it comes to the scheduling. I can’t help but feel like she knew that stuff was there. BUT rather than start off the realtionship by being bitchy, I am just going to consider it a hard lesson learned. I will NOT let her have Mondays or Fridays off anymore. There is SO MUCH to do. Ironically, I know there is now way in hell M would be able to have done even half of what I did today AND it still wasn’t enough. I didn’t even do all the paperwork (reports & stuff) I was supposed to do. It was completely overwhelming. I worked hard and fast ALL DAY. I am just going to have to get familiar with the daily routine to get in a groove. The old mgr was helpful. I realize I can’t take her from her job to help me do mine, but I think she realized how out of the water I am/was.The only thing I can do is just try to do my best and get as much done as possible. I am going to check on the 30 minute lunch thing too. I REALLY want to be able to do this. I like the set up of the shop very well. I just hope they will have a little patience with me while I learn it all and TRUST ME - there is ALOT to learn.
NOW for the good news
I am walking alot in the store so I don’t have to stress about not getting in any walking. But dang, my feet, legs, and back are KILLING me But maybe this will help get me going again. I have to get to bed before 11 EVERY night to really be rested. I got up at 7am to be there by 9am but I felt rushed. So I will have to get up at 6 from now on I have sooo many animals to take care of, it’s really frustrating.
Anyways, the blog is caught up. I don’t know how long it will stay that way, but for tonight it is 
DAY 131
Posted islandchick1 on December 4th, 2010 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It’s has been AWHILE since I last blogged. With me starting the new job and everything, I just haven’t made the time
So backtrack real quick. My last day at my old job was this past Tuesday. It was bittersweet and of course, I cried a little. It was very nice. They had taken up a collection of money to help me with clothing expenses rather than have a good meal. Everyone knows I am on Atkins and have made some really wonderful compliments on my 50 lbs lost.
I started the NEW job on Wednesday. It is going to be more paperwork than I really wanted to be doing. But that’s ok :) . There are SO MANY reports, you have NO IDEA ( I didn’t either). It does seem to me though, they could really save a TON on paper expense if they would just computerize it all. But who am I??
The first 2 days have been REAL OVERWHELMING 
They said it would be and it was, but it is getting better. I am a book worm and I learn the best by being able to actually read and review the information first. I like to take notes to have for referrence. The first 2 days however, H was just going over the different reports and policies verbally. On the 3rd day though, I was able to review the reports on a computer screen and analyze them more accurately ( and take notes )
My biggest thing is going to be working on Sundays
We’ll see how that goes.
Anyways, I am feeling caught up now
DAY 124
Posted islandchick1 on November 27th, 2010 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
Ok……Thanksgiving is over and done. I believe I did ok. There were lots of things I could have ate but chose NOT to
I went and took my drug test and criminal background check. I P~A~S~S~E~D… I knew I would. I don’t do anything.
Anyways. I will take my training at the Hulen St store, which is fine with me
I went and bought my shoes, belt, slacks, and white shirt. It’s ok that I have a uniform of sorts. I will be eligible for vacation after 1 year. The amount of time allowed will build over the years. There are lots of great benefits with this company. I want to be a fair manager.
I learned that they hired the other lady,R, as the part time designer. That is ok with me. I HOPE that it is ok with HER. I got the distinct impression as I said earlier, that she would have rather I be working for HER than SHE be working for ME. I was informed that she was very chatty and I would have to figure out a way to keep her on task. I hope that she doesn’t try to undermine me with her having all the Tom Thumb experience. I will just look to God for guidence in this manner. They really wanted me to start on Monday, but I said no.
Anyways, weight wise, I held at 219! Back to STRICT INDUCTION for a bit until it kicks in good again. I have to wait and see what is the deal with lunch, how long and where, and if we will have refrigeration and a microwave available. If not, I’ll figure something out.
I’m very appreciative that they believe I have what it takes ( with training) to be a manager. Here’s what I think the game plan MIGHT be….I think they didn’t give R the manager’s job yet. I think they are going to train me and let me get my manager’s feet wet at 1972 then I will transfer to a higher volumn store and R will manage 1972. I think she mentioned something about it being close to her house. We shall see
DAY 120
Posted islandchick1 on November 23rd, 2010 | Filed under Uncategorized | Comment now »
Welllllllll
I tried to give myself a little boost and it turned into a flop ;(
I was really feeling like I could wear a smaller size jean. Sooooooooooo I went and bought them…………
BAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA…Yeah RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I Won’t be defeated by that. I will just have a pair WHEN I have lost enough to wear them
Funny how weight loss can MAKE or BREAK our day and control our moods.
M is STILL being snickety (gossipy) about my leaving. One one hand, it pisses me off, BUT on the OTHER hand, I don’t give a crap anymore. She will become someone else’s (most likely S’s) problem. I know they are not going to hire anyone to replace me. Less on the payroll you know lol
I just want to stay as positive as possible. She and I haven’t said too much to each other since I told her that the whole T thing pissed me off and really hurt my feelings and that was why I started looking for a full time job.Anyways, as Buzz Lightyear says “To infinity & beyond” Upwards and fowards.
I try to listen to praise and worship music each night. It just lifts my mood
I can get in some reaaaaaaaaaaal funky moods lol
Anyways….I feel FAT as hell