meatloaf= binge December 3, 2008
I have been doing so good lately with my food. I mean yeah I ate a lot on thanksgiving, but it was planned and It was my “treat meal” for the week. I haven’t binged just out of the blue for a long while….until tonight. (i am still awake because I am a night owl) so, its still tonight to me, lol. Now, it wasn’t planned at all, but I sort of saw it coming all day. I use to be a very good cook. I would cook a big elaborate meal about 4-5 times a week back in the “old days” before my change. so now that my whole way of cooking and eating is different, I dont make those old favorites I use to make all the time. One of my very favorite meals was my yummy meatloaf. It had been ages since I made it, so I planned on making it tonight with the intention of only eating one portion of it with a small portion of roasted potato’s and corn. I made it with very lean ground beef. anyway…..all day I have been a little apprehensive about it because I sort of “knew” that this was going to be a challenge (to not go back for 2nds). I ate good all day and worked out. Then I made the dinner. It smelled so good, It turned out perfect, and soooooooooo scrumptious. You see where this is going right? I had two plates. Then somewhere along the way that turned into some ice cream, and some cheeze its (left over from thanksgiving) and then later, some more meatloaf and potato’s. I felt it coming on, and I know why it happened. I just can’t make those yummy big elaborate meals any more. The meatloaf meal obviously triggered some evil thing in me that made me want to eat, and eat and eat. so, now I am left feeling way too full, defeated, and guilty. The way I figure it is i am going to use this as my Treat meal (well more like two) for this week and just eat real clean tomorrow. The whole time I was eating this crap I was totally aware of what I was doing. some times when i eat too much I dont even realize what Im doing but tonight I knew….and I did it anyway. WHY??? I also knew that I was going to regret it, but yet i still shoveled in the food. I am just going to have to work harder at the gym for the next few days. I deserve a swift kick in the ass!
btw, i added a little more info and background to my “about me” section. I feel closer to all of you guys now and thought I should open up a little more.
B- fruit smoothie with nonfat yogurt (very good)
L-salad with spinach, hard boiled egg, and sunflower seeds, with lite honey mustard
S- ww ice cream bar
D- meatloaf, roasted potato’s, corn, brownie ice cream, cheese its, a little debbie cake, more meatloaf and potatos. and so on, and so forth.
Mmm, meatloaf. Sounds yummy yummy!
and so on and so forth…
Oh you’re the cheez-its girl. I remember that whenever I see it on your list of foods eaten. You’ve been doing great; those slips happen, good job on turning it around quickly. I watched part of a condensed version of “You on a diet” on PBS and told DH to get me the book for Christmas. It sounded packed with alot of useful information. One thing I like is the YOU-turn. It basically means for those times when you made a wrong turn, your GPS would say in a authorative, non threatening way, “At the next possible opportunity you should make a U-turn” and so should we, when we make a wrong turn or a mistake. At the next possible moment, make a YOU Turn.