why did i wait so long?

well, its not really been a happy halloween.  I have to work tonight and wasn’t able to go trick-or-treating with the fam

so for the first time ever, the kids and DH had to go by themselves. totally sucks!!! this week has been sort of a bummer. for some reason i cant get rid of the congestion in my lungs.. Its been there for about 2 months!! ugh….very annoying. my sleep schedule was all messed up this week. I work midnights so sometimes it goes haywire.  I hate sleeping during the day and being up all night on my nights off, but its almost impossible to get back to normal during the week.  so, because ive been a bit down this week, i only worked out 3times. i was on plan all week tho (except for the reese’s cup i had an hour ago) yet, i didn’t loose any weight this week. hopefully i will loose alot next week. I am working out in the morning and only doing a “treat meal” on sunday instead of a cheat day. hopefully that will kick start my weight loss this week usually if i have a slow week, the next week i will loose big. so, fingers crossed.  Happy halloween!

B- fruit smoothie (papaya, pineapple, banana blended up)

S- 2 whole wheat crackers (reese’s cup)

L-2 whole wheat crackers, bowl of chili (homemade with lean ground beef)

D- will be a big salad with hard boiled egg and sunflower seeds with lite catalina dressing

S- will be 100cal pack popcorn

I have such a hard time trying to express myself in these blogs. I wish i could be a better writer/blogger! oh well, I feel i am being successful so far on my lifestyle change. although, i know i still need to change some things. I need to revamp my “cheat day”. I am no longer going to have a cheat day. I am going to give myself a “treat” meal.  I feel like crap on my cheat days and it just doesn’t seem worth it to me anymore. why ruin everything that ive accomplished all week, by going crazy on sunday?   so, as of now…..no more cheat days!! Im actually never going to cheat again. I will have a treat now and again, because i deserve it and because i am doing this for life. It is impossible for me to never treat myself agian. but, i will not gorge on endless amounts of food for a whole day to make myself feel dehydrated, bloated, lazy, and disgusting any more! that is my promise to myself.  I am finding myself craving asparagus? i like that….. I also crave baked fish….. i guess i am truely changing my ways :D  I look forward to exercising and feel great afterword. I am thinking of getting a bike.  yes…..its a new me.

today: worked out an hour and a half

B- fruit smoothie (thats just fruit blended up) yummy!

S-handfull of low fat cheese its, 3 celery stalks with humus

L- baked fish with lemmon pepper, asaparagus

S- weight watchers ice cream bar

D- lentil soup

well, my DH has decided to join the gym and start working out with me

I am so excited about this and I hope he sticks with it.  As of right now, I weigh slightly less than he does, which is a big deal since he has been smaller than me our whole marriage.  I worked out six days in a row this week and stayed on track for all of those days. I had about a 4lbs loss this week, yey

tonight was a little stressful because it was a co-workers b day and of course they bought pizza hut. I cant control my self around the garlic bread.  I did have one bread stick and a very small bowl of the chicken alfredo.   I know this is bad, but I am not going over my calories today…so its ok. tomorrow is cheat day :)   I deserve a treat (maybe red lobster). but, i promise i will not over do it.  Lots of people complimented me on my weight loss this week.  I think this keeps me motivated even more than i already am.

about five yrs ago, i went on weight watchers and lost about 40lbs. needless to say, i got off the plan and gained it back. but, while i was doing this i did get into a size 22. I was only able to wear these jeans for about half a second before they got too small on me again. i really liked them, so i decided to keep them “just in case” you know………its been five yrs since then. yesterday i saw them in my closet and figured i should try them on. I know i weigh around the same as i did at my lowest on weight watchers. so, i tried them on! I couldn’t believe it! they fit perfectly! actually a little baggy. yey for me

Its so nice when all your hard work pays off! Its these little things that keeps me going and makes me realize this is all worth it!

hello all! this is my first blog. so bare with me.  i guess i’ll just give you my history with weight problems and my life in general.  i was  a pretty thin teenager. although i had to work at that. i started to really gain weight when i had my first child. i went from 160lbs to 220lbs in those nine months of pregnancy.  That was over 9 yrs ago. after he was born i slowly gained weight little by little yr after yr. my heaviest was about 6months ago. my starting weight was about 305lbs.  a few yrs ago i tried weight watchers and exercised regularly. i did loose about 40lbs, but got off track and quickly gained it all back. that was the one and only time i actually even tried to loose weight before now. I always knew i was obese and an over eater.  I think i just didn’t want to accept it.  I was in total denial about how unhealthy i was.  I refused to let anyone take pictures of me, and i hated clothes shoping. I couldn’t do the things i wanted to do with my kids (i have 3 now),  basically every aspect of my life was being controlled and diminished by my weight problem.  my twin sister began loosing weight in Jan of 08.  she inspired me to change my ways.  right now, we are within 10lbs of each other.   first i just started cutting down my portions and doing some light walking.  somewhere around that time, it dawned on me how completely out of shape and unhealthy i was.  slowly i became more serious about my lifestyle change and more determined to be healthier.  so, i started counting calories, and in may i joined a gym. i do let myself “cheat” about once a week. I just dont know if i could have lasted this long with out my “cheat day”. although, i have cut down on my cheat food.  the 1st couple weeks, the weight just melted off! i was so excited and motivated to see results! my indurance has improved tremendously since joining the gym. I do about an hr of cardio 3-5 times a week, and weight training every other day.  on average, I am loosing about 10lbs a month.  I am increasingly becoming a “health nut”. I eat so much healthier now. i read labels, eat tons of vegies and fruit. complex carbs, fish, turkey, and chicken.  I feel ten yrs younger! i think this blog will help me stay motivated and on track.  well, i think i’ve written enouph for now. thanks for listening!