Posted by gum232 on February 14th, 2013 |Filed Under ME |
Here I am two years to the day that changed my life forever. After what seemed like hundreds, if not thousands, failed attempts at losing weight, I began the journey to what would become a success story. What drove me to the point of change is asked. Why did it work this time? So many factors are involved when it comes to being overweight mentally, physically and emotionally. All I can really say is that I was sick and tired of being sick and tired. I didn’t really live life the way I wanted to or could have. No reason to have regrets because that doesn’t change the fact that for over thirty years I existed in a body that suffered from being over weight to morbidly obese. I never realized how bad that I really felt till I know now what it feels like to feel good.
I made changes in my food consumption. There are foods that I don’t foresee me ever putting in my mouth again. I might try a nibble and spit it out these days. If I go off of my program/regiment I typically stay within the realms of foods that I choose to eat but perhaps exceed the measured portion size. The biggest thing I can tell you is that eating nothing boxed or canned has for sure rid my body of many chemicals and preservatives that aren’t natural. The only things i eat now are canned low fat chicken breast, albacore tuna, rarely salmon, and boxed would be melba toast, and low fat high fiber flat bread, pitas, etc. Writing down what I eat helps so much to stay aware and to help pinpoint any problem areas.
When I started journalling, or blogging, my story I called it a rite of passage. It has been a process that has been the hardest thing in my life to do. It has been an every day issue to deal with, not just a one time thing. Through so many meals and situations where I have chosen to make healthy choices over an array of menu items available. I have prepared and taken my own meals into numerous events and gatherings and even into restaurants to eat with friends. At this point it doesn’t bother me anymore. I have gone through probably a ton of clothes from size 30 to now 12/14s. Unfortunately there are some people that have chosen to pull out of my life for whatever reason. That’s one of the worst things to happen after years of friendship.
To get to where I have come has not been easy. I have never been here before so it’s all new to me. I am enjoying my new found size and capabilities. I am still me, believe it or not, though a lot of times people don’t recognize me. That has been a struggle because I still see out of the same eyes. If I am not me then who am I? Well I have come to the conclusion that I am a new improved model of the me that’s been here the whole time.
Who would have thought two years ago I would be sitting here happy to be me? I had not enjoyed being me for a long time and had gained the identity of so many other names, or titles, that wasn’t a true representation of me: daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend, Girl Scout Leader, PTO Chair, employee. I was not serving those roles to the best of my capability because I was not capable to do so trapped in that body. World welcome the new and improved Heather! I expect that I am better at all the tasks those titles hold. I am so thankful that from somewhere deep inside me that the strength was found to overcome everything thrown my way to come out on the other side smiling.
What a privilege that has be bestowed upon me, yes me, I still can’t believe it myself, to become the example and now inspiration to others to make healthy choices and lose weight. I doubted that this journey would have lead me to where I am today but am so grateful and humbled to have accomplished the near impossible feat of losing an extreme amount of weight. Surgery was not an option for me so I lost it all my the good ole hand to mouth method. I move so much more than I ever did before yet find it difficult to find time in my busy schedule to exercise on a routine. I will do as I can when I can is all that I can promise myself right now so I have to be good with that.
If you have followed my blog thank you. I hope I have said something to touch your heart that makes you value yourself a little more, a lot more.